There isn’t a moment of hesitation before he says, “There’s room for two.”
Man, I’m so fucking proud of him. Sometimes, it takes my breath away. Leave it to him to bounce back from rock-bottom, swinging for the fences.
He seals our lips together within milliseconds of me joining him. It’s soft and slow, a perfect reacquaintance of our hearts. I hope it never ends. His warm skin against mine is frying my brain, and I’m addicted to chasing the soft sounds he makes.
“I really fucking missed that. Maybe more than anything else,” he whispers in between kisses.
Truer words have never been spoken. Eventually, exhaustion starts weighing us down and forcing us to at least try to get clean. When we’re nose to nose in bed, he’s as cuddly as a koala, tracing shapes on my abdomen while I wonder if there will ever come a day where holding him like this doesn’t dissolve the weight from my heart. I don’t think so. It may have started to soothe his troubles, but I never could fool myself into believing that was the only reason. It couldn’t have explained why letting him go each time felt like leaving something behind.
“So,” he starts shyly. “Not that I’m fishing for compliments, but you have to tell me if this looks okay or not.”
God, he’s cute. “Lemme see.” I take his hand and bring it closer, inspecting it in the dim moonlight filtered through the drapes. After a few seconds, he begins to squirm. “Perfect,” I murmur before kissing him again.
It doesn’t last long before he starts laughing. “That was mean,” he declares.
“I know.” His joy is infectious. My conversation with Brady plays on repeat in the back of my mind, though. “You know that you can do stuff like this, right?”
His nose scrunches up slightly. “What do you mean?”
Here goes nothing. “I only mean, I don’t want you to not express yourself however you see fit because you’re worried about my opinion or anyone else’s. So if you want to do things with your appearance that you haven’t been able to before, you can now. All that matters to me is you being safe and happy.”
My fingers are crossed that he doesn’t need me to elaborate further. It’s been a long ass day, and if I say many more words, it’s gonna sound like I’m giving him permission when I’m trying to tell him he has autonomy. But Brady is right, which is annoying. He wasn’t allowed to experiment and find what makes him feel confident, and I refuse to continue it.
Easton snuggles impossibly further into my chest. “I know.”
Sometimes, I swear I hear him almost saying the same three little words that I’m keeping at bay. Maybe I’m wishing it to be true too hard and imagining it, but they’re hovering close enough now that either one of us is likely to snatch them from the air. It isn’t long before his breathing evens out and sleep claims him. I wait a bit longer, just to be sure before trying them out. “I love you.” It’s only a quiet whisper in the night, no one can hear it except for me. I like how it sounds, though. Next time, maybe I’ll be brave enough to say it when he’s awake.
CHAPTER 16
EASTON
There’s only one way that my body lets me wake up slowly and naturally, and that is when I’m able to feel my safe space around me—a heavy arm thrown over my waist or the solid thud of his heartbeat in my ear. Today, it’s his nose tucked against my neck, soft puffs of air ticking the sensitive skin there. Warmth fills my chest until I’m blinking tears out of my eyes.
Poor baby is absolutely crashed out. It’s still early, given the lack of light seeping in around the curtains, so I slip quietly out of bed so he can sleep a little longer. After finding one of Chase’s discarded hoodies, and kissing his raven hair, I pad downstairs expecting Brady and Blake to still be in bed too.
I hope they found something to help track Aaron down last night. If I focus on it too much, it will take me to my knees. I knew he wouldn’t leave me alone for long. But it’s okay. It’s got to be. Things are different this time.Iam different this time. Before, I never would have gone to anyone about my suspicions. It wouldn’t have mattered how long he waited to strike; his mind control tactics lingered too deep in the recesses of my brain.
Now, not only have I been able to confide in the people I love, but also gone to the police. That’s no minor thing. It’s got to beenough to keep him from getting his hands on me again because I can’t go another round.
My gaze wanders into the fog, wondering if he’s out there watching right now, waiting for the perfect moment.
I shiver, burrowing deeper into the fabric where Chase’s cologne lingers.
The stairs creak, making me scramble to find the source of the sound. “Morning, Eas,” my brother mumbles casually. “Did you make coffee yet?”
“No. I haven’t been down here long.” Not that I’m sure about that, but I got distracted which I think is understandable.
He shrugs, and I watch him go through the motions, moving around Blakely’s kitchen like he belongs there. Kinda does, I guess, considering how long we’ve been here. My heart clenches, noting for the first time that we take our coffee the same when he brings it to me. All these little missing bits of information that don’t matter until they do are going to be the death of me. “Thanks,” I say when he presses the warm mug into my hand. After a careful sip, I have to know. “Did you guess how I like it?”
“No. Just figured it would still be the same.”
I raise an eyebrow at him in confusion. “When Dad would go to work early, sometimes we could convince Mom to let us split a cup before school. Neither one of us liked it for much more than flavored creamer and feeling like grown-ups, but we drank it anyway.”
As he says it, the memories start coming back. Sugar always helped me get through the low days, and he’d sweet talk the shit out of Mom to get me an extra boost and keep suspicions quiet by pretending it was for both of us. “I remember now. Dad never would have let us have any. Said we didn’t have the brain cells to sacrifice.”
Brady nods, taking a long sip. “Talk about ironic. Even back then, he didn’t have many to go around. I can’t even imagine now.”
The thought makes me snicker. I nudge him with my foot. “We should see if we can look his company up. I wanna know if it ever went under.”
