“I saw you were thinking about him. Call me telepathic.”
“Telepathic? You must be.”
Josh shakes his head. “There was a way you’d look at Heath, then look down at the table, feeling all, I dunno.” He takes my hand and strokes his thumb across my knuckles. “School-girly. You did the same thing just now. I saw you. Memories.”
“I do the same thing with you.” I grin. “I must do. I get butterflies around you all the damn time.”
He nods, slowly. “Yeah, I get a whole rainbow of incredible expressions from you, all for me. But we all have certain looks we share with certain people. Certain people that are special to us, don’t we? There is no one size fits all.”
I know what he means.
It’s not a competition and it never would be. Heath is special for being Heath. We both have our special ways of interacting with him.
And being out here, with De Chante… feeling safe in this space, even though I’m around plenty of strangers…
It’s great. It’s amazing.
It would just be so incredibly amazing if our missingspecialcould share it with us. It’s been a long, long time.
“I’ve been thinking,” Josh says, before our starters arrive. “With you sprinting back to your confidence, and with the reassurance Orla has given you, I reckon that next time,ifthere is a next time, should be time to click accept.”
The hairs on the back of my neck feel like static bristles. My heart starts thumping.
“You’ll click accept? If Heath sends a proposal?”
Josh nods. “That’sifhe sends a proposal. And it might be to you, not to me. Who knows?”
I know. In my heart of hearts, I know.
It’s Josh that Heath will be sending a proposal to, and there will be one. No doubt about that.
“What do you think?” Josh asks me. “Do you think it’s time? It’s your call as much as mine.”
I laugh, squeezing my cheerleader’s hand.
“You are a far better judge of timing than I am.” I look around the room. “You were the one who got me out here, being me, drinking champagne in this amazing place. You make the call. When it’s time. How it’s time. What it’s time for.”
He nods. “Ok. But right now, the time is all about us, so let’s get ready to enjoy some burrata bruschetta and celebrate our first night of freedom in the great outdoors.”
I raise my glass of champagne again.
“To the great outdoors, and the man who got me here.”
“To the woman who makes it shine.”
Our meal is a delight. Fun, and chatter, and amazing food as we drink another bottle of De Chante after the first.
I’m grinning on the walk back to the Airbnb, at ease with the streets and the few passersby, because it’s ok.
Right now, it’s all ok.
No flashing cameras. No harassment of everyone I know. No hate filled comments online, spewing in my direction.
Josh has the key in the front door when a distinctive notification alert sounds out from my handbag.
A proposal.
We look at each other, despite our sensibilities, because it would be so synchronistic if it was Heath. So crazily fated, it would be unreal.
