“Do you think everyone saw it?”
“No,” Shar said, right as Maddie said, “Maybe?”
I didn’t know if it was the hospital room or the sheer perfection of Shar and Carter sitting in that bad, but the emotional dam I’d built talking to Maddie burst in an instant. Tears filled my eyes. “I’m an idiot.”
Maddie scooted closer, pulling me against her.
I told them everything, and I mean everything. Starting with making out with Garrett over the summer, because that shameful secret had been living in my body unchecked for too long, and then the rest came tumbling out.
How alone I’d felt after they both got together with Rob and Chase, how I’d tried to make new friends, to hang out with Tash and her group, but it didn’t feel the same, and I missed them,but it wasn’t their fault because of course it wasn’t, and then the whole deal with Logan. How he called and wanted to help, and I was a complete self-righteous D-bag to him, and then I pulled the most selfish move without owning up to it.
How I’d wanted to keep it a secret because it was Logan and it wasn’t even real and I never in a million years wanted to hurt Shar, but I didn’t know what I was going to do after graduation and I felt like a complete and utter failure, and now I was selling my soul to get in with Norman Marcus who I was quickly finding out was also using me to link up with Douglas for grant money.
“The whole thing is a pile of steaming dog poo, and I’m the worst friend in the world!” I finished with true dramatic flair.
Shar and Maddie stared at me a moment, stunned. Then Shar let out a breath. “Wow.”
“I know!” I splayed out over the back of the couch like a dying fish.
“No, I meant, wow, like this is an amazing opportunity, Crys.”
I lifted my head, skeptical. “That’s what you got from all that?”
Shar didn’t miss a beat. “Yes! Let’s be strategic, here. If Norman—super weird that he has the same name as my dad, by the way—is using you, then why shouldn’t you use him back? And this is helping Logan, too, right? So why the hell not? Men do it all the time, so why can’t we use a relationship to our advantage?”
I blinked. That was a very good point. “But it doesn’t bother you? Me showing up like that with Logan? It wasn’t real AT ALL?—”
“I know!” Shar laughed. “And yeah, I won’t lie and say it doesn’t tweak something in me to think of you two spending time together. Not because I have a problem with it, justbecause . . . I don’t know.” She pondered for a moment. “I think I just don’t want you to get hurt.”
I snorted. “No worries there. We have rules.”
“What?” Maddie laughed.
“Yep. No touching unless absolutely necessary, only four events until the opening, and then we’ll have an amicable break up.” I mimed washing my hands of him. “He’ll get his PR credit and make his mom happy, I’ll hopefully have a job offer?—”
“Yeah, this is a win-win,” Shar said.
Maddie nodded in agreement, her brows still pinched. “I’m just . . . so sorry, Crystal. I had no idea?—”
“No, please. I promise, this is a me problem.”
She shook her head. “No, it’s not. I know it’s not our fault, I get that, but I didn’t think about how our relationships affected you. I want to be better.”
“But Chase needs to be your priority.” I pointed at Carter. “And your two guys need to be yours.”
Shar’s face screwed up. “Yes. But you’re family, too, Crys. I agree with Maddie. We need to make this work.”
Tears rolled down my cheeks, and I pulled Maddie up from the couch for a true group hug plus one brand new, tiny human.
As soon as we pulled back, Rob pushed through the door, a tired smile on his face. “Alright. What’d I miss?”
Chapter
Twelve
By the timethe donor breakfast officially started, I’d already refilled the coffee urn twice and alphabetized the name tags three different ways. The Rozsa Centre atrium at Douglas was dressed for brunch. Round tables with white cloths, little glass vases with maroon and gold mums, trays of pastries under domed lids. The floor-to-ceiling windows showed a winter wonderland with all the tree limbs kissed with frost.
On the far side of the room, Norman worked the donors like a man competing in speed chess. Three conversations at once, all easy smiles and pointed comments. Two university administrators, one from Advancement, one from Fine Arts, hovered like vultures. ACalgary Heraldphotographer lingered near the entrance, fiddling with his flash.
