I’m worried he’s going to press. That he’ll know, just like with the Morgans, that my nightmare must stem from something I’m doing, something I’m keeping from him and that he might be upset about. But he just holds metighter.
“I love you too,” he says. “And you’re not going to have an easy time getting rid ofme.”
“You’re right, but it can’t shake this deep fear that…I guess will always be in here, hauntingme.”
“Crazy how occurrences from such a very long time ago can have such a powerful effect on aperson.”
He pulls away, and I gaze into hiseyes.
“My pain is so trivial incomparison.”
“Pain sucks for all of us. We’re lucky we have someone who can help make it morebearable.”
He’sright.
It’s a silly thing I’m stressingabout.
Now that I’ve returned to my senses, in my heart, I know he’s not going to freak out over me keeping something I was asked to keep in confidence. Even if he did, like with the Morgans and my stupid grades, it’s certainly not the deal-breaker it is in mynightmare.
“Come here,” hesays.
He guides me onto the bed, and we lie down together, facing one another. As he caresses my face with his fingers, there’s something about it that’s a gentle assurance, just that he’s here, withme.
“Oh, Jesse, how many times do you imagine I’ll need to tell youI love youbefore the nightmares stop? A couple hundred? A couplethousand?”
Ilaugh.
“More than that, youthink?”
“I told you, it won’t do muchgood.”
“But would it kill me to try?” He winks, and now I can’t stopgrinning.
“There we go,” he says, tracing his thumb through my dimple. “There’s my happy Jesse.” He moves closer, until his face is right beforemine.
“I love you, I love you, I loveyou…”
“I love you too,” I say, laughing as I lean forward and kisshim.
And as I pull away, he tells me once more, “I love you, JesseMorgan.”
* * *
“Good game!”Sam says as he takes turns high-fiving the guys as we grab our bags from a picnic table we stacked them around while we played against one of the volleyball leagueteams.
Sam’s come a long way since I first brought him out here, and he really outdid himself today, not scoring, but making some seriously badass saves. It’s crazy when you consider it was just a few months earlier when he was fretting about joining me for flagfootball.
“Nice work, little man.” Ty rubs his hand through Sam’shair.
Sam giggles before saying, “Hey, hey, gonna mess up thedo.”
“You got a clump of sand in it,so…”
Sam’s expression turns serious. “Wait. DoI?”
Ty’s too busy enjoying a laugh at Sam’s expense to respond, so Sam turns to his other side, “Kelly, do I have dirt in myhair?”
“Naw, man. He’s just giving youhell.”
