“He told you?” Kate asks.
“Yeah, and I'm bi, by the way.” I figure now’s the time for total honesty—a first for our family.
Her expression, which has been serious up to this point, twists into a smirk. “Really?” She sounds shocked.
“Yeah, really.”
“I guess today is just the big reveal of all secrets, isn't it?”
“Apparently.”
“Scott,” she says. “Anything you would like to share?”
“I think if there is anything else Mikey wants to tell you,” he says, “it's probably better that it'd be him.”
Her gaze shifts between us as she takes note of the clue he just dropped for her.
“You dirty boys. Haven't you all been busy?”
“I recommend you play catch-up with Jordan,” I say. “I'm not interested in describing the details of my sex life to my sister.”
“I don't need the details of the sex part, but everything else, I'm down with.”
We laugh together, and it’s such a huge relief. All those things I’ve carried on my own are finally out in the open, finally off my chest.
And I’m just so goddamned happy that Scott was here for me. For this. I couldn’t have found the strength without him.
I chat with Kate some more about the truth before we talk with Jordan, too. It’s time for me to be free. I deserve that.
As I talk to them, Scott stays close, and I can feel his support right here with me. I need it, too.
When we finish up, I drive Scott back to his and Jordan's apartment. He has his things in the trunk—all his belongings that he brought with him while we worked on the house. Jordan offered to drive him, but I insisted. It's not just that I want to see him some more for as long as I can before I have to go; it's also that I want to talk to him about what just happened.
I want to thank him, really.
“You know I couldn't have done all that work without you,” I tell him. “And I wouldn’t have had nearly as much fun.”
“You could have done most of it, I’m pretty sure. I just did what you told me.”
“You’ll never really know how much help you were. Thank you.”
“It was an honor to serve.” Scott waves his hand before him as he leans forward in a symbolic bow. “So now, do you mind if I ask you about what happened back there with your parents? I don't want to push.”
“You're not pushing. I just couldn't stand it that time, watching them pretend that everything was okay and then Dad grating my nerves like he always does, trying to make it like my distance from them, like never seeing them, was about something thatI'vedone. And really, that was the first time that’s ever happened where I felt like I had someone who was on my side. I’ve always been afraid that they might find a way to turn Kate and Jordan against me if I said anything and that I’d feel so fucking alone. But with you there… at least I knew you had my back… and that was nice.”
I’ve been giving him the cold shoulder the past few days, but I acknowledge all that he’s brought into my life, how amazing he is, and how he’s changed my life in ways I’ll never fully understand.
“So thank you for being there. Kate was right. We've had too many secrets for too long, and it was time we faced them. Maybe now that the house is fixed, we can start repairs on what we’ve neglected for far too long. Our family.”
“I'm really proud of you.”
Is it terrible how good it feels knowing that he's proud of me? I shouldn't care as much as I do, not when he doesn't even want to be with me. But at the same time, I've realized over the past few days—even as I've abstained from giving him what we've shared so many times, hurting both of us in the process—I can't force him to want to make this work. And regardless of how he feels about me, I care about him.
I keep hoping he'll change his mind and want to find a way to have me in his life, but this is so new. It's just been a few months, so there's no reason for him to feel any way that he doesn't.
As I pull alongside their apartment building, all I want to do is invite myself up. I want another moment with him—against him, touching him, being inside him.
He looks around uneasily. “So it's just this weekend and then you're gone?”
