CHAPTER SEVEN
Alex watched Riley head upstairs, and with every step he took, the wrongness in Alex’s chest intensified.
Something was definitely eating at Riley. Alex’s gut feeling had to be wrong, because if he didn’t know better, he’d say Riley was jealous. That stupid bitchy comment about the barman wasn’t Riley’s usual style, especially not where Alex was concerned. They laughed about shit like that. Took the piss out of each other? Definitely. Especially since, in Alex’s opinion, Riley had shitty taste in men. But they were never mean, and Riley’s voice had had a cold edge to it that Alex didn’t much care for.
The more he thought about it, the way Riley had bitched and then stomped off to bed in a huff screamed jealousy. Butwhy?
Not that he would ever say so, because then he’d sound like a dick, but Alex got chatted up a lot. Riley would too if he didn’t carry around that fuck-off air about him all the time. Guys noticed him; those broad shoulders were hard to miss. Couple that with a sexy smile and stunning blue eyes, and no wonder people looked twice at him.
But Riley had a chip on his shoulder, regardless of his attempts to deny it and act otherwise. After that one drunken confession, Alex knew what insecurities lurked beneath the surface. Riley was far too conscious of his size and his teeth, and Alex had long since given up trying to convince him that he was perfect as he was. The trouble was he’d always compared himself to Alex as they grew up, and that was fucking stupid. They had totally different builds. Alex was in a swimming club when they were younger—he still tried to go swimming as often as he could—and as a result he was fit with hardly any fat. Skinny, if he was honest, which wasn’t necessarily a good thing. Riley was heavier set, but it suited him. He kept himself fit playing footy, but in his mind he didn’t have Alex’s six-pack and therefore wasn’t as attractive. Which was bollocks.
If Riley stopped being so defensive, he’d see that plenty of attention was aimed his way when they went out. At one time it used to piss Alex off no end, but he’d got over that. Now he just wanted to see Riley happy, and for the last couple of weeks, he hadn’t been.
After tonight, the thoughts in Alex’s head were taking a direction he didn’t want to pursue. Not again. He’d worked hard to get back to thinking of Riley as just his best friend and nothing more. The what-ifs had almost driven him mad last time when he’d been too young and scared to actually come out and tell Riley how he felt. At the time, he’d assumed Riley would just know, and the fact that Riley hadn’t so much as looked at him differently told Alex that he didn’t think of him in that way.
And so Alex buried it deep. Riley’s subsequent relationship with Michael had helped with that—Alex hated him, and he and Riley hadn’t spoken to each other for a good few weeks during that period.
He sighed, let his head rest back on the sofa, and closed his eyes, only then noticing the room was oddly quiet. When he opened one eye and took a peek to the side, he caught Abi, Nick, and Jake staring at him. “What?”
“Nothing.” Abi shook her head; Nick glanced down at his hands.Weird.
The bathroom door upstairs closed softly and Jake immediately stood. “Okay, I’m knackered, too. Gonna head up to bed.” He stalked off and up the stairs in a hurry.
Alex narrowed his eyes as he looked at the others.
Dylan sat on his other side, eyelids almost closed as he focused on the TV, but Abi and Nick were still looking his way. Not that he had any intention of voicing his thoughts about Riley to any of his friends—that was something private and still under consideration—but maybe he could talk round it. Anyway, he wasn’t ready to call it a night yet, his mind far too active for sleep, and part of him wanted to know if anyone else thought Riley was acting strange. But he would do it without asking outright.
Ignoring Dylan, who was virtually asleep anyway, he shuffled round the sofa nearer to Nick and Abi. “You two live in shared houses. What’s the rent like? Do you reckon me and Ri can afford somewhere, or am I being unrealistic?”
Nick eyed him as though he knew exactly what Alex was trying to do, so Alex ignored him and focused on Abi.
She took a sip of her beer and sighed. “Well, if you’re serious about this and think you and Riley can live together without falling out, then—”
“Why would we fall out?” He frowned. “I’ve known him forever. I’m not sure there’s anything left to fall out about.” Argue, yes. Not speak for a few days? Probably. But fall out to the point of things getting awkward? Never. Even with the crushing disappointment of realising Riley didn’t return his feelings, Alex had never contemplated not being his friend.
Abi fidgeted in her seat. “No, I just meant….” She looked to Nick, but he had his eyes fixed firmly on the TV.
Arching an eyebrow, Alex sat forward and rested his elbows on his knees. “What?”
She sighed again. “Living together is a whole different thing to being best friends. I just meant that sometimes being in that close proximity can bring things to the surface that you maybe hadn’t noticed before.”
“Such as?” Alex was pretty sure she didn’t mean bad habits, even though they both had plenty of those.
Flushing slightly, she shrugged. “I don’t know, justthings.”
“Oh,things. Thanks for clearing that up.”
She laughed then and Alex grinned at her. Abi clarified. “Look, as long as you sit down and discuss what you both want out of this and make sure you’re on the same page, then I’m sure everything will work out fine.”
Why did he get the feeling she wasn’t talking about rent or anything practical like that? Maybe he should have just asked outright, this cryptic bollocks made his head hurt.
After elbowing Nick in the ribs, Abi stood and pulled him up with her. “And on that note, we’re going to bed.”
Of course they were. Just when things were getting interesting. Probably for the best, though. He didn’t want to put his friends in a difficult position, and if they talked about this any longer, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from asking some awkward questions. “Night.”
Dylan decided to follow suit, and within the space of five minutes, Alex was alone downstairs. He stretched out on his back along the main part of the sofa and closed his eyes. The room was pleasantly warm still, and Alex let his mind wander, half dozing. He didn’t want to think about Riley and his weird behaviour lately, didn’t want to draw anything conclusive that might force him to address feelings he’d long since put away. Moving out of his parent’s house and into a flat with Riley had seemed like a great idea, an answer to their problems, and Alex was damned if his overactive imagination was going to ruin it.
And that was all it was. He was seeing things that weren’t there. Nothing more. Too much beer had clouded his judgement, his brain dredging up wishful thoughts from a time best forgotten. In the morning he’d see things for what they were, and everything would be fine.
