Though I’m still seething aboutthe invasion of privacy I’ve experienced, my rage has settled quite a bit, butI’m sure I’m one stray thought away from downward-spiraling again.
Fortunately, Roeder says therewon’t be any repercussions for the exposure. Although a part of me just wishesthey’d pull me off this assignment. Clearly it’s become too much for me.
Kira asks about the game thisseason. About some of the scandals that Debra has worked so hard to defusewhenever they’ve arisen throughout the year.
“Some pictures have recently comeforward of your boyfriend, Bryce O’Riley. Are they really of him?”
“They are,” Tad says. It’s acanned answer that I heard him reviewing with Steph via their telephoneconference earlier.
It was strange hearing them talkabout my pain as something that needed to be addressed for PR, and as much asit isn’t Tad’s fault that this happened, it didn’t feel great knowing that myexposure was little more than an inconvenience to his sponsor and this imagehe’s worked so hard to manufacture.
“The pictures were taken anddistributed illegally,” he explains, “and the FBI will be looking into this andpunishing whoever is responsible.”
“And what do you say to the peopleout there who think that, since you were already nude for the photoshoot, Bryceshouldn’t feel exploited? After all, he was hardly shy on the cover ofEntertainment Weekly.”
“I think anyone in the samesituation would feel just the way he does. Similarly, it’d be one thing for afemale model to choose to be in a bikini versus someone releasing images of hernaked body. In both cases, the person involved has a right to choose what theydo or don’t show to the world. And whoever took it upon themselves to violatehim like that deserves to face repercussions for their actions.”
While the words are all right,it’s like a lovely piece of music that’s slightly out of tune. There’ssomething disturbingly inauthentic about it. Something that leaves me wonderingif Tad really feels that way or if he’s just saying it because he knows that’swhat people expect him to say.
Kira’s interview shifts back tohis performance this season, and he responds with his usual effortlessness, thesort that makes me question if it’s just the talent he’s acquired at handlingthese sorts of interviews or if he’s really able to so effortlessly set asidewhat a crap past few days this has been for me.
Darren sits in a chair off to theside, on his phone, probably chatting with someone on Grindr to meet up withwhen this interview is over.
I gravitate toward him. He glancesup and offers a friendly smile. The sort of smile that makes me feel less alonein all this.
Surely Darren has a betterappreciation of what I’m going through. Unlike Tad, he hasn’t chosen to be inthe public eye. He enjoys his privacy. He gets to live at least a somewhatnormal life.
“Tad, can I ask you about yourmother?” Kira asks.
The question catches my interest.It hasn’t come up since the Henry Mason interview, and it seems like an oddthing for her to bring up out of nowhere.
“She’s doing fine in Kentucky,” hereplies. Judging by the look on his face, he seems fine. Unaffected, even. Onceagain, I can tell he’s trained himself to hide his true feelings, and it leavesme only guessing about how he must feel when we’re together. Or if he reallyfeels anything at all.
“Really?” she asks, furrowing herbrow, her sculpted eyebrows that match her wig perfectly shifting with it. “Oursources did some digging and we recently discovered that your mother committedsuicide in 2003.”
“What?”
That cool attitude that Tad’s usedthrough the interview diminishes in an instant. He’s horrorstruck. And of allthe things that could have made this day even worse, this one hits me like ablow to the gut.
“Did your father ever mention thisto you?”
I can tell by his reaction that hedoesn’t have a clue, and I’m wondering if Kiernan knows the truth or if there’smore to the story. After all, Tad’s never cared to talk about his mother, andneither has Kiernan. But now Tad has to face it whether he likes it or not.
I look at Darren, who’s still sopreoccupied with his phone that he doesn’t notice the jam Tad’s in.
Tad’s eyes water. His gaze shiftsabout like he’s searching for an answer. He stutters, and it’s such a simplething, but it slays me, because I’ve never seen him falter on camera. Not likethis.
“Did you know about your mother’sdeath?” Kira pries.
“No,” he says so softly that hesounds like a child.
If Debra were here, she’d get himout of this.
“I’m sorry,” I say, stepping pastthe camera. Tad looks up at me, his face whiter than I’ve ever seen it before.
“What’s wrong?” Kira asks, hereyes wide, as though she can’t understand why I’m interrupting her interview.But I imagine she knows very well what she just did and how it crossed theline. If she’d told Debra she planned on asking this question, I doubt Debrawould have agreed to the interview.
“This interview is over,” I say.
