Mrs. Kelly. The fucking PE teacher. She ratted me out.
Okay, here’s the deal. Not that I need to justify myself to anyone, but this is what I know to be true.
There’s oxytocin. That’s the love drug. And then there’s lust. That’s the pure sex hormone. And they are polar opposites. I’m talking smokin’ hot and frigid cold. Pleasure and pain in the ass. Soaking wet and very,verydry. Love and sex: never the two shall meet. You can fall in love, or you can have great sex. But love and chemistry can’t coexist.
That’s why the Bone It app was invented.
No dating. No love. Just hookups. For one night only.
Now imagine, if you will, the kind of men who use said app.
Yep. Those kind of men. Which, admittedly, makes meeting one of them after work an oversight on my part. But after two duds in a row, the horny inside was desperate.
Last week, app in hand, I found a dude who lived around the corner. I swiped right on my lunch break. He insisted hemeet me at the end of my workday and walk me back to his place. Add in the handful of my ass he grabbed as I barely crossed the school gates, and to be honest, I’m lucky only Mrs. Kelly saw.
The man in question? I don’t remember his name, but I remember he had a curve to it. And he reached places not even my vibrator could.
Iwascontent with my rule. Ithadn’tfailed me.
Until now.
Principal Holland’s corner smirk has grown into a full-blown one. I want to punch it off his face. Instead, I take a breath. He’s waiting for my response.
There are two ways this can go down from here. The first: he’ll try to control my private life and, in that case, blessed be the fucking fruit. Or: he’ll use this as grounds to fire me.
I note his smug expression.Holy shit.He’s going to fire me. No. No way. Impossible.
But apparently, it is quite possible.
“We’re letting you go, effective immediately,” he says, looking oh-so-very-pleased with himself, as if he gets off on ruining a person’s life. Which, let’s be honest, he probably does.
I pick my jaw up off my floor. I can’t believe this is happening. A part of my brain is questioning the legality of this—can he actually fire me for my social behavior? What will happen to my students who are taking advanced chem with me next year? Who’s going to make sure the supply cupboard is properly labeled? I glance at my watch. It’s 3:11PM. The bell is about to ring.
“What the f—?” I stop myself, knowing if I let out one littlefuck, I’m gone for sure. I clear my throat. “You can’t fire me over the people I date.” I use the term loosely because there is nothingdate-like about my one-night stands. He doesn’t need to know that, though.
He stands, making himself look bigger. A move I’m sure he read inHow to Lose Friends and Intimidate People. I think we all know from experience that the kind of man—scratch that, the kind of asshat—that needs to make himself look bigger is lacking in the pants department. I vomit in my mouth a little for thinking about his crotchal region.
He bares his nicotine-stained teeth, like a junkyard dog going in for the kill. “As youmayrecall,” he says, his voice oozing, “your contract has an ethics clause which states that no sexual interactions may occur on school premises. You violated that last week.”
And just like that, the first wave feminists roll over in their grave. I do some quick arithmetic. Can I sue the school for wrongful termination? Nope. This school has one of the top lawyers in the state on retainer, thanks to the sense of entitlement these rich kids have inherited. There’s no way I’d be able to afford to sue them and win.
“You already filled my position for next year?” I say, hating how soft and sad my voice sounds even to myself. These kids are my world. I may pretend to be tough and snarky, but I really do love that I help them love chemistry.
And now I can’t do that anymore. Not here, at least. And maybe not anywhere close.
All the open teaching gigs for the following school year have probably been taken at this point. This is a sadistic blow. He could have told me a week ago when all the new positions were being filled. And, coincidentally, when Mrs. Kelly saw my ass being manhandled.
“Do you understand what ‘effective immediately’ means?” he says.
The bell rings.
My stomach bottoms out as reality crashes down.
Holy shit. I just got fired for being the best chemistry teacher in the state who also happens to have a healthy sex life.
What the actual fuck?
CHAPTER TWO
