“And lately when I’ve been in the pussy, it’s been different.”
Her eyes narrowed.
“In a good way,” I said quickly. “Like you’re always juicy as fuck, but lately you’ve been even juicier, if that’s possible. Now you’re talking about stenches that nobody smells but you. And you’re sick off of tainted food, but everybody else is good. We’re always fuckin’.”
“We do have a lot of sex . . . unprotected sex.”
“Listen, I try?—”
She cut me off with a punch to the bicep and a huff. “Not if I’m pregnant.”
“You’re the one who can never wait for me to get the condoms, lil mama.” I helped her up from the floor, since she hadn’t heaved in about two minutes. “If I didn’t know any better, I would think you like me making you into a twinkie.” I smirked as she blushed. “It’s cool if you like getting nutted up, Bae. Just don’t be surprised when you end up pregnant.” I moved her to the sink so she could rinse out her mouth.
Our eyes met in the mirror over the sink. She was pretty as hell even with tear stains on her face, her hair threatening to escape the ponytail she had it in, and her cheeks flushed pink. She opened the drawer, pulled out a pack of new toothbrushes, and a travel size toothpaste. I stood beside her as she went to work on her mouth.
Once her breath was fresh, she spoke. “First of all, I’m so glad that I decided to stock this apartment even though my mom and Bayliss haven’t hired a live-in manager.” She turned around so that we were facing each other. “Secondly, I don’t like there being any barrier between us when we have sex.”
“Like I said, you like it when I make you into a twinkie.”
“Shut up. I like that you make me feel safe enough to give you my whole self.” She took a deep breath. “You inspire me to trust you, and that makes me feel fearless where you’re concerned. That makes me feel, like I said, safe with you.”
I kissed her on the forehead. “Good. Because you can trust me. You are safe with me.” I bent my knees so that we were eye to eye. “I’m not gonna fumble you, Bailey. I know you’re coming off a marriage where that nigga was a complete butterfingers when it came to you. He fumbled, dropped, and mishandled you. That ain’t this.”
Her voice came out as a whisper. “I know. It scares me to trust you so quick. So soon after getting the divorce. My better mind tells me that I should’ve taken some time to myself to really be single. But my heart is so stuck on you, Bright.”
“Ditto.”
“But possibly pregnant?” She wiggled away from me and sat on the edge of the bathtub. “That’s a lot.”
I took her hand and pulled her up from the ledge of the tub. “Come on.” I led her into the bedroom. It was connected to the bathroom. I sat her on the bed, then I pulled up the chair from the desk in the corner over to the bed. I sat down facing her. “It’s scary.” It was a statement, not a question. I could tell she was scared, because her eyes were wide.
“I could never get pregnant when I was married. We were together for almost seven years, and I only got pregnant that one time. I thought I was infertile. I don’t even know if I can carry a baby to full-term.”
I could see what looked like the beginning of her spiraling, so I took both of her hands in mine. “Let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves until we find out for sure.” I studied her. “Do you feel like you felt before? Do you feel pregnant?”
“I didn’t. But now? I don’t know. Maybe.”
“Do you think you can make it through the rest of the soft opening? Do you think you’ll get sick again?”
She shook her head. “I won’t eat anything else. And if I smell something, I’ll try to play it off.”
“When this is over, we’ll run to Red Leaf to get a pregnancy test.”
“We gotta go to Red Leaf to get a pregnancy test?”
“You want your mother . . . or my mother to know before you even finish peeing on the stick?”
“No. Okay. Let’s try to get through the rest of this soft opening.”
Once the last guests left the bed and breakfast and all of the vendors had been paid, we said our goodbyes to Pearlie and Theo. Bailey and I finally made the run to the big box store in Red Leaf and pick up what we needed.
Back at my house, Bailey spread all three urine soaked pregnancy tests out on the countertop in the bathroom connected to my bedroom.
“Say, let’s make sure to wipe that countertop down with bleach spray once we get our answer,” I said, pulling her down into my lap.
She’d been pacing back and forth in front of the foot of the bed while I sat there. “Listen, if these tests say you’re pregnant, I’m telling you right now that I’mma be happy. I’mma be nervous, and I’m probably gonna be focused on processing what it means to prepare for fatherhood, but I will be happy. So even if I’m not jumping up and down, even if I seem distracted, I need you to know that I’m happy.”
She snuggled against me. “Thank you for knowing I needed to hear that, Bright. And thank you for saying it.”
