Nathan focused on Jared now, and whatever look Jared gave him in return seemed to strengthen his resolve because he stood a little straighter before continuing. “After they came back, there was a pack meeting to discuss what happened and plan our response to it. Killing almost a whole unit couldn’t go unavenged. Our alpha at the time was… well, he wasn’t Cam, and towards the end, the lives of his pack became less important than exacting immediate revenge.” Nathan swallowed, and Seb found himself leaning forward a little, silently urging him to continue. “Cam was a family friend at the time. He warned me to stay away from the meeting—I was devastated about my parent’s death, but also very angry at everyone, and as the sole survivor of the patrol, Alec took the brunt of it.” The heavy sigh Nathan let out made his impressive shoulders sag. “I stormed into that room, accusing Alec of letting them die. How could he possibly have got away when no one else did? In front of the whole pack, I said he probably ran at the first sign of trouble. Cam pulled me out of there before I actually used the wordcoward, but I’d as good as called him it anyway.”
“Nathan.” Jared’s tone was soft and comforting, and Seb figured from the way he immediately stood and went to wrap his arms around his mate, calling another shifter a coward was a big fucking deal. “What happened then?”
Although muffled against Jared’s shoulder, Nathan was loud enough for Seb to hear. Just.
“Nothing. I should have been punished. By rights, Alec could have challenged me to a fight for what I said, but Cam intervened. Cam said I was young and grief-stricken, that my parents’ death had made me act without thinking, and I couldn’t be held responsible for my actions. I was let off with a warning. Our alpha told Cam to take me home and talk some sense into me, warn me how lucky I’d been, and above all to keep me away from any future pack meetings.”
Seb waited for Jared to step back a bit. Then he said, “If your alpha accepted you’d said all that because you were too upset to think clearly, why didn’t Alec?”
“I don’t know. Maybe he would have if I’d ever apologised.”
Oh.
Jared slipped his hand around Nathan’s. “Why didn’t you?”
Seb had been thinking the exact same thing, but knowing what he did of Nathan, he suspected he already knew the answer.
Nathan tugged Jared close again and wrapped him in his arms. “Because for a long time I wasn’t sorry. And by the time I could look at the whole thing rationally—Alec was many things, but a coward wasn’t one of them—it was too late.” He buried his face in the crook of Jared’s neck. The heavy exhale that followed sounded loud in the sudden quiet of the room. “And here we are ten years later, just about managing to be civil to each other.”
At the risk of getting his head bitten off, Seb ventured, “You could always try apologising now, see if it makes a difference.”
Nathan laughed but there was little humour in it. “I don’t think Alec would believe me if I said it now.”
Jared pulled back and looked him in the eye. “Do you even want to?”
“I don’t know. He might not be a coward, but he can be an arrogant dick who’s made it crystal clear what he thinks of me. I’m not sure if I could get the words out now, even if he’d listen.”
Seb kept his thoughts to himself. It wasn’t as though it really concerned him anyway; he’d been curious, that was all. He yawned, his body remembering how tired he’d been earlier before Nathan’s story time.
Jared glanced over at him, then patted Nathan on the chest. “Come on. Let’s leave Seb to catch up on his beauty sleep.”
The heated look Nathan gave him in return made it obvious where they were going.
Seb sighed. “Shut the door on your way out, please.”
As soon as they were gone and the door clicked shut, Seb shuffled down until his head hit the pillows. He idly wondered if the Nathan-Alec thing was common knowledge. It must be if Nathan had said what he did in front of the whole pack.
Seb’s mind then wandered to Tim. Had he been in the pack then? Seb had no idea. In fact, he didn’t know much about Tim at all.
And now I’m not going to, either. Which is fine. Perfect.
He closed his eyes and tried not to think of dark curly hair and blue eyes.
For all his fatigue, sleep was a long time coming.
Chapter Six
As Tim climbed the stairs to his flat, a familiar scent greeted him. He didn’t strictly need to live in Alec’s building, since he wasn’t part of his unit, but he’d chosen Alec as his beta, so it made sense. And it let him be closer to Cam in case—and he hoped it never came to it—anything ever happened to Cam that required Tim’s services.
He opened the stairwell door to find Alec leaning against the wall next to Tim’s flat. “Everything all right?” Tim unlocked the door and Alec followed him inside.
“I’ve just come from seeing Cam.”
“Oh?” Tim walked through to the kitchen and set his keys on the worktop. Although he counted Alec as a close friend, it wasn’t usual for Alec to discuss pack business unless it was common knowledge already. Alec wasn’t a gossip, and whatever he and Cam discussed stayed between them. For him to bring it up, it must involve Tim somehow. “Drink?” he asked, turning to open the fridge.
“Coke, if you’ve got any?”
Tim fetched out two cans and passed one over.
