“Too much stress for this body of yours,” he says. “It’s a lot to think about. But if the Sinners are the good guys in all this, I have a hard time believing that if they knew your story, they’d judge you for it. They’d be lucky to have you as a friend, and if they can’t see that, that’s their loss.”
“I guess,” I say, unable to disguise my doubts.
“I’m sorry, it’s easy to give advice when you’re not the one going through it.” He squats down, and as I turn, his face is only inches from mine. “And I know it’s not the kind of thing where I can say anything that’ll magically fix it.”
“I appreciate your trying, though.”
He leans close, offering a kiss. A fresh wave of relief moves through me, mixing with the relief he already gave my back. Keeping our lips together, he straddles me, his arms hooking around me, like his mission is to get his tongue as far into my mouth as he can manage. It’s a welcome distraction, one I embrace until he finally pulls away.
“Since my words can’t magically fix it, I figured I’d see if a kiss might,” he teases, which makes me smile. “Did it work?”
I shake my head. “I think you might have to try again.”
“Maybe we just keep trying until it works,” he says before his mouth pushes firmly against mine again.
We hear some commotion upstairs, but we linger on each other until we hear thecreakof the cellar door. He slides off me just as we see Luke and Brad heading down the stairs.
“Seth and Cody should be here in a few,” Luke says, his gaze drifting before looking back to me. “Everything okay?”
“Not really,” I say, “but we should wait until the others are here.”
He and Brad exchange a look.
In a perfect world, Seth and Cody would walk right in and keep this from getting any more awkward, but minutes go by, and they’re still not here.
Luke and Brad settle at desks, pretty much ignoring us. I think about those days I told Matteo about, when Luke and I would hang out and have good times together. Back when he saw me as a friend. Even when I was helping the Saints out, a part of what we had felt real—at least, it did to me—and I hate that I can’t get those moments back.
“How are you doing?” I ask Luke.
He appears surprised by my question. Brad glances between us, as though unsure what to think about it either.
“I’m doing all right, Alexei.”
“Your uncle okay?” Luke’s uncle is all he has, since he lost both his parents when he was young. Luke was always telling me about what he’s up to and how he’s doing, so it feels like maybe hearing how he’s been will make things feel a little more normal.
“He’s making up for his Maui business trip. He’s there all weekend.”
“That sounds nice.”
I smile, but nearly as quickly, Luke turns to Brad, ignoring me again. Of course, I knew that just asking about his life and family wasn’t gonna magically fix everything, but…it stings.
Were we ever really friends when I believed what they were doing was wrong? When I was invading their privacy regularly and reporting back against them?
Before I can dwell on those unsettling thoughts, we hear commotion upstairs, and a few moments later Cody appears, followed by Seth.
“What have you guys done this time?” Seth asks. “Opened a portal to hell?”
Cody ignores his jab. “What’s wrong?”
Matteo hops up from the desk and shares what happened while we were at the cafeteria and how Finnegan reacted.
“You think it might be Farras?” Brad asks.
“No clue,” Matteo replies, “but maybe.”
“So we get him out here,” Seth says. “I ask some questions, and we do the same thing we did with Matteo, right?”
It’s a relief hearing him say something useful for a change.
