‘Sorry.’ She shut the door firmly behind her, pushed it to make sure it was properly closed and then half-ran against the persisting snow to the black Range Rover.
‘Forgive you for what?’ was the first thing she asked as soon as Rocco was in the car, starting the engine.
‘For not obeying orders yesterday.’
Ella sighed. ‘You got along with my dad when I didn’t think you would. I thought I could control the situation but maybe that was just wishful thinking. Everything’s a muddle, and I thought it would be slightly less complicated if we kept a dividing line between you and my dad.’
She sat back and watched the dull, grey winter landscape go by as he manoeuvred the car away from the house and into the narrow lanes, taking it very, very slowly. She didn’t expect him to reach out and give her hand a reassuring squeeze.
She slid her glance sideways to see that he was staring ahead, focusing on the road. When he returned his hand to the steering wheel, her heart thumped, and she still wanted those warm fingers to be clasped with hers, steady and reassuring, smoothing away all the turmoil in her head.
‘He likes you,’ she added.
‘And that’s not a good thing?’
‘I suppose it’s…okay.’
Rocco burst out laughing and when he cast a dark glance in her direction, she blushed, taken back to the times they’d had when laughter had been in plentiful supply.
‘Just okay? Think about it, Ella, isn’t it a good thing that your father has been reassured that I’m the sort of guy who isn’t going to disappear in the face of the responsibilities that have come his way?’
‘You honestly didn’t have to pass the test with so many flying colours.’
‘I’ve never been a guy to do things by half-measures.’
‘You’ve met my dad now. What happens when I meet your parents, Rocco? What are they going to make of this situation? Or will you keep them in the dark from it?’
‘Keep them in the dark? That would be impossible.’
‘How are they going to react to the fact that we won’t be getting married, when they married because it made sense?’
Rocco’s mouth thinned. How would his parents react? He already knew how, because he had already had that conversation. There had been no point delaying the inevitable, but it wasn’t a conversation he had looked forward to, and it had gone as expected: a cold reception followed by an icy reminderof his uncle and what had happened when he had found himself trapped by a gold-digger.
‘And that waswithoutthe complication of a child!’ his mother had said in one of the few truly explosive reactions Rocco had ever heard.
Their cold fury had fired up a possessiveness inside him towards Ella which he had known was there without knowing just how powerful it was. Nothing about her could ever be described as greedy for money. Everything she said and did only confirmed that.
He felt her eyes on him and, for a split second, his heart opened up and warmed at feelings that lazily swirled inside him, defying logic. Logic said he wasn’t built for the highs and lows of love. Logic said that his uncle had been the benchmark of how a loss of control could ruin lives. Logic told him that to marry and yet keep a distance was the way the marriage would work and, better than that, would thrive. He wouldn’t pretend emotions that would never be there, and so she would never be disappointed because she couldn’t access them. But she would be satisfied on every other front.
‘I guess they would have expected you to get married to someone from the same social standing as you?’
‘I’m sure that’s exactly what they expected, but in life things don’t always go according to plan.’
‘They’ll be bitterly disappointed that not only will you not be marrying the right type of girl but that that wrong type of girl is pregnant with your baby.’
‘My parents’ opinion belongs to them,’ Rocco said, voice cooling as he thought about his parents. ‘I hope I can change it but, if I can’t, then I won’t let it affect me or how I behave in this situation.’
‘Really?’
‘I don’t have the same relationship you have with your father,’ Rocco said quietly. ‘I’ve looked at the interaction between the two of you. There’s no hiding the deep love that’s there, and I’m guessing your entire family unit was like this?’
‘It was,’ Ella agreed with a smile in her voice. ‘Conor may have been as wild as anything sometimes, and Mum may have been dogged with health issues, but there was so much love there. When you say you don’t have the same relationship…’
‘I think I may have given some hints on that particular topic when we…were together.’
‘Maybe.’
‘The details may have been omitted but all the necessary bits were there.’
