I glance down at my grease-smeared jeans and T-shirt.My work boots are scuffed, and I’ve never done more than comb my hair after I get out of a shower.
Zoey’s ex is on the opposite end of the spectrum from me, and I can’t help comparing myself to him.
Is that what she goes for?The well-dressed corporate type?
I barely stop myself from swiping a grimy hand across my forehead, grimacing at the black marks on my fingers I’ve never noticed before.
I’ll never be like that.Not in a million years.
But I can at least make sure to clean myself up before I track her down again.Maybe swing by the store to get some more shirts without holes in them.Anything to get her to give me a chance as a man.After that, we can deal with the wolf.
“This was not a date.I am not going to fall in love with you, Warner Jameson.”
She didn’t tell me to stay away from her.She didn’t say she didn’t want to know me.In fact, her statements almost seemed like she was trying to convince herself of them, not me.
Zoey Gunner is a challenge.She’s long-term.
She’s already crawling under my skin, melding herself into my thoughts of the future.
What would it be like to have Zoey as my mate?
A partner.My own person, who I can rely on and take care of and laugh with and hold.
I’m suddenly tipsy from wanting.
The idea brings into stark relief the emptiness in my chest I try to ignore.But with Zoey in my mind, I can’t help thinking about how much I long to be needed.
All my life, I’ve been the extra.
When my dad died, Mom stood on her own, never looking for comfort from her children, only trying to be a constant rock for us.Where the fatherly duties were left open, Uncle Mason stepped in.There was no space for me there.In other families, it might have fallen to me to care for the younger siblings, but Roderick took the reins on that, along with the needs of the entire pack.Plus, Tanya and Isaac have always had each other.
People around town like me.They think I’m charming and good for a laugh or a friendly favor.
But no one has everneededme.
Could Zoey?
12
ZOEY
The Pine Falls Public Libraryhas officially made it into my list of top five places to work remotely.I’m not sure anything will beat McConnell’s Pub in Denver, where they make sure to give me a table in the corner, near an outlet, and they always have a new beer on tap for me to sample.
At least, they did until I realized how drinking affected my medication.Now, the staff is just as quick with a Dr.Pepper and a basket of cheese fries.
Maybe a library is a better choice than a pub.
Plus, there’s a cute coffee shop just down the block that makes those frothy drinks with delicious syrups added.The only way I can consume coffee is if it’s halfway to becoming a milkshake.One more way I’m the black sheep in my family.Or more like they’re a herd of black sheep drinking black coffee, and I’m the super-fluffy white sheep that insists on wearing a pink bow while it sips on a foamy Almond Joy latte.
I finish off my delicious drink as I put the final touches on a style sheet for my new client.After saving and sending it to the Denver brewery that hired me to design their website, I lean back in my chair, enjoying the sun on my face.
This small-town library has a patio that overlooks a river.The water meanders by at a leisurely pace, splashing against rocks to create the perfect background white noise.My bet is that the crashing of waves was louder during the summer when the banks were swollen with snow melt.But as the temperature drops, so does the water level.
Satisfied with my work for the day, I take one last wistful look at the full Wi-Fi signal before shutting my laptop and sliding it into my bag.
Time to head back to the cellular service wasteland that is my grandmother’s cabin.
At least there’s electricity and a water heater.Have to be thankful for the small things.
