Brooks isnevernervous.
So I cross to him and take his hand in mine, lift it to my lips.
“I’ve lived there for fifteen years,” he says quietly, and my gaze whips up to his. “Every house I’ve ever bought was done with you in mind.”
I wrinkle my forehead, doing the math. “But fifteen years?—”
“Yeah, baby. That last day, when the asshole manipulated you into going back to Seattle?”
I can’t force any words over the huge lump that’s formed in my throat, so I just nod. That was the worst day of my life.
“I was going to propose to you that day.”
The world shifts beneath my feet, and I start to shake my head as pure anguish fills me. The pain is unlike anything I’ve ever felt before.
“I’d already bought the house,” he continues. His voice is so rough. Full of so much raw emotion. “It was a fixer-upper, but I planned to have it ready by the time you finished school for good and moved home.”
“Brooks.” My voice breaks on his name, and he scoops me against him, clinging to me almost desperately. “Fuck.”
“I was going to surprise you and take you to the house. I had flowers and balloons all over the place, thanks to the help of my mom and the rest of the family. Then we were going to have a little party at the ranch,” he says, peppering the top of my head with kisses.
No.
God, that’s all I’ve ever wanted.
“You begged me to stay.” I’m crying against his chest, unable to hold in the sobs, grieving what we both lost. “You told me that you needed me, and I was too blinded, too fucking overwhelmed?—”
“Hey, shh.”
“No, youshouldhate me.” I step out of his arms and walk across the room to the wide windows that look out over the backyard. There’s a concrete patio out there, where I would put a pergola and furniture andGod.“You should still hate me, Brooks. Shit,Ihate me.”
“No, stop it.” His hand grips my upper arm, and he turns me to him, then cups my face. “I’m so fucking over being angry, Jules. It consumed me for more than a decade. Besides, we were both at fault for how things went down.”
My face crumples again, and I close my eyes.
“I have you back with me, and I’m not going to feed into the anger or the frustration anymore. I’m just not. It was eating me alive. For whatever reason, it just wasn’t the right time for us, baby.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“Hey.” He tips my chin up and makes me look him in the eyes. I absolutelyhateseeing the tears in his beautiful hazel eyes. “I amnottelling you this to make you hurt, Wildfire. I don’t want you to hurt any more than you already have.”
“It’s fucking agony,” I reply, my lips quivering as every muscle in my body shakes with rage and despair. “I could have been your wife for all of these years. We could have had babies, and an amazing family, and?—”
“No more.” He shakes his head and leans in to rest his forehead to mine. He has to lean down so far, it would be laughable if I weren’t losing my mind with regret and sadness. “We can still have those things, baby.”
“We lost so much time.”
“And we have plenty ahead of us.” He wipes his thumbs under my eyes, clearing away the tears. “We need to stop dwelling on what we lost and focus on the fact that we found each other again, and this is just the beginning of an amazing life together.”
His voice holds so much conviction.
“You need to understand that I’m never letting you go again, Juliet.Never.You’re mine. If you want to live in the house that I bought for you fifteen years ago, that’s great with me. If you want me to gut and renovate this one for you, perfect. Let’s do it. I don’t care where we live as long as we’re theretogether, sleeping in our bed, with you in my arms.Because I’ve already endured this life without you, and I refuse to spend another minute in that fucking purgatory.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” I promise him, wrapping my arms around his neck. He easily lifts me into his arms, and I wrap my legs around his waist before he deposits me on the countertop. “I don’t care where we live, either. I just need to be with you because you’re the love of my life, Brooks. You’re the only one who makes sense, the only person I need.”
“Jesus, I needed to hear you say that.” He buries his face in my neck, and I push my fingers into his thick, dark hair. “I love you, baby. It’s always been you. Hell, I’d marry you today.”
I smirk at that, letting the love pouring from him fill my heart and smooth out all of the rough edges.
