“Ty, we have something to tell you,” Eric says. “I’m sorry it’s awkward like this, with both of us here, but we did talk about how we would tell you. We didn’t want you to feel ganged up on, but we also both wanted to behere.”
“You mean you tricked me into coming over here?” Ty asks, not looking at either of us. “You said you would tell me something, and now you’re both going to stand here, beating around thebush?”
“I’ve been seeing Eric. We’ve been seeing each other,” I finally forceout.
Ty makes eye contact with me, and it’s painful. I see his hurt, betrayal, and he’s not wrong for feeling it. “You’ve been fucking my dad?” Tears stir in hiseyes.
I can tell he asked the question so crudely because he’s lashing out. “Eric and I have been seeing each other since PuertoVallarta.”
Ty turns his attention to Eric. “I mean, I knew you had the hots for my friend the moment I introduced him to you, but I didn’t realize he even had these sorts of feelings for guys.” He looks to me. “Considering how long we’ve been friends, I would’ve thought if you would’ve shared that with anyone, it would’ve beenme.”
“Ty, I didn’t know what I was feeling. I’ve always had those feelings, but not likethis.”
“So you’regay?”
“I’mbi.”
“And of all the guys you could’ve experimented with, that you could have tried out these things with, it had to be myfather?”
“Ty,” Eric says, like he’s trying to step in to mydefense.
“Oh no, you’ll get your turn,” Ty says. “Why don’t you give me a second, because I think it’s only fair that I get to say something about this. Clearly, in all the time this has been going on, I haven’t been on either of yourminds.”
“That’s not true,” I say. “We didn’t want this to happen. We weren’t trying to make it happen. It just did. We both knew it wasn’t a goodidea.”
“But what? You couldn’t keep your hands off each other? I would say I’m upset because this evening I lost my father and my best friend, but the truth is, I never had my father. You were never there for me, Eric. I thought it would be so great to meet you and that we’d have some sort of magical connection. That we could just pick up on all those things I missed out on as a kid. But I was wrong. God knows, I didn’t know how wrong. That not only would my father not give a shit about me now, but he would take my best friend in the world from me, which you were, Jesse. You were what I thought was an amazing friend. But like with my father, I guess I was wrong about that too. I never really had a best friend, because a best friend wouldn’t have done this to me. Wouldn’t have done this tous. So fuck you, Jesse, and fuck you,Eric.”
“Ty, listen to me,” Eric says. “I do love you, and I care about you. I know this is a shit situation right now, and I am so sorry thishappened.”
“You’re not sorry, because if you were sorry, you would stop fucking my friend. You would’ve never started fucking him to beginwith.”
“Ty, please stop talking about it likethat.”
“Isn’t that what itis?”
“No. It is so much more than that, Ty. We wouldn’t be here talking about it if itwasn’t.”
Silence. Ty’s defensiveness, his anger, his aggression seem to have stilled because of Eric’s serious response. It’s like Ty is taking in the weight of everything between the two of us, things he’s missed out on, the things we’ve been doing behind his back, the things that are the reason for all the pain he’s in rightnow.
“I hope you two are happy together, then,” he says with a smirk as a tear escapes the corner of his eye. He turns and heads for the door, and Eric tries to get in his way, but Ty pushes right past him, walkingout.
“Ty, please,” Eric says, heading afterhim.
Ty whirls around in the doorway and raises his hand in the air. “No, please stop. I don’t want either of you to call me or talk to me ever again. As far as I’m concerned, you’re both dead to me.” He looks Eric right in the eyes, clearly not wanting himself misunderstood. I’m waiting for Eric to continue fighting or try to, but he’s silent, and Ty walks off, leaving the dooropen.
We stand perfectly still. In some ways, it’s not as bad as the worst version I had imagined, but the part that’s hardest isn’t what Ty did to me, because as much as that hurts, it’s even worse seeing what it’s done to Eric and how wounded heis.
44
Eric
As I stareat the empty doorway, tears flowfreely.
What have I done to myson?
I’ve lost himforever.
“Eric,” I hear Jesse say behind me as I close the door, not looking back athim.
