“Why did my father want the death pills?” I ask sharply, goose bumps rising up my arms. It’s all giving me the same awful feeling that General Nolan put off after I completed the simulation.
Erik tilts his head and grins uncertainly as if he’s trying to get a read on me. My poker face is set, my guard up.
“Probably for the same reason we’re making it. To create soldiers who can withstand pain and continue to press on against all odds—until they collapse. Although, I bet Gregory was planning on selling them to his trade families for a fortune. We’ll be doing the same once we establish alliances within the families and they understand that Greg will be out of the picture.”
My stomach turns, but I don’t let even a muscle tick in my jaw.We can’t let this happen.We can’t let them do this, it would bring disorder to the entire world.
Cameron shifts uneasily, and the motion draws my attention back to the syringe in his hand.
“What’s with the black shot?” My gaze must be cold because Erik leans back in his chair and narrows his eyes at me.
“Series Z. It’s designed to be a last resort. The user will be essentially invincible for a period of time before expiring,” Erik says, and there’s a shadow that crosses his features.
Expiring seems to be literal.Death.
When neither Cameron nor I respond, Erik goes on. “Well, I’ll let you two be. I believe you and Cameron have some issues of your own to hash out.”
He stands and moves to the door, stopping only when I ask, “Did you know that Bryce was a spy?”
The room is so quiet that you can hear the old pipes creaking in the shitty paneled ceiling.
The lieutenant turns slightly, enough that he can cast a wary look over his shoulder. “Yes. I had my doubts, but that’s why I had Dominic place you and him on the same bracket for the final trial. I figured that if he was, he’d try to tell you then. He was a smart brat though. He took out nearly every camera the night before, but there were a few he missed. One of which caught Cameron trying to kill you. But we didn’t get Bryce’s death, or anything of relevance he told you.” He seems satisfied with my crushed expression and nods before exiting the room and shutting the door behind him.
A throb of exhaustion seeps into my consciousness and my neck is tingly in the spot of the injection. I rub it and let out a long exhale. “Can we pick this up tomorrow? I’m too tired to hear your side of it too.”
I thought I’d be ready to go over it all night with how furious I was earlier, but now that the dust has settled, there’s a profound sadness that’s drained out all of the rage from me.
Cameron looks tired too, the darkness beneath his eyes is heavy. He offers me a slight grin. “Yeah, I should get you to bed… First we need to get cleaned up though. I’m fucking drenched in sweat and dirt and whatever the fuck else.”
I crack a dry smile, it doesn’t reach any other part of me. “Okay.”
We move slowly through the basement. It’s not nearly as security driven or modern like the Dark Forces headquarters is. There are no windows, and the lack of having multiple ways out of here makes me uneasy.Only one exit for a reason.The thought is quickly dashed away before I let it seep into me.
“There are only single bathrooms?” I ask as we enter a small lavatory. All I’ve known since being in the forces are the large communal bathrooms, so seeing one this small on a base is a shell shock to the system. Subway tile lines the entire back wall. There’sno privacy curtains or stalls separating the rest of the room from the shower and toilet. It’s all out in the open. At least there’s a door that locks to come in, butJesus.
Cameron grabs two towels from the cabinet and sets them on the sink without a second thought. My cheeks burn, and I turn to leave as I say, “I’ll shower in the other one.”
Obviously, I’m no stranger to any part of him, but there’s agony that still exists between us. I’m not up to deal with it tonight.
His hand gently comes down on the door knob over mine and instead of opening it, he flips the lock. I suck in a breath and hold it as he turns me around, gliding his fingertips over my collarbones. I’ve yearned for his touch, even when I’d forgotten him, I still longed for his hands to caress me.
Only Cameron could make his emotions known with just the brush of his callused hands. The craving that lurks so deep within him stirs inside me too.
“I didn’t get the chance to tell you how lovely this dress looks on you,” he whispers as he unbuttons the front slowly. My lips part as he smooths his hands over my skin, sliding each shoulder piece down and causing chills to erupt over my arms.
He lowers his head and presses a hot kiss to the notch of my throat. The heat from his breath makes my thighs rub together. “I didn’t get a chance to tell you how beautiful you look with your short hair. And don’t get me started on how sexy this dress is on you.” I giggle as Cam brushes a few of the choppy locks behind my ear. I close my eyes and relish in his embrace and his words.
“They took my hair because they knew I loved it, but I couldn’t shed a single tear over something as fickle as hair when what I truly loved was you. They can take everything from me as long as it isn’t you,” I murmur as I stare into his eyes and cup his cheek with my palm. Cam leans into it and blinks slowly before letting those soft sage gems trace my features.
“You’re not allowed to love someone as monstrous as me, Em. Not after everything I’ve done,” he says sadly, his British accent is heavier when he whispers. I smile at the sound of it. He leans forward, hesitating a moment before giving in and letting our lips connect.
The world falls apart. The ocean of worries seizes its waves. The only thing that matters to me in all the universe is here. It’s him.
“I can’t help it. Even when I forgot who you were, I was falling in love with you all over again,” I say between his starved kisses. “I’m still mad at you and expect answers, but for tonight let’s forget everything except each other.”
Cameron breaks our kiss and presses his forehead to mine. “You never lost your ire. Not once.” He half chuckles and continues to undress me. “I love you, Em. I’ve loved you since before the last trial. Part of me hoped you’d never love me back, because I knew I would fuck up. And I did?—”
He cuts himself off as his hands slow, dropping them to his sides. Cam’s expression twists with grief.
