“Oops,” I say again, and scoop up a handful of the delicious icing. I put my plate down on the floor, and smear the icing over both tits before licking my fingers clean.
I get up on my knees and present my chocolatey tits to them. “I think I’ll need cleaning up before I go. Any volunteers?”
No words, just silly grins as the two loved-up guys get down on the floor with me. Two loved-up guys lapping and sucking on both tits at once and I moan at the pleasure.
And my heart sings for them once my tits are clean and they grin at each other with chocolate covered mouths before embracing and kissing and licking each other clean. Fun indeed.
“That was crazy good,” Barney says, licking his lips.
“Maybe we’ll ask Holly back for Christmas,” David says.
“Holly at Christmas works for me,” David says.
“Me too,” I tell them. “You know where to find me.”
After getting dressed, I wrap my arms around them as though I’ve known them for years when it’s time to say goodbye, thanking them for a wonderful time. I’m smiling to myself as I walk down the street to the cab, and send myD&Smessage through to Josh.
And that’s when I get a stab from nowhere. Right in the guts. No butterflies, no rollercoaster of emotion, just a hardcore jab of pain. Of loss.
Magnifique!
I can’t banish it from my mind this time, just stare out of the cab window on the way back to the Airbnb with the tears rolling free down my face. Because there is no denying it now. No ignoring the obvious. The trigger has been too much.
Two guys being so loved up in front of me, adoring each other with such open hearts…
Fucking me with such heat, and want, and care…
Suchloveall the way through the lust.
I miss Heath so bad it’s savage.
CHAPTER NINE
It’s pointless trying to play things down when I arrive back at the Airbnb. Josh sees through my ‘chilled’ facade the very moment he sets eyes on me.
“What is it?” he asks, and his arms are around me before I’ve even kicked my pixie boots off. “Was something wrong with the proposal? Did something happen on the way back?”
I shake my head. “No, no, nothing at all.” I fight the lump in my throat. “And that’s the thing. The proposal tonight was so good. It was sonice.”
He keeps hold of my shoulders as he pulls away, his stare digging into mine.
“Two guys. A celebration…” He pauses, weighing it up. “I imagine it was quite a loving one.”
“Yeah, it was amazing. They are so in love. So secure. So…” My breath hitches. “And it reminded me of… it reminds me of.” I choke as I try to speak. “And I just miss him, you know? I miss you and him. I miss…”
“Shh,” Josh says and rocks me in his arms. “I know, I know. I miss him, too.”
Josh maintains his composure as I lose mine, his body so firm when mine falls apart. Just like always. Just like it has beensince Cannes. He’s such a protector and I love him so much for it.
“What are we going to do?” I ask him. “We can’t lose him for ever, can we? What if we never see him again?”
Josh stiffens at that. “For ever is a long time. We just have to focus on the here and now. You are only just back on your feet, and you’re doing really well. You’re making strides every single day. Worrying about Heath is down the road yet. It’s not the time.”
I push Josh back, taking a deep breath before I carry on.
“You’re lying to yourself,” I say. “You’re denying yourself the pain to protect me from mine. I know you are.”
He blinks, and his lip trembles, just a touch.
