“What’s happening with the divorce?”
“The court approved my attorney’s motion for a default judgment. She’s gonna let me know once my case is on the books. I’ll have to go back to Chicago for sure for the hearing.”
“Are you gonna stay there? Go back to work and pick up your life?”
I sighed. “I wish I didn’t feel like I had to, but you know how Chicago Transit Works pays, Perk. I mean, Mom raised four girls by herself off her paychecks working there. I didn’t go to college . . . or hair school. Where am I ever gonna make the kind of money I make with just a high school diploma?”
“Yeah.”
“You know we grew up with Mama living paycheck to paycheck. I don’t live like that, Perk. My paycheck covers everything I need, plus some. I make enough to actually save.” I paused. “Well, I could save if Xander didn’t spend money as fast as we make it. I like knowing I don’t need Xander’s income to survive. Knowing that I can make everything happen that needs to happen with my own paycheck gives me freedom.”
She didn’t say anything for a minute, which was unlike Perkins. She was the bossy big sister that always had something to say. Always had an opinion to share. Always thought she had the right answers to figure out your life for you.
“What?” I probed.
“I don’t know. I don’t wanna come off sounding like a bible thumper or nothing. I mean, I’ve only been going to church regularly since I moved here. I’m definitely a baby Christian.”
I huffed out a sigh. “Just say it. I know you want to.”
“When you said that your paycheck was freedom, the thought dropped in my mind that what if what you view as freedom is actually bondage? What if your belief that your paycheck is freedom is what will actually keep you tied to a dead situation?”
What Perkins saidto me stayed on my mind all during dinner, through us bathing her girls, and getting them into their pajamas. I loved helping out with my nieces and helping out with the bed and breakfast. I felt like those things gave me purpose. Like they meant something. Unlike my job which basically consisted of me apologizing to irate and entitled customers about service issues that couldn’t be helped. But could I walk away from my good-paying job and my steady paycheck over not gettingthe feelsfrom the work?
It wasn’t late, barely past eight at night, but I was tired and ready for bed. As I walked over to the dresser to grab nightclothes, my phone rang.
Mrs. Eckhart flashed across the screen. It was Xander’s mother. “Hello?”
“Hello, Bailey. Have you spoken to your husband?”
“I haven’t. I’ve been calling him all day, but he hasn’t answered or called me back. He hasn’t even texted.”
“I don’t know what’s going on with the two of you, but you need to fix it. You really need to come home and get him.”
“I need to fix it?” I took a deep, supposedly calming breath. “You are aware that your son asked me for a divorce, right? I mean, you were the one family member of his who was there at our house when we were memorializing the baby we lost. He came in and told me that he had a new family. Remember? My father knocked him out. I know you remember that, Mrs. Eckhart.”
She sighed. “I do. And I know Xander was talkin’ outta his head the day of the memorial?—”
I cut her off. “I felt like he was very clear.”
“The baby y’all lost hit him hard. I know he didn’t show you his vulnerable side, Bailey. But I saw the pain my son was in. Finding out that his first child, and a son no less, had all of those issues and wouldn’t make it full-term? He couldn’t process it. And I’ll be the first to admit that he did act up?—”
I cut her off again, because I wasn’t about to let her rewrite history and gaslight me. “Mrs. Eckhart, respectfully, your son has a baby on the way in a little more than a month. He was cheating on me before he found out about our son’s issues. Let’s not pretend. Did you know he had that girl on the side? Did you know he was running around on me?”
“He’s not himself since you left him.” She conveniently curved the question.
“He left me . . . for his new family.”
“He told me that you filed divorce papers on him, when he never really even wanted a divorce.”
“Then he shouldn’t have said it. He shouldn’t have cheated and he should’ve been a husband to me.” I tried to calm down. “Does he want two families? One with me and one with her? I’m confused.”
“Bailey . . .”
“Please tell your son to stay away from my mother’s house. We’re planning on pressing charges.”
“No! Please don’t do that! You and Xander need to talk. He’s not doing good at all. He and that little girl got into an argument and she hit him over the head with a skillet.”
People are still hitting folks over the head with skillets?That sounded like something from my mother’s era. Nowadays, I thought people just pulled out their pew-pews and let their bullets do the talking.
