Her lips twist to the side. “It is but it’s harder for him. Especially around this time of the year. The anniversary ofAdrian’s…death is coming up. So just a heads-up, if Danny looks off or acts a little different, that’s why.”
“No, he didn’t tell me, but I’ll keep that in mind.”
Now that I think about it, I’ve noticed a shift in him. Sometimes I catch him zoning out or forcing his smiles. He thinks I don’t notice, but I do. I’ve asked what’s wrong, but he says he’s tired or thinking about the draft or homework.
I know it’s not personal, but I wish he’d let me in. Maybe it’s my fault, and I shouldn’t have let it go. I should’ve kept asking. Maybe I don’t look approachable enough? Or maybe it’s me and my constant whining about my dead mother who I hardly had a relationship with.
Florida’s pitcher throws the ball, a fastball Pen says it’s called. I still don’t know the names of all the pitches—I’m not sure I’ll ever know them—but I can kind of tell the difference between them.
He gets a strike on Daniel, but at the second pitch, Daniel makes contact with the ball. It’s a fly ball, landing center field, but it bounces off the center fielder’s glove and onto the grass. He quickly scoops it up, throws it to their shortstop, but Daniel makes it to second base and Noah has already come home.
Pen stands and smiles down at me, but it’s off. The same way Daniel’s has been. “I’ll be back. I’m going to the restroom and then heading to the concession stand. Do you want anything?”
“I’ll go with you.” Esmeralda stands.
I’d offer to go but something tells me they need a moment alone. “I’m okay.”
My eyes stay on Daniel, but my mind drifts to everything we’ve talked about. I want to be enough to be able to help him, but what if I’m not? Maybe that’s why he didn’t tell me; I’m so emotionally fucked, and he knows that.
I squeeze my eyes shut, hating how my thoughts start to spiral out of control.
“You know…” Julio takes the seat next to me. “I’ve seen Danny smile but never like that. Well, I have, but it’s been a while.”
“Really?” I find myself saying.
“Yeah…” He trails off. “I also never thought I’d see the day he’d willingly want to learn how to swim.”
“I kind of coerced him.”
He huffs a chuckle. “No, I can guarantee you didn’t. He willingly allowed that because he trusts you. So thank you for taking the time and being patient.”
I twist my ring. “You shouldn’t thank me. I’m just doing my job.”
“It’s more than that for Esme and me. You have no idea how much this means to me. I know Danny might not think that; I’ve made mistakes I can’t take back, but I mean what I said. I’ll forever be grateful to you.”
My throat constricts at his despondent, grief-stricken words. I stop twisting my ring and look at him. “It’s not my place to tell you this, but maybe you should talk to him.”
I don’t know what that’ll do between Daniel and his dad. It’s not like I really know what happened. Daniel’s been reluctant to share with me, but I understand complicated relationships.
Despite my strange relationship with my mother, I regret not talking to her when I had the chance. I don’t want the same to happen between Daniel and Julio.
49
JOSEFINE
“Bidi Bidi Bom Bom”is the song of the day.
My lips curl up so high, the same way they did earlier at the stadium as I turn the volume dial to max. Surprisingly for how old the stereo is, it doesn’t sound too bad.
I’m on day twenty-two since Daniel gifted me the CD and I’ve heard just about everything both in English and Spanish. There’s no telling what’ll play next, and I’m both intrigued and excited for the day to end just so I can hear a song.
I know I could listen to everything in one go, but it makes it more thrilling like this. And I’m certain Daniel also looks forward to this. He’ll ask me about the song of the day and what I thought about it.
The front door opening and closing has me turning around. I’m nervous and happy. My thoughts feel like marbles, scattering and bouncing all over the place in no particular direction.
My heart is going haywire, my brain isn’t functioning properly, and my skin is covered in goose bumps from my neck down to my legs.
When Daniel steps into the living room, my first instinct is to run to him, but I stay rooted in my place. My gaze bounces to his suntanned face, the backwards hat, the crooked grin that dropswhen his gaze darts to my outfit. Then to the stuff he’s holding in both hands.
