Prologue
LIAM
The soles of my shoes were heavy against the cement floor, the sound echoing throughout the hall, making me hyperaware of my surroundings. I pushed open the stairwell door at the end of the hallway and headed to the first floor, slipping outside to smoke a cigarette.
After that night, I felt like I needed one.
Being around Ty had been a struggle, especially at Eric’s condo, where I had to keep myself from looking at Ty too long. I wasn’t worried about my ability to restrain myself. I was an expert in the art of self-control. However, I was growing concerned about the feelings that stirred when I was around Ty Winslow. Meeting and spending time with him had been like sampling a cocktail crafted just to my taste—something made superb by some uncertain combination that never could be replicated, not perfectly—and then having it tossed into the sink.
The moment I’d laid eyes on him, this kid with blond locks who was dancing at the beachside bar, a broad smile across his face, his eyes alight with enthusiasm, it was as though his image had always been locked somewhere in my mind, some distant part of me waiting to zero in on the target.
And then I’d found him.
I’d seen him before—in pictures my friend Eric had shown me over the years. And when we met for the first time, I knew where the line was.
My friend’s son was off-limits.
Just a look.
Lust at first sight.
Spellbound, that’s what I was. And such fanciful delusions were dangerous in my business. I’d learned over the years that it was foolish notions of magical thinking that had led to the downfall of some of my greatest peers as well as my most sinister foes.
As a man who could easily fuck and quit it, being near him was the first time I’d felt fear—genuine fear in the pit of my gut. And it had driven me in-fucking-sane throughout what was supposed to be a vacation to set my mind at ease, alleviate some of the stress I’d undergone as I moved away from my work toward a hopefully pleasant-enough retirement.
I leaned against the wall of the building, pushing the cigarette between my lips and lighting it up.
I took a drag.
I didn’t smoke much, but when I was on vacation, I enjoyed a cigarette like I enjoyed a cup of coffee or a few cocktails. It was a pleasant thing to occupy my time, and these days, I wasn’t worried about becoming addicted to anything, as I’d dedicated decades of my life to learning to conquer my personal weaknesses. Although, as I saw a figure slip out from the stairwell doorway and recognized Ty as he searched around, the way my hand trembled assured me there was one thing I did fear: becoming addicted to him.
I wasn’t delusional enough to question why he was out there, especially as he turned to me, those steel-blue eyes looking right into mine.
It was like the moment just minutes earlier that had rattled me.
We’d exchanged plenty of looks before then, but that time, it was as though he’d peered into my goddamn soul. Something about his fear of being discovered—about me telling his father his secret: that I’d seen him making out with a guy at the bar—activated something within me.
“Sometimes, we have things we need to keep in confidence. Lord knows your father’s got his own secrets, and I’ve got mine.”
And the moment we made eye contact, it was as though Ty could see the truth behind the words, things he couldn’t have possibly seen, images from my sordid past, my work over the years. I’d been through enough in this goddamn world to know I could keep up my guard, defend against the most prying of gazes, but something about his was so intrusive, seemingly without even meaning to be.
As we stood together outside the condominium, I didn’t pull my gaze away.
Not this time.
I wasn’t going to show that foolish vulnerability again.
We just stood there, looking at one another, my cock stiffening as my mind wandered, fantasizing about all the things we could do together out there. It would have been easy to pull him around the corner and drop my pants so he could get those lips around my cock…or even better, use a little spit to ease my way into what I was sure was one of the tightest holes I would have ever been in.
I took a breath, collecting myself, centering my thoughts on his face, trying to distract myself from those fantasies he roused within me. I reminded myself of what I’d told others so many times throughout my life. That lust was a trick of the mind that could be easily overcome through sheer will and discipline, two things I had in spades.
As we both seemed to relax, I sized him up. “You have a thing for trouble, Ty?”
His lip curled upward to form an almost wicked smirk, as though he was some kind of demon that knew my weaknesses and was ready to prey upon them. “I guess you’d know that better than me. If I’m interested, does that mean I have a thing for trouble?”
I disposed of my cigarette in the ashtray on a nearby trash can before approaching him.
I could be strong, battle the feelings this kid stirred, which were starting to piss me off more than anything else, the way they made me feel out of control…a sensation I didn’t enjoy at all, especially as I neared him and those fantasies overtook my thoughts.
