The look on Hallie’s face suggested she didn’t really believe that, as if she somehow knew there was no getting used to it. There was just existing in a constant state of panic. “Do you want me to kick their asses?”
Audrey laughed in surprise at Hallie’s words and her deadpan tone. She didn’t like Hallie’s chances against the rest of the family, but the offer was sweet. “That’s okay. I wouldn’t want you getting hurt.”
“Please, I’m running on righteous fury. Of course I’d win.”
Maybe that was true. A part of her did seem genuinely serious, like, if Audrey wanted to tear this whole thing down, she really would help. Why?
Audrey frowned. “You work with River, right?”
Hallie smiled, clearly not expecting the question, and tilted her head. “Yes. Why?”
“I don’t know. Just… the energy. My best friend works for a queer non-profit and you’ve got that same… help those who need it energy. Though, to be fair, working at an inn definitely requires helping people and jumping into stuff.”
Hallie turned so she could lean back against the railing, looking directly at Audrey as she stood up straighter again. “I was bullied a lot when I was a kid. Not a lot of queer kids where I went to school, and I was out and proud. I have brothers too—they’re just older in my case—and they stepped up, stepped in to help me. Not to fight my battles, but to stand alongside me. I know it’s easier to face things when someone does that with you. And I just can’t stand bullies.”
Audrey nodded. Zora had called her family bullies before. It hadn’t felt like this. Sure, there was the familiar desire to push back, to deny it hurt, to insist it wasn’t that bad and was all her fault, that it was just how her family showed love, but there was also the desire not to do that. As if insisting would somehow minimize what Hallie had been through. She knew bullying. If Audrey tried to change the definition of it… what would that mean?
“I’m sorry you went through that,” she told Hallie softly.
Hallie smiled. “It’s okay. And congratulations on not just insisting you aren’t being bullied. I know it’s hard not to do that.”
“Ah.” Audrey looked away, shuffling around on the balcony as she glanced across the frosty landscape.
“I also know other people who use temperatures to regulate.” Her voice was so understanding, so non-judgmental that Audrey didn’t know what to do with it. “Mostly sucking ice cubes or having really hot drinks, but I imagine it’s cold enough out here to be effective even if you don’t usually live in California.”
“Right.”
“I’m glad you have something that helps.”
Audrey nodded, looking back at her and trying desperately to keep her emotions shuttered behind her eyes. It made sense that River would be the only one in the family to fall for someone decent.
Zora’s earlier comments were no longer playing on Audrey’s mind. Over dinner, River and Hallie had seemed to settle into being around their family. They’d sat close, spoken to each other privately in the middle of the chaos. They’d looked good together. Happy.
Audrey was delighted for River. And, if someone else was going to be added to their family events, at least it was someone she could be real friends with, someone she could look forward to catching up with.
“Do you miss it when you’re gone?” Hallie asked after a long, quiet moment between them. “The cold, I mean.”
Audrey breathed a laugh. “A little. This is nicer than breathing into a cup of ice cubes. But I love California, too. And it’s great for work.” Not to mention far from her family.
Hallie smirked. “Right. Bugs. Guess you get more of them year-round there. They don’t get put on ice for the winter.”
“They do not.”
“Why—” Her question was cut off when the door to her room opened again and River stuck her head out, giving the pair of them a wild-eyed look.
“What are you doing out here? It’s freezing!” She rubbed her hands over her arms, hugging herself even though she hadn’t actually left the bedroom.
“Discussing bugs, believe it or not,” Hallie told her easily.
“Oh, I definitely believe that,” River laughed. “Audreylovesbugs.”
Audrey smiled, grateful that River never found that contradictory to her OCD like the rest of the family did.
“Yeah,” Hallie said, her voice quiet and curious as she looked up at Audrey again.
“But,” River said firmly, “perhaps you should save that conversation for the morning, indoors, when it’s warm.”
Audrey nodded, tearing her eyes from Hallie to River. “You’re right, of course. Too cold to be out here all night.” She wasn’t sure she really meant that.
