“Then nothing. You’ll work for me, and that will be that.”
“What happens afterward? If I decide to… you know.” I didn’t dare move back, too enraptured with what could unfold.
“Nothing changes.”
Nothing changes?
What he’d just admitted was that he’d fuck me, if I let him, and go right back to… to what? How could I even begin to classify our relationship, using that word loosely. The question I had to ask myself was if I wanted to be just another notch on his belt. How would I feel if I saw him with another woman? What would he do if he saw me with another man after we did the deed? Would he even care? Would I want him to?
So many questions were up in the air, and for as much as I wanted to give in for once, take a walk on the wild side and throw caution to the wind and every other goddamn cliché, I wasn’t built that way. And moreover, I didn’t want to do anything to jeopardize my job.
Finally convincing my body to obey my brain’s command, I took a step back, then another until a respectable space stretched between us.
“I should be going.”
He didn’t say anything in response, standing there like some sort of statue as I headed for the door. When he still didn’t say a word, not to apologize, or explain, or convince me not to go, I breathed out a sigh of relief that I hadn’t been as bold as I’d wanted to be.
Or was that a sigh of disappointment?
19
What the fuck was I thinking, telling her she could do anything she wanted? Giving her free rein to make a move? Or not.
What I wanted to do was push her up against the wall and have my torrid way with her, make her beg for me to fuck her. And when she asked what would happen afterward, if she did make a move, I wanted to tell her that she would belong to me, but I couldn’t find the words. So, I’d stupidly said, “Nothing changes.” As if it wouldn’t mean a damn thing if she gave herself to me. But it would. It would mean more than I could fathom.
I wasn’t a man who chickened out. I was, however, a man who played aloof. I supposed I’d succeeded in keeping up that façade.
She’d left my apartment close to an hour ago, and her absence toyed with my head. What did she think about everything that happened? If I’d answered differently, would she have tried something? Had I misread the interest on her part? I’d left the ball in her court, but she didn’t step up. She chose to keep our relationship professional.
After another half hour of pacing in my apartment, I knocked on her door. If she answered in her skimpy pajamas again, I’d be hard-pressed not to dive on her.
Luckily for me, she wore a shirt and sweats when she opened the door, looking as beautiful as ever.
“What’s up?” Her curt tone slithered through me, and I didn’t like it. Not one bit. But I couldn’t blame her.
“I start my workout tomorrow at six. I’d like you there at five.”
“Okay.” A thick wave of silence descended, bringing with it an awkwardness I hadn’t experienced since I was a kid. Sophie shifted her feet. “Is there anything else?” she asked.
“No.”
“Have a good night.” She closed the door before I could say anything else, stealing my choice to either concede or continue a conversation.
Lying in bed later that night, I realized that Sophie had made the right choice by not taking me up on my offer. Yes, I desired her, and I believed she did me, but we’d be working together for the foreseeable future, and nothing good could come of us getting involved.
My head shouted that this was for the best.
Too bad every other part of me pushed against the common sense.
After finishing my breakfast, I left my apartment, fully intending on being the first one downstairs. But when I opened my door, Sophie stood on the landing, about to descend the stairwell. It was a quarter to five. It was the one time I didn’t appreciate someone being early.
With only a nod exchanged between us, I followed her down the steps, watching the way her hips swayed with what should have been a mundane movement. When she approached the door to the gym, she moved to the side, allowing me to insert the key into the lock. My arm brushed hers, and she stiffened, as did I. There was no way we’d be able to work together if this awkwardness between us remained. I needed to nip this shit in the bud.
“I shouldn’t have said what I did last night. That was a mistake. Luckily, you were smart enough to decline.” I’d been staring straight ahead until I turned to look at her. “It won’t happen again.”
An expression I could only describe as a blend of anger and disappointment twisted the corners of her mouth, her eyes narrowing the longer she appeared to absorb what I said.
“Good” was her only response as she shoved past me as soon as I swung open the door. Her hurried steps brought her toward the back room. The room where I’d almost assaulted her. The room where we’d been pressed against each other as I showed her how to defend herself. The room where she rubbed my affected shoulder.
