What the fuckwas I thinking? I wasn’t, that’s theproblem.
Jesse is so fucking hot, and he made me so stiff that I couldn’t resist. And then that kiss… Oh God, the way his lips felt against mine was like he was sending a fucking electrical charge straight through my body, one that hit every nerve just right and left me filled with hunger…puredesire.
It was reckless of me to fuck around with Ty’s friend, and if it hadn’t been for Jesse being a fucking virgin, I know I would have followed through withit.
It would have been one thing if he’d just never had anal, but it was a whole other story to find out he’d never messed around with aguy.
Before I knew that, I thought we could have some fun, but I’m not interested in being his first time. His first shouldn’t be with someone who only wants him for his body, who wants to stick it in him to get off. It should mean more than that. He deserves better thanthat.
Although, I can’t help but regret not having fucked around with him. He was so delicious. He needed it so much. Like all he wanted was to feel my cock in hisass.
It’s been two days since we messed around. Since then, we’ve hardly acknowledged each other more than to be polite in front ofTy.
Jesse doesn’t say much to me. Doesn’t make eye contact. I can tell he’s upset with how I blew him off, and I’m fine withthat.
Regardless of how pissed he is at me, it doesn’t change how hard I get when I think about him…or when he’s around, whether he’s on his phone in the kitchen or chilling with Ty on the couch. I think about Ty slipping away, giving us another opportunity to fuck around. But then just as quickly, I remind myself that he’s off-limits. That I have to keep my shit together and keep from letting this powerful lust Jesse stirs within me from controlling me again…leading me to making a big fuckingmistake.
Not that he’d even want me after how I brushed himoff.
I’ve tried to throw myself into work. Nothing major. Checking stocks and prospective investments my assistant, Vanessa, sent over to me. And I need to review some shit for taxes before I meet with my accountant thisquarter.
I’m in the office of my condo, at my desk, looking out at the bay. A couple of boats are moving slowly across the sparkling water I wish I was out surfing on rightnow.
I hear a knock at my door, so I turn around. Ty’s standing beside it. “Hey,Eric.”
Sometimes I think he calls me by my first name to emphasize the fact that he doesn’t see me as his dad—that hecan’tsee me as his dad. It’s not something I blame him for. I understand why because I’ve never really been a father to him, even after all these years of trying to break through, trying to make up for losttime.
“You want to come hang with us tonight?” heasks.
I do. Not just because I want to be around Jesse some more, but because I want to have this opportunity to connect with myson.
“Come on, Eric. You’re here, I’m here. Let’s havefun.”
“Thanks. I’d be happy to go out with youguys.”
“Cool. We’re going to dinner, and then we’ll come back here and get ready to head out. Probably leave here around eight to eat. Mexican work for you?” His words are laced with sarcasm, and I don’t hide myamusement.
“Yeah. That’s perfect. I’ll see you guysthen.”
He leaves, and I keep working until seven thirty. Then I get ready and meet them in the livingroom.
Jesse is sitting on the couch, wearing a button-up, jeans, and a pair of boat shoes. With his short hair spiked in the front, he looks about as adorable as I’ve seen him since we got here. I’m not sure if it’s because he actually looks hotter right now or if I only think that because I know how good it feels to have his body pressed up against mine. Although, I wish I knew a lot more. I wish I knew what it feels like to have my cock buried in hisass.
“Where’s Ty?” Iask.
“Still getting changed,” he replies without even looking atme.
As much as I want to talk to him about what happened, it’s not appropriate. Not exclusively because Ty could walk in here at any moment, but because I should just let it be what it was and moveon.
Problem is: now it’s like an itch I can’t keep from scratchingat.
“Okay, okay,” Ty says as he walks out of the master bedroom. He runs his fingers through his bangs, his hair going every which way down his forehead as he pulls his hand away. “You guysready?”
“Yeah. Let’s dothis.”
I feel like that’s the stupidest thing I could have said. Makes me sound like his old man, who’s too old to be hanging out with them. Although, that’s thetruth.
We take a cab to dinner. Ty keeps the conversation moving. He’s good at talking a lot but not about anything at all really. Figure that’s one of the reasons we’re still struggling to get close after all these years. He can talk to me about his life until he’s blue in the face, but it still doesn’t make me feel like I really know who my sonis.
