It doesn’t matter where it is, as long as it's a memory where I was once happy. Happiness doesn’t live at Toal Manor. It’s where it goes to die instead.
Turning away, I force myself to pay attention to my surroundings. I curl my toes under to force them to cramp, a small way that I keep from disassociating. Since my escape from reality is used so liberally, it can be hard for me to stay in the moment.
I’m taken deep into the house, bypassing anything that I recognize. Finally, I’m wheeled into a beautiful bedroom. Instead of feeling relief, my heart begins to pound. Everything here comes at a price. I never get anything nice, instead I’m only given just enough to continue to live and keep my curves.
This can’t be good.
The cage is lifted and I’m dropped on the ground, making me swallow back a scream of fright.
“Alec!” the woman scolds. “What is wrong with you?”
The door is opening and I see a woman with pinched features and tightly pulled back hair peering inside. In my surprise, I looked up in curiosity.
“Out you go then,” she grumbles. “Mr. Toal mentioned that you’ll need to stretch your limbs before we get started.”
Pressing my lips together to hold back any noises of pain, I force my body to move. I don’t know what’s coming, but it’s sure to be bad. Every single muscle in my body screams from being in a cramped position, and I move at a snail’s pace.
“She’s so slow,” a voice groans. The huge feet beside the woman make me believe this is Alec, the man who threw my cage.
“Alec,” the woman hisses, confirming my suspicions. “You’d be just as slow if I shoved your big body in that tiny space.”
I refuse to take her words as a kindness. She’s obviously working for Cathal, which means he’s pulling her strings. When I finally get out of the cage, I begin to stretch my muscles, hiding my winces beneath my long hair.
“Work out the kinks,” the woman mutters. “You will be performing tonight. Mr. Toal asked me to be sure I told you. You have two hours before I’ll come back to begin to prep you for everything. I’m locking the doors.”
My head snaps up at her words, and I look longingly at the bathroom door that’s ajar.
“No, I won’t be locking that up, girl. What kind of monster do you think I am?”
Alec and the woman bustle out of the room with the cart, and as soon as the door closes, I hobble toward the bathroom.
Everyone is a monster if they’re paid enough for the pleasure.
Chapter
One
RÓISIN
“Bend over. Ass in the air,”the woman grunts. I was right. This woman is in charge of a faction of Hell.
Her name is Rubella, like the sickness, which is tragic in and of itself. She’s here to groom, shower, and dress me for tonight.
Hissing as the strip rips off all hair from my asshole once I’m in position and she’s placed the warm wax, I close my eyes against the pain. I’m in some sort of pain every day. This is nothing new.
That’s the mantra I tell myself as I struggle to keep myself in a place of calm as Rubella attacks the hair on my body in a way that makes me believe that it’s personally offended her.
Once she left with Alec, I used the bathroom to tend to my very insistent needs, and then I stretched and danced for two hours. There’s a little clock up on the wall, and I used the music that plays in my mind to dance to. When I’m lucky, I can use music as my escape from reality when I’m not in motion too.
Unfortunately, the music has a way of slipping away from me when it’s not playing. I wish I could live in the melodic space all of the time.
A hard slap on my ass makes me gasp in pain, pulling me from my thoughts.
“Raise your right leg, girl,” Rubella says. “Be quick about it. I had no idea you had so much hair on your body.”
I don’t have access to a razor, so I don’t know what she expects. Moving quickly, I close my eyes as she inspects me. It’s one more demoralizing moment that I have to endure.
“Now, there are a few pesky hairs,” she muses.
