Wes didn’t figure there was any point in beating around the bush, so he was just out with it. “We gave each other blowjobs,Art.”
“Joseph Duvall?” he iterated, obviously not the first person who had come to mind when he’d seen theinscription.
“I hope you’re not mad that I never mentioned it. I didn’t think it was my place to out him to anyone likethat.”
“I’m not mad that you didn’t mention it. It would take too long for us to chart out a list of everyone we ever messed around with, but I don’t think you doing that with him suggests he wasresponsible.”
“It’s more than that. When we would hang out in the woods, he used to carve his initials into tree trunks, logs…rocks sometimes. That shitty handwriting of his is unmistakable. I’m sorry. Maybe I should have said something to Joe when we were in his office. I don’t know what good it will do. What he did is heinous, but would it be right for me to expose him…especially when I don’t have any evidence other than saying his carving looked the same? He’d deny it and still get away withit.”
“I understand why you didn’t say anything,Wes.”
“It’s going to be hard for me not to knock him good when I see him again. That he would do that to us…in that spot…our spot. There’s a special place in hell for a guy likehim.”
“I’m sure he’d tell you that it’s a place in heaven. Although, it’s kind of nice to see that he’s got his own history he’s running from. Makes more sense knowing the truth. So he just did that with you and then…nothing happened after? Not that I would have an issue with that. I’m justcurious.”
“That was the first and last of it. Funny thing was, he was the one encouraging it. I don’t know that I thought about it well enough. I was an eager teenager, and so was he. And back then, I figured most guys must have really had a little interest the other way, so I didn’t think much of it. After that, things got awkward, and well, we know the path hechose.”
“I don’t understand what possessed him to go out of his way to offendus.”
“He’s a miserable person, Art. And he sees we aren’t, that we chose a different life, and I’m sure he resents that on some level. Even when word was going around about you in town, I have to admit I was jealous. I had some homophobic thoughts spinning around in my head. I regret that now. I’m not saying this to give my past self or even him a pass. I just can’t imagine what that kind of life has led him to, the pain he must feel, the way he must hate himself on the inside and how it’s eating away at him to the point where he would do something like that…to spit in our faces.” Wes practically barked out that final sentence because he was so filled with pure, unfetteredcontempt.
Art moved close to him and took his hands. “Thank you for telling me who it was. It would have been worse to sit here wondering who in Heathrow was trying to send us that kind ofmessage.”
“Please don’t mention it to the others. I know they want to help, but I worry they’ll try to get revenge or make things worse. I’m fine if they wind up discovering it was him and he gets fined or booted from the community, but I’d rather not complicate it with what I know from his past. If only because I have more respect for what was shared in confidence than I imagine he everwould.”
“Because you’re a better man than someone like that could ever be,” Art said, tilting his head up to gaze into Wes’seyes.
“I don’t know about that, but what I do know is that we’ve lived long enough with bastards like him trying to make us miserable, and here we still are. I’m just glad I have you through it all. You gotthat?”
“Yeah, I got that,” Art said, his smile returning, and that smile was all Wes needed to be reminded that despite the foul mood he’d been in since that morning, it was all going to bealright.
“Now come on, let’s eat some lunch.” They headed into the kitchen and made themselves sandwiches. Though they didn’t rebound quickly from their experience on their walk, Wes knew that with time, they would find their ease once again. He’d suffered enough hardship to be sure of thatmuch.
As they were seated at the kitchen island, enjoying their spread, there was a knock at thedoor.
“Maybe security,” Wesmuttered.
Art led their way to the door and openedit.
Tony stood outside, holding a white trash bag, a stoic expression on his face. “Hey, guys.” He opened the bag and held it out, revealing chips of bark and wood inside. “I asked Joe if they had everything they needed before I removed it. But it’s all gone. I made sure ofit.”
“That was really wonderful of you, Tony,” Artsaid.
“It was nothing. An apology I owed to an old friend, and both of you, really.” He opened his mouth and closed it just as quickly, but then went on. “You see, I spent a lot of my life standing by, watching and listening to people take cheap shots at gay people. Since high school. I never challenged anyone or stood up when I knew something that was said was wrong, maybe because I was afraid of what they’d say about me. It’s been that way for a long time, in college, then my career, and on the golf course. A lot of years staying silent. Let’s just say it never really hit me until a friend reached out, many years later, when the world had turned its back on her, and she was dying of a sickness she’d been blamedfor.”
It was the sort of story Wes had encountered so many times, too many times—an old record he knew byheart.
Tony’s eyes watered, the bag shaking in his hands. “She’d been around when I was in college, when she was my buddy Tyler. She was there when I said nothing. She saw me pretend to laugh at the jokes and smile as she was surely hurting, knowing I was an accomplice to their ignorance. I never felt she judged me for it later, but I felt bad all the same. So many times I wanted to say I was sorry for every time I did nothing, but before I could, she was gone. I didn’t do anything then, but I can do something now. I’m sorry.” The tears flowed freely down his face, and in all the time Wes had known him, he’d never seen Tony emote much at all, let alone with suchpassion.
“I’m sorry for all the times I didn’t speak up…for all the times I should have said something because it was wrong. I know this doesn’t make up for anything, but it’s what Igot.”
Wes didn’t feel it was an apology owed to them, but he could see the relief it brought Tony as he wept beforethem.
“Thank you,” Wes offered as he pulled him in for ahug.
Art joined them, adding, “Yes, thank you, Tony. Somuch.”
Wes hadn’t known Tony as long as Art, but the kindness in his act reminded Wes of what an incredible group of friends Art had discovered at the community. Despite that monster who ruined their morning, there were amazing people there too, who could make up for all theothers.
