“Aren’tyou going to say hey to Reese?” Toby asks Jarod. “Come on, be nice.”
“Oh,I know he’s shy,” I say. I squat down until I’m eye-level with him. “Nothingwrong with being a little shy, is there?” I wink, and he smirks.
Iguide them into the kitchen where we all chat. Tyler tells me about the lastgame he played with his softball league. I glance over and catch Jay picking upMichael and twirling him around in a circle, Michael screaming loudly again.
Whenhe finishes, Jay glances at me.
We’vetalked about kids.
Wekeep talking about them. I know they’re in our future, but we both want to waituntil we’re ready. And I think that time is coming sooner rather than later.
Jaywinks at me, and a warm sensation fills my chest.
Inever believed I could have fallen so deeply in love with someone. Not the wayI have with Jay for all these years.
It’san amazing dinner. We chat and catch up with everyone and eat until we’restuffed.
Thenwhen it ends, we head out, and I know now’s the perfect time for my surprise.
“Beforewe go,” I say. I reach into my pocket and retrieve an envelope. Hand it to him.
“What’sthis?”
Ising “Happy Birthday” to him, and he grins as my voice cracks straight throughthe song.
“It’snot really my birthday yet,” he says as I reach the end.
“Shutit. It’s was the only way I could create a surprise out of it.”
Heopens the envelope and pulls out two tickets to the Rita Rudner stand-up show.
“Ohmy God,” he says. “I can’t believe you got these. We’re seriously going to herfarewell tour?”
“Yup.We’re going to Vegas! I already booked our flights.”
“Youshouldn’t have done that.”
“Well,considering my pay raise and your new job as supervisor, neither of us ishurting, so I figured we could indulge this year.”
Hehugs me.
Hedeserves this and so much more after ten years together. Ten years offriendship. Ten years of love.
Ashe pulls away, he kisses me. “Thank you. That was really sweet.”
It’snot the first stand-up show we’ve seen together, and it won’t be the last.We’ve had a lot of laughs over the years.
Notto say it’s always been easy.
Infact, some of the years were hard. I was right about the darkness. It came andconsumed me the way it does every so often. There’s no magic pill. The triggersdon’t fade. It wasn’t five years ago when the depression got so bad that somedays it was hard to breathe, but Jay stood by me and helped me get to mydoctor’s appointments, helped me through experimenting with new medcombinations. He helped out at work when I needed time off, which is what ledto his new position. He more than stepped up to the challenge. So while I wasright about this terrible thing within me, this thing that will never leave me,I was wrong about Jay. I didn’t kill him. If anything, he’s only become strongerand someone I can’t imagine living without. Not because I need him for what’swrong with me, but I need him because he makes me a better human being.
Wehead back to our house and stand in the bathroom after our shower, nude,getting ready for bed. I strap into my hands-free crutch.
Jaysays, “I know we talk about kids, but…what do you think? We’re about ready?”
Ibeam. I’ve been waiting for him to say this with such confidence.
“I’mmore than ready,” I say.
