“What I mean is that I’ve never lied to you.” I swallowed, clearing my throat before powering on. “I may have let you down, but you know that wasn’t intentional. So, I will repeat the question. Do you trust me?”
Her posture relaxed as she saw I was serious, and an uncertainty crossed her features. “Yes, of course I do.”
“Then let me make things right. You say I’ve been hiding stuff from you. So, meet me out front in an hour.”
“Why? What’s happening in an hour?” she asked, her eyes scanning my face, like the answer could be written there.
“I’m going out, and you’re coming with me.” My tone brooked no argument.
I then pushed to my feet, dwarfing her small form. Harper retained eye contact, her face full of curiosity and, dare I say, interest?
“Where are we going?”
With a glance at the closed kitchen door, I leaned forward and placed my hands on the armrests of her chair, caging her in. Before she could draw back, I planted my mouth against hers in a brief kiss. A flicker of electricity zinged between us. As I pushed back to my feet, a thrill shot through me at her flushed cheeks. I didn’t miss the way her tongue darted out to lick her lips.
“You’ll see.” I then turned around just as Ma was coming out of the kitchen with my coffee.
Taking it from her surprised hand, I pecked her on the cheek, saying, “Thanks, Ma, I’ll take that to go.”
As I turned to leave the room, Ma called out, “I hope you two haven't been fighting again?”
Over one shoulder, I replied. “No ma’am. Not today.” I then made my way back to my room to fetch my gym stuff. I’d have a quick workout at the center, knock the shit out of a punching bag, and release my pent-up aggression. Football, working out, and fighting were all a release for me; a way to work out my tension and allow me to forget the bullshit of life.
I needed to feel fresh for the looming trip with Harper.
I was going to meet my mother, but I wouldn’t go alone. I had decided to take the only person who could drive me up the wall on one hand and chill me the fuck out with the other. It was time to tell Harper what I had learned about my past.
Since we’d lived together, our relationship had been one step forward, two steps back, a rhythm we were both weary of. That was about to change. I would rebuild our friendship first, reset those foundations, and then I’d show her how I really felt.
From that point onwards, there would be no more bullshit between us. I didn’t care how stubborn my annoying foster sister could be. If Harper needed some assistance to help her through the process of sharing, I’d gladly tear down her wall brick by brick.
Whatever game she tried to play, I would only play it harder.
I was a Sawyer, and we didn’t take no for an answer.
HARPER
A tantalising hum of something wicked ran through me as I saw Phoenix standing by Reed’s car on his phone. As if sensing my presence, the big brute glanced up and waved me over, continuing his conversation with a drawn expression.
My decision to give him the silent treatment at breakfast hadn’t been pre-planned, but he’d soon coaxed me out of that state. I wondered which part of myfuck off and leave me aloneface had let me down.
I genuinely hadn’t known what to say after having come on his fingers the previous night. But I couldn’t think about that just then, or I’d melt into a puddle on the driveway.
Nix looked his usual delicious self but more polished, now in black jeans and a dark navy top; the full sleeves covered his tattooed arms. I glanced down at my ripped jeans, sneakers, and hoodie, suddenly feeling scruffy in comparison. Should I have dressed up, made more effort?
As Phoenix’s lips moved, heat continued to pulse through my lower limbs, and the memory of how they felt on mine came crashing back—and so did the slap. It was the first time I had hit him.
My reaction to Phoenix’s kiss wasn’t one of outrage; it was one of absolute shock. The way my body had come alive beneath his rough, thick fingers was wild and exciting, but also confusing. I hadneverfelt that way before; those feelings that flooded my body were alien to me. The boy who had once been my childhood friend, who was now so much more than that, had given me my first orgasm. The whole experience had overwhelmed me, as had the aftermath. I’d felt shy, embarrassed by my response to him as he had watched me come apart. Lashing out had been my way of defending myself if he had laughed at me.
As I’d left the room, I knew from his expression that laughter had been the farthest thing from his mind. If I had stayed there, we would have fucked, and the timing wouldn’t have been right. I didn’t want my first time to happen on the back of a fight.
As I had lain in bed afterward, replaying that racy sexual encounter over and over, I realized Phoenix had awakened my darkest desires. I wanted to be his, loved by him, needed, and accepted. But knowing what Nix was thinking was like trying to solve the unsolvable, and I was determined not to be the first to show my hand. If I aired how I was feeling, it would only make me weak and vulnerable to disappointment.
After much deliberation, I made my decision. I had decided that if Phoenix didn’t want something romantic with me, then I would still ask him to take something; my V-card. Even if he only took it as my friend, Phoenix was the only one I could imagine giving it to anyway. Irrespective of whether there was or wasn’t a future for us. I wanted Nix to be my first.
I walked towards him like I was being reeled in. Those heavenly eyes of his cut to mine as he ended the call.
“I wasn’t sure you’d show.” His voice was deep, an octave lower than normal, and the sound warmed my insides. Sometimes I wished it didn’t feel so good to be with him.
