“You okay?” Havoc asked as he pulled into the parking lot behind my bookstore.
I started to nod, but the look he gave me reminded me of our pact. I wouldn’t lie to him. “I can’t stop thinking about what that vexatious little piss ant said. This entire past year I thoughthewas the stupid one who’d screwed up. What ifIwas the stupid one, not even questioning why he pushed me away? I’ve never considered Wesley a threat. With a few well-placed rumors and well-made alliances, I used to be able to take anyone down. But what if hewasjust playing me the whole time?”
Havoc stared at me for a few minutes before climbing out of his truck and circling around to open my door. He hoisted me down, shut the door, and then leaned me against it. I was trapped between his big hot body and the side of the truck.
“I’m gonna kiss you now,” he said. “Okay?”
Shocked, I stared at him. Kiss me? Uh… “Okay.”
He rested a hand on either side of my head and leaned in. I closed my eyes and welcomed his warm lips. As I opened up to him, his body pressed against me. He stroked the inside of my mouth, silently delivering promises I knew the growing bulge pressed against my stomach could deliver. His big, muscular body surrounded me, overpowering all my thoughts and senses with warmth and want. All I could see, hear, feel, taste, or think about was Havoc, and I reveled in how safe and protected his presence made me feel. But all too soon, he pulled away.
“How’s your mind now?” he asked, pressing his erection harder against me.
All thoughts of Wesley had evaporated in a cloud of need and instinct. “Unnecessary,” I replied. I didn’t need a brain for the things I wanted to do to Havoc. For the things I wanted him to do to me.
“Want me to come up?” he asked with a smirk. If my panties weren’t so damp from his kiss, that sexy, knowing smirk would have set them on fire. His hand cupped the side of my face and his thumb stroked my bottom lip. “I could keep that mind of yours preoccupied.”
Instinct told me I should be playing hard to get or flirting or something, but it was my turn to try this no lies, no games, no bullshit approach. “Yes. I would like that very much.”
Havoc grinned and gave me one more kiss before releasing me and following me into my apartment. The distance between us cooled down my body, calmed my libido, and jump-started my nerves. Having never been with anyone other than Wesley (and that was over a year ago), I had no clue what to expect. Havoc was little more than a stranger, and probably the closest thing to a real friend I’d ever had. It was a weird combination and I didn’t know how to proceed. I needed his body. The attraction between us was too strong to deny. I wanted to do all the beautiful, dirty things I read about in my romance novels with him, but I also didn’t want this to be a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am situation. If I let him fuck me, would I ever see him again?
Could I let him walk out of my life?
The idea of it was staggeringly painful, which made no sense at all. I needed to numb that shitty feeling and muster up some courage, so I headed for the kitchen. “Can I get you a drink?” I asked.
“Sure. What do you got?”
Looking over the contents of my refrigerator, I replied, “How about rum and guava?”
“Never had it.”
“It’s like a tropical paradise in your mouth. Complete with sexy pirates, and I’ll decorate it with one of those cute little umbrellas.”
He chuckled. “Babe, I got a rep to uphold. I’ll try the drink, but pass on the pirates and umbrellas.”
“Spoil sport. Make yourself comfortable. I’ll be out in a minute.” I pulled glasses out of the cupboard, made us each a drink, sucked down half of mine, refilled it, and headed out to the living room.
Havoc was lounging on my sofa, looking far sexier than any man had a right to. He’d removed his shoes, tie, and shirt, and a tight white tank undershirt was stretched across his impressive pecks and abs in a drool-worthy display of hotness. As I checked him out, he gave me that knowing smirk again.
“You said to get comfortable.”
Yes. Yes, I had, and oh boy was I enjoying the eye candy that request had produced. I handed him his drink and then took another giant gulp of my own before shedding his suit jacket. The liquor was already warming me up and dampening my inhibitions. I slipped off his jacket and hung it over the back of the recliner before sucking down more of my drink.
“How’re you doing?” he asked, eyeing my glass as he sipped from his own. He patted the cushion beside him. “You seem keyed up. Sit. Talk to me.” He took another sip. “This shit isn’t bad.”
No, it was good. Strong. Perfect. My buzz was already coming back, and soon I’d be good to go, ready to make rash decisions I’d most likely regret tomorrow in a desperate attempt to feel better tonight. I drained the rest of my glass and stood. “I’m gonna make another.”
I turned to go back into the kitchen, but Havoc grabbed my hand, halting my progress. “No, babe. You’re not getting shit-faced.”
Who the hell was he to cut me off in my own house? Before I tell him to mind his own business and take advantage of me like he should, he tugged me down onto his lap. “You’re nervous. I get that. But if you let me, I can make you feel better.” The back of his hand trailed up my bare arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake. As his hard cock pressed against my backside, he slowly pulled the pins out of my hair, releasing it in a cascade of curls. His eyes darkened, and his fingers ran through my hair and trailed down my bare back as his lips landed on mine. He grabbed my arms and held me still, kissing my breath away. His hands continued to roam my body, sliding down my cleavage, kneading my breasts, slipping under my dress and to climb my thighs to my hot, wet core. Pushing aside my thong, he teased my clit and I moaned into his mouth. With his fingers still dancing over my sensitive area, he pulled back and met my gaze, his expression dangerous. It sent a thrill up my spine and more heat to my core.
“I can help you, Jules.”
He’d already done so much, yet, I would gladly accept more. “How?”
“I’ll make you scream my name so many times you’ll forget his.” He plucked the glass from my hand and set it down on the coffee table. “But only if you’re sober. We’re not doing this if you’re wasted.”
I swallowed and looked away from his soul-consuming stare. “And afterward? I know it’s lame, but you’re… I’ve really enjoyed spending time with you, and…” My god, I sounded so weak! I wanted to kick myself, but instead snapped my mouth closed, hoping I didn’t screw this up.
