“If Winnie comes over to sit with Emma for a few minutes, could you meet me in Pelican Bay?”
I pucker my lips while I stare at Emma playing on the ground and messing up her rainbow-colored blocks. “I guess. Is it important?”
I don’t want to go to Pelican Bay to spend time with another man who didn’t find me good enough. It’s one thing to make mistakes but another thing to have them lobbed at you all day long.
“Very important. I’ll meet you in the elementary school parking lot in twenty-five minutes. Okay?”
“Okay, but I need more time.” It’s a twenty-minute drive to Pelican Bay and I don’t even know if Winnie is at home, much less if she can watch Emma. I can’t just drop my child off on someone else in the blink of an eye.
Nate’s voice crackles. “It’s taken care of. I’ll see you then,” he finishes and then the line goes dead.
With the call disconnected, I release a huge breath of air, letting it run between my lips noisily. “I guess here goes nothing, Emma.” She doesn’t even look up to acknowledge the craziness of our current situation.
I haven’t even gotten off the couch when there’s a knock at the door and it slips open. “Josie, it’s me.”
Winnie takes a step into my apartment waving her hands. I don’t know when we moved from a friendly knock to a best friend door open, but surprisingly that’s the least of my worries today.
“Did Nate call you?” I ask suspiciously.
Winnie smiles, her lips pressed together, but I can tell she has a secret. “He may have suggested you would need some help with Emma, and you know how much I love Emma.”
“I don’t want to bother you.” She’s playing so well I could take her with me to Pelican Bay.
Winnie doesn’t listen and walks right past me to sit on the floor with Emma. “I love her. And besides, Huxley may come over later and I want him to have as much baby time as possible.”
My eyes narrow. “Does he need a lot of baby time?” Is Winnie expecting something she hasn’t told the rest of us?
Her face blushes. “No, but I’m trying to work him into the idea.”
“Uh-huh,” I say and nod.
Winnie checks her watch as if she’s wearing one, but she’s only staring at her naked wrist. “You better get going. You only have about twenty minutes and you need to be in Pelican Bay.”
“I can’t go like this,” I say, looking down at my pair of ripped jeans and a tight NIN concert T-shirt. When Nate sees me for the first time, I need to look glamorous as a real reminder of what he’s missing out on now that he’s not in our lives anymore. The problem is I don’t own any ball gowns, but I could look better in a pair of slacks and a nice black blouse. Maybe show a little cleavage.
Winnie shakes her head. “There’s no time. You look great. Just go for it.”
“Do you know what this is about?” I ask because it’s obvious she does.
Winnie smiles and then tries very hard not to smile by pressing her lips together. She says no, but I don’t believe it for a second. “I have no idea. He only called and asked if I would be willing to babysit for a few hours.”
“A few hours?” What could we possibly do in the parking lot of an elementary school for that long?
I don’t bother asking again because I don’t think she’ll answer.
“Fine…” I say, drawing it out like a teenager being asked to do the dishes.
The drive to Pelican Bay has never felt so long… and so short. I try not to obsess over why Nate could be making me meet him at an elementary school, but I can’t come up with anything. Maybe he plans to walk into the school gymnasium and dump a bucket of pig’s blood on me. At this point in my life anything is possible. At leastCarriehad cool psychic powers.
My emotions while driving go from half expecting the worst and brief moments of joy to hoping he’ll pull an eighties movie reconciliation and show up with a boombox. But of the two of us, I should make the grand gestures. Even though they wouldn’t be enough to make up for what I’ve done.
Seeing Nate now will break my heart again. It hasn’t had a chance to heal from the last time. He’s already rejected me earlier this week. Why does he feel the need to crush me once more? Regardless of how I expect this meeting to go, I can’t trample the piece of my heart wishing this will be our chance to make up. A tiny piece of hope holds on that this time he’ll listen to my apology.
The parking lot is empty except for a single white four-door car at the far end. Everyone is gone over summer break, so it’s easy to spot Nate behind the wheel. I park my car next to his and turn it off, getting out when he leaves his car.
“Where’s the truck?” I ask after deciding it’s a harmless question, which won’t cause my heart to leap out of my chest in despair. Probably.
He doesn’t look right not driving his big oversized tires. Ones I swear are half the size my body.
