Trees of various heights and varieties surround us, and the sight never fails to make me smile. We plant new trees for every one that gets cut down. From the bushy Nordmann Firs, Frasier Firs, and the traditional Norwegian Spruce, among others.
Of course, we have pre-cut ones too, but in my opinion, there’s nothing like wandering through here and choosing your own. Thankfully, not everyone thinks like that, though, or we’d struggle to meet demands.
“Pete?” she prompts, snapping her fingers in front of my face.
“Sorry, zoned out for a minute.”
“No shit.” She walks over to stand in front of me. “Want to come home with me? Tim’s got a pork joint in the slow cooker. Plenty to go around.”
Jesus.
“Just because I live on my own, doesn’t mean I’m lonely all the time, you know.”
She rolls her eyes. “I never said it did. Can’t I invite my brother over for food now?”
“Sadie.” I place both hands on her shoulders. “I love you. You are the best sister a guy could ask for...”
She scowls. “I’m sensing abuthere.”
I grin. “But... we’ve just spent the last seven hours in each other’s pockets. I suspect both of us need a little space.”
“Hmm.”
I pull her into a hug and she wraps her arms around me. “Honestly, sis, I’m fine on my own.”
“I know you are. But I don’t like the idea of you rattling around in that house on your own. Especially this time of year.”
Her words hit their mark, even though she didn’t intend them to, and I swallow down the pang of longing. Would it be nice to have someone waiting for me at home? Yeah, of course. But I’ve tried looking farther afield these past few months and it just hasn’t worked out. If I’m honest, I need a break from trying—and failing—to find someone. “Maybe I should get a dog instead.”
She laughs and slaps my shoulder. “As well. Not instead.” When she pulls back to face me, she’s got a determined look in her eyes that never ends well for me. “There’s someone out there for you, Pete. You just need to find them.”
“Oh, is that all I need to do?” I dodge out of range before she can pinch me.
“I know it’s not as easy as that.”
“Do you?”
“Yes.” She links her arm through mine and steers us towards the car park. “I don’t want you to give up looking, that’s all.”
“I haven’t. I promise,” I add when she raises an eyebrow. Her expression tells me she’s not convinced. With a sigh, I share more than I usually would. “I’m tired, Sadie.” I scrub a hand over my face, the words truer than I’d like. “I’m thirty-six years old.”
“I’m two years older than you, so choose your next words carefully.”
That makes me smile. “You’ve been with Tim for four years.” I shrug. “Sometimes I feel like maybe finding someone isn’t the problem.” The next breath I let out is a little shaky as I admit something that’s been playing on my mind a lot recently. “MaybeI’mthe problem.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
I shrug again, uncomfortable. But Sadie and I are close. Always have been. If there’s anyone I can talk to about this, it’s her. “I’ve met people over the years. But none of them stick around. There’s got to be a reason for that.”
“There is. They were all arseholes.” There’s no room for argument in her tone, and it makes me pull her in for another hug. Her head fits under my chin and I kiss the top of it.
“You have to say that because you’re my sister.”
“It’s also true.”
“No, it’s not.” Some were, granted, but not all of them. “Whether it’s the fact I live out in the sticks, that I’m not interested in moving, or that I run a Christmas tree farm and garden centre?—”
“Jointly run,” she interrupts, poking me in the ribs. “You don’t do it on your own, dick.”
