I went through the rest of the funeral in a daze, shaking hands and thanking people for coming the way I’d been trained to do. They looked at me different now, like the death of my old man and the crippling of my brother had turned me into a goddamn king. I didn’t want any of it, but whenever I’d start looking for the exits, my gaze would find Annetta. Seated in the second pew, holding our sleeping child, her reassuring smile gave me the strength to keep going.
When the funeral wrapped up, Annetta and I followed the hearse to the graveside to lay my old man to rest. As he was lowered six feet under, I knew I should feel something, but all I felt was cold. Buttoning my coat, I reflected on the man in the box. The bastard had never been much of a father to me. I couldn’t imagine forcing Angel to beat the shit out of his younger brother while I stood there and watched. What the fuck was wrong with him? Determined to do better—to be better—I tucked my wife and son under my arm.Wewould be different.
After the graveside service, we headed to my parents’ house for a family potluck. Homemade dishes of every sort covered the bar and table as people huddled in groups, talking about my old man like he was some sort of legend. I drifted around the room, catching stories of his exploits. He’d stolen a cop car, peed on an electric fence, botched a robbery, got so drunk he passed out naked in a night club. The man they spoke of sounded fun and a little wild. I wish I could have known him, rather than the asshole I’d grown up fearing.
As the potluck came to an end, women collected their dishes as the men approached me. The first of which, was Mamma’s cousin Gus. Gus had to be approaching his seventies, which made him a relic among mobsters.
“It was a respectable service,” he said, shaking my hand.
“Thank you for coming, Gus.” I replied. “It was good to see you and your family. It’s been too long.”
When was the last time I’d seen Gus? He hadn’t come to Michael or Abriana’s weddings. When I’d become a made man, maybe?
“We don’t get out much anymore. Rarely see a reason for it.” He leaned closer and lowered his voice. “I don’t mean to speak ill of the dead, but I never much cared for your old man. He wasn’t a Mariani, and never should have been leading this family.”
Stunned, I held my tongue.
“But you… You’re a Mariani, son, and I have all the confidence in the world you’ll do everything you can to see this family prosper.” He clapped me on the back. “That’s what Marianis do. You need anything, you come and see me, you hear?”
I said the only thing I could think of. “Thank you, Gus.”
He smiled and walked away.
Mamma’s cousin Manuel came next, and basically told me the same thing. Manuel was followed by Luca, after Luca, came Allessio, as Allessio left, a line formed. Every single man shook my hand, revealed their dislike for my father, and assured me I’d do better.
By the time I packed Annetta and Angel into the car and drove away from Mamma’s, there was no doubt in my mind that the family had accepted me as the new capo, a job I’d never wanted but was now stuck with. Looking for advice, I dropped Annetta and Angel off at home and went to the hospital to visit Michael.
Although this wasn’t my first visit, it still stunned me to see my brother lying in bed and hooked to machines. He smiled when he saw me, shooing away the nurse who was taking his vitals.
“How was the service?” he asked once we were alone.
“Respectable.” At least that’s what everyone had called it.
Michael chuckled, no doubt understanding why I’d used that word.
“How are you feeling?” I asked.
“Feeling? They got me hopped up on so much dope I can’t feel a damn thing. I pissed myself earlier. Didn’t even feel it.”
I laughed, glad to see him in such good spirits.
“How’s Zeta taking it?” I asked.
“Honestly? I think she’s relieved.”
“Relieved?” I asked, surprised. “You’ll never be able to walk again.”
“Yeah, but I’ll be home at night now. She said she’s looking forward to that, especially with the baby on the way.”
I sat in the chair beside my brother’s bed. This was the first time we’d been alone since the accident and I had so much to say to him, but no clue how to start. I used to be able to tell Michael anything, but over the past few years, he’d turned into my boss rather than my brother. Now he was lying in the bed Adamo Pelino had intended for me, forced to be my brother again.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I know I can’t ever make up for it, but I’m sorry I asked you to go to the Pelinos that night. It was my responsibility.”
“You didn’t shoot me, Dom,” Michael replied.
“Yeah, but had I gone—”
“Then maybe you’d be dead, and you sure as shit wouldn’t have been able to nail Adamo between the eyes like I did. You’re nowhere near as good a shot as me.”
