He cocks a brow. “Do you want to be my queen? Is that it?”
“Don’t flatter yourself!” I hiss, hitting his chest with my fists. “We both know that once you end Morcant’s life, that is it. We will part ways. I will go to Earth and live there happily. We are nothing to one another.”
He doesn’t let go, instead holding my elbows firmly as he tugs me even closer, his eyes burning into mine. “Really? Because if you ask me, you seem to be falling for me. Tell me I’m wrong, Little Liar.”
I clench my jaw, my nostrils flaring as I look into his handsome face. How can I admit that I’ve fallen for him? That I want him, even if he is a sky siren?
But instead, I counter his question with one of my own, “You’re asking me?! Have you asked yourself how you feel?! Whatever this is – was, it’s more than just sex,” I whisper hoarsely.
The subtle care, the protectiveness, his worry, concern for me, the way he made sure I was warm at night. The way he held me…
“You’re delusional. I have a goal, a mission and a command from my king-”
“Stop making excuses. I’m not asking what you’re meant to be, I’m asking what you feel.” I should stop, but somehow, Iknow if I stop now, I won’t get the answer.
“I am not making excuses. What makes you think I care? I am the most powerful commander-”
“Deny it then! Deny it and let go of me,” I challenge, my hands pressed against his chest. “And I will never bring it up again.”
He knows I mean it. I can see it in his eyes. “I have an order to carry out. She is the King’s sister. I don’t even know her personally.”
I shake my head, turning away as I remove my hands from his chest, and he lets go. My heart shatters, but seconds later, he’s wrapped his hands around my wrists as he tugs them against his chest. “Look at me.”
I refuse.
The wind blows, and it’s as if fragments of my soul are being pulled away. Why do I feel so intensely about this? How deeply do I truly feel for him?
“I don’t have the right to feel. My life is dedicated to the King’s command. I lost my humanity long ago. You will not be missing out on anything.”
I scoff. “So then why try to justify it?” I ask, looking up at him.
He’s quiet. “Maybe because there’s something in this fractured heart of mine that can still feel.”
My heart thumps. Is he… is he confessing?
“I…”
“Maybe this is my fate for the crimes I have committed at Varkhazan’s command. Knowing my future is decided, maybe loving you is my punishment,” he says huskily.
Time seems to stand still as I stare up at him. ‘Loving you…’
Did he just say he…
“Knowing that this can never be,” he finishes, now looking away.
I relax in his hold, tugging my hand free from his grip, and he allows me. I reach up, cupping his face, his stubble prickling my hand, and this time I make him look at me.
“We decide our own future. You’re strong enough. Varkhazan sent you here alone to deal with Morcant. He isn’t here himself. End Morcant’s reign, step away from Varkhazan’s shadow. Win the people of Varindor over, and become the King in your own right. I will help you.”
He’s looking at me, and for the first time, he’s almost… vulnerable, but he’s considering it.
“Is Varkhazan really a good king? Does he deserve to call himself the King when he doesn’t even know these people? We need a good king,” I whisper. “And I know you can be that king.”
He cups my face, pressing his forehead to mine. “Maybe…” He closes his eyes, inhaling deeply.
I have to tell him.
“Kai… there’s something I have to tell you,” I whisper softly.
