The thought of Nix being thrust back into social care and transferred to another family was terrifying to me. I couldn’t survive in that house without him.
“So, what’s with the gloomy face?” Nix asked as we sat there so close to each other. I had told him a half-fib when I muttered that I couldn’t sleep. I was there after another argument with our foster sister. We had fallen out due to Dalton stamping on my wrist the night before. When I called her brother a bullying shithead, she started saying rude things about Nix. She only did it to get at me. I was numb to their nastiness even when it was physical, but if they bitched about Phoenix, that cut into me like a knife.
I decided to come clean, not about my wrist but about Daisy. Nix could read me like a book anyway. "Daisy has been talking behind your back again," I huffed. Nix was always there to listen when things got ugly between the other girl and me. And I knew he’d never fight with her as she was a girl. Boys didn’t hit girls. At least they weren’t supposed to. For some reason, Dalton hadn’t gotten that message. I’d seen him hit Daisy, too, and they were blood relations.
Nix’s chest lifted and fell as he grunted. "What’s the evil little witch been saying now?" he asked, cracking his knuckles; something he did a lot.
I itched my nose with my good hand and grimaced. "Stuff about kissing you."
"Really?" He sounded surprised.
"Yep, I think it's revolting."
"Thanks," Nix huffed with a roll of his shoulders, sounding upset.
"What?" I didn't understand what I'd said. I chewed the inside of my cheek, mentally kicking myself as he was probably embarrassed by talking about kissing with a girl.
After a moment’s silence, his next words surprised me.
"You think kissing me would be revolting?" I couldn't tell whether he was teasing or not.
"I didn't mean it like that," I told him in a hushed voice. It suddenly felt strange talking about such things with Phoenix. We were friends, and the thought of kissing anyone had never entered my head until Daisy started shooting her mouth off. She had made me feel uncomfortable and another unrecognizable emotion. One that made me want to punch the taller girl in the face.
She and Dalton were fourteen, but she looked older. She even had boobs. They were small, but they were there. I was flat like a pancake. Not that it bothered me. Boobs were weird, like two lumps of fat, and I hoped I never grew any.She’d also gotten her period, something else that she’d taunt me about, as I hadn’t yet. Daisy called me ugly and made fun of my ginger hair and freckles. She also poked at me by stating I was immature for my age all the time.
"How would you know anyway?" Nix suddenly asked, his tone telling me he was still cross. I flinched as he cracked his knuckles. Something he did a lot.
"What do you mean?"
His dark eyes scanned my face before he replied. "Well, you've never kissed me. How would you know whether it's revolting or not?" Nix said, shifting on the roof, so he faced me. I straightened my legs and turned toward him. He’d lightened up a bit, and I felt relieved. Hurting Phoenix was something I never wanted to do.
"I don't, I suppose."
"OK. So, why don't we try it, and then you can prove your theory—or not?" Nix always used clever words. He was smart. He didn’t even need to try at school.
As I considered his point, my eyes lingered on his mouth. It was the softest thing on his face.
Nix had a point, and science was now my best subject since I started sixth grade. I loved the practical experiments we did at school.
"OK. I'm in if you are," I chuckled with a meaty grin. Nix mirrored my expression. He, too, was keen to know the outcome of our test.
We both pushed up onto our knees and got comfortable. Nix placed his hands gently on my shoulders, and the height difference forced my head back.
"OK. Close your eyes," he whispered, his minty scent flowing through my hair. Nix was a gum chewer, and his breath always smelled nice, unlike Dalton, who ate way too much candy. He already had four fillings in his teeth. I’d heard his sister taunting him about that one day when he called her Fugly.
As I digested his words, I asked. "Why?" You wouldn’t usually experiment with your eyes closed. It could be dangerous.
"That's what you’re supposed to do. You see it in the movies all the time." Ah, of course. Silly me. I remembered how Sandy and Danny would kiss in Grease. It was the last movie I watched with my mother before she died.
Nix's face was relaxed as I closed my eyes. "That’s it. Now drop your shoulders."
I took a deep breath and waited, a strange bubble of excitement in my belly. That must have been because I enjoyed experiments so much. I didn’t know what to do with my hands, so I kept them by my sides.
I felt Nix's palms on my cheeks, holding my jaw, and then his lips gently touched mine. My breath snagged in my throat. They were soft and warm and not revolting at all. Quite nice. He kept his mouth there and pressed against me, and my legs went gooey. I felt that kiss from my fingertips all the way down to my toes.
I enjoyed being connected to him, our skin touching ever so slightly. His fresh boyish smell invaded my space, but I liked it. Our lips remained fused, and Nix’s thumbs stroked my face.
It felt magical, and my heart started to race in my chest.
