Taking a deep breath, I realized I now needed to know who he was, the man who had fathered me. Before that day, I hadn’t cared that much, as I thought she may not have known who he was. But now Iwould do everything I could to find him. The man had wanted me dead. “I’ll stay if you tell me where I can find him, my father.”
Her backbone kicked in as she planted a hand on my chest. “No, Phoenix.”
“Surely I should be given the chance to meet the man who wanted to end my life before I was even born?”
“It wasn’t like that, Phoenix, as I said, there were complications.”
“I don’t give a shit.”
“It will only cause trouble.”
My muscles flexed, and she dropped her hand. We were now at a standoff.
I slowly nodded, glaring down at her. I had my answer as to why she left me, and so why didn’t I feel any different? Because you want her to admit she fucked up.
“You aren’t supposed to exist, remember?”
Fucking bitch. “Yeah, I remember that only too well.”
As the silence fell between us, I could hear what sounded like someone coming down the stairs.
“For what it’s worth, Phoenix, I am sorry.”
“I don’t want your apology. I want you to admit what you did was wrong.”
“I can’t do that. I wasn’t meant to be a mother, not back then.”
My frustration doubled. “But you are now?” I snarled.
Her face softened, and it felt like a knife to the chest. “Yes.”
It was now brutally obvious that nothing good would come out of staying any longer. I heard another noise behind me, and thinking it to be Harper, I spun away. “Goodbye,mother. You won’t see me again.”
The woman I was loath to call mom made a pained sound as my eyes fell onto the person who had entered the room. “I heard shouting, is everything OK?”
My half-brother, Alex. If he heard me call his mom—mother, he didn’t show it. At least, not at first.
Alex was skinny with zits, blue eyes, and dark hair. He wasn’t very tall, and we looked nothing alike. He was holding a tablet, dressed in sweatpants and a T-shirt with a character from the video game Fortnite on the front.
“Who are you?”
“It’s fine, sweety, this is the son of an old friend of mine.”
I knew it shouldn’t, but that hurt.
“OK, hi,” Alex puffed out in greeting with a strained smile. I could see he didn’t believe her. “I’m Alex.”
I felt that sound in my bones. His voice was at that in-between stage when it broke from a boy's tone into a man’s. Alex’s expression was mesmerized, and I knew he had never met anyone like me before. I could guarantee it.
I stepped forward. “Hey, yourself, kid.” He looked around twelve. That meant my mother would have gotten herself pregnant again around two years after ditching me at five.
His unsure smile gave him dimples. Seeing the boy in the flesh started to eat my sanity from the inside out.
“Alex, Mr. Carter was just leaving. He just came to give me some news,” So, I wasMr. Carternow? I noticed she didn’t give me a chance to introduce myself.
“What type of news?” I saw how his eyes glanced at the way his mother was wringing her hands. “Why are you being weird?” Alex directed this question at his mother, lowering the iPad he held.
I must have been a glutton for punishment, as part of me wanted to know more about the boy. We shared the same blood at the end of the day.
