I take a deep inhale then exhale slowly.Not today. I will not go there today.As I repeat these words, his all-consuming smile haunts me, but I don’t give in. I repeat this over and over in my head until I can at least somewhat regain focus. Usually, this works—but ironically,not today.
Realizing I need to face this alone and in private, I tell Joy I’m going to the bathroom—she seems more than content to keep Jasper company in the meantime. I flash the brightest smile I can muster, and my eyes flicker to his for just a second before diverting elsewhere, anywhere but here. I hustle to the bathroom, shut the door behind me, then continue repeating my mantra. I haven’t been here since he passed. I used to love visiting Aged Emporium with Kai. I thought I could handle this, but I must have overestimated myself.
Not today. I will not go there today.
Twelve
Jasper
Idon’t need a guardian angel to tell me something is clearly wrong here. I can see it all over her face. Other people may fall for that bright smile, but I don’t—with or without Kai’s influence. She excuses herself to go to the bathroom, and before I can check on her, Joy steps up to the counter. In true Joy fashion, she already has a lot on her mind. I try to listen as she talks, but my thoughts are elsewhere.
“I see the way you’re reacting. You can see through it.” Kai appears next to me; if I didn’t know any better, I’d say he sounds taken aback.
“Anyone with eyes should be able to see,” I mumble, causing Joy to pause mid-sentence.Shit.
“I’m sorry?” she says, uncertainty lacing her tone.
“Anyone with eyes should be able to see how nice this piece is.” I point to a random ring in the display case. Of course, it happens to be a diamond engagement ring, which causes Kai to absolutely lose it. I bite my tongue.
“Oh wow, yes, that is so stunning! I would love a ring like that one,” she exclaims while looking into my eyes. “Hey, are you going to the Halloween party this weekend?”
I want to leave this conversation, but she isn’t easy to deter. “I didn’t know there was a party.” Maybe a party is just what I need to loosen up. I’ve been on edge since Kai started paying me unexpected visits. “What are the details?”
“‘What are the details?’How old are you again, bro? 50?” He snorts. My brows crease in frustration. She pulls her phone out, tapping on her screen and then I hear a ping from my phone.
“Just airdropped you the invite—don’t forget to dress up!” Now, it doesn’t feel like I have much of a choice on whether or not I attend. I wonder if Iris is going.Iris.My heart is pulling me to go check on her. I look around and see no trace of Kai.
“I’ll be right back, Joy. Feel free to start taking pictures or doing whatever you need to do—behind the counter is strictly off-limits, though.” I hastily walk away. As I get closer to the bathroom, I realize I have no idea what I’m doing. If Iris is upset, how will I comfort her without really knowing her?
Just as I’m about to knock, the door opens. To my surprise, she isn’t alone. As she stands in the doorway, Kai’s arms are wrapped around her shoulders tightly—he’s embracing her. She appears paler than earlier, but when she smiles at me now, it seems more… genuine. I haven’t seen this side of her guardian before. All the humor in his expression has vanished. Instead,his eyes remain closed as he seems to channel all his energy into Iris. He’s even glowing.
“What’s up?” she asks, all smiles now. This is a problem. She is too good at masking her emotions. It makes her nearly impossible to read. I, on the other hand, don’t see the point in hiding anything.
“You were gone for a while, and I thought I’d check on you. Are you okay?”
“Oh, yeah, I’m just feeling a little sick; it’s probably something I ate. I’m ready to get started! Where do you think we should take pictures first?” He lets her go and she begins to walk out of the bathroom toward the front entrance. It looks like Joy is already taking pictures, which is great because I feel like Iris needs more time to regain composure than she lets on. He follows us to the front, patting me on the shoulder.
Iris takes her AirPods out of her purse and puts them in her ears, then turns her Canon camera on. My eyes linger on her fitted white turtleneck that accentuates her curves and patterned loose pants. I haven’t ever really cared for turtlenecks—until now.
She and Joy have cameras wrapped around their necks. I didn’t dabble much with marketing, social media, or photography during my undergraduate studies, so I find this interesting. She begins perusing, stopping in several different spots to capture images. She gets far enough away for Kai and me to finally have a moment.
“So, how did that work exactly? The whole hugging thing?” I quietly ask.
“Oh, I just do that when she’s struggling. It’s not a permanent solution because I won’t always be here, but it usually helps her in the moment.” He assesses the old Vinyls hanging on the wall behind the front counter. “Jasper, are you a fan of rock music?"
"Um, yeah. Anyway, about Iris—"
"No way! I finally figured out something we have in common." He grins, holding up a "rock on" sign with his hand. I stifle a chuckle, looking down and shaking my head. "Okay, I can tell you're dying to know how the supernatural hug works. Basically, I funnel my golden energy into her—think of it like magical medicine. It provides her with some comfort, but not enough to raise suspicion, and unfortunately, it doesn’t work long term.”
“I’m curious—how long have you been her guardian? Did you have to do formal training or anything to secure the position?”
“I’ve been her guardian for years. As far as ‘securing the position’ goes—” He cracks a smile. “I was given the freedom to choose. I awoke in another realm after dying, which was wildly unexpected, I might add. An archangel greeted me and presented me with the choice. After choosing to become a guardian, I did some general training. Time works differently in the Middle Realm, so I’m not sure how long I trained for, but after refining my gifts and understanding my purpose, I ventured back to this realm and was assigned to Iris.”
“What is the other realm like?” I can’t help but find all of this fascinating.
“You’ll see it one day,” he affirms. “It won’t do you much good to know what exactly comes after this life while you’re living it. If you know all the details, living in the moment will be harder. Trust me.”
“Fair enough. Well, what can I actually do to help you and Iris?”
