My eyes narrow as I stare at Drew hopeful he catches my look’s meaning.This guy is a crazy person. No way we are living with him.Drew shakes his head, and makes the sign for money, his two fingers rubbing together. I’d rather get a second job than have my showers timed.
“You have a great system with your current roommates. Why would you want to move?”
Like we don’t already know the answer to this. He’s obviously crazy and his other roommates have decided he either needs to move out or they’re going to hack his body into pieces and hide him the basement. A decision I’m sure Drew and I will face soon enough if he moves in here.
“It’s a horrible affair, really.” He clicks his tongue one more time and I envision ripping it out of his mouth. “One of the roommates let his girlfriend buy him a cat. Even though it was expressly stated in the contract no pets. Everyone voted to allow him to keep it, but I can’t live there knowing I’m breathing air from a litter box.”
Yeah right. I’m sure the ingenious person who brought home the cat knew it would scare off the real-life Sheldon Cooper. Even though I won’t allow Jesse to live with us — I’ll bring home Mittens if need be — Drew takes the time to show him the spare empty bedroom. He even answers his concerns about there not being enough electrical plugs in the room.
I stay quiet for the rest of the tour sending Mr. Psychopath away with another fake smile. Drew closes the door with a promise to call him soon and I throw a random penny from the kitchen table at him. It hits him in the neck and bounces off, rolling on the floor.
“What the fuck?” He bats at the penny but much too late.
“He is not moving in here,” I say like I didn’t attack him with cheap currency.
Drew bends down and picks up the penny, narrowing his eyes at me. “We don’t have a choice, Clare. We need a new roommate yesterday and trust me when I say he’s the top choice.”
“Can’t we get a nice normal person?” What serial killer people have applied for this place if he considers Jesse to be the best?
“Have you looked around the city? No one here is normal. We live on a piece of rock that is one earthquake away from falling into the ocean. And we pay outrageous rents on places that will crumble with us in them when the mother quake hits.”
I roll my eyes at his ridiculous worry. At times he hates the city, but he’d never consider anywhere else home. “Let’s give it a few more days and see if anyone else applies, please.”
Drew sighs. “Fine, but it’s going to be Jesse so brace yourself now.”
“Thanks, dear. I owe you one.” I turn intending to go upstairs.
“You will owe me more than one. Like five hundred when we need you to cover half of the missing rent next month.”
“I have a feeling you’ll find someone by then.” I really, really hope he finds someone by then. There isn’t much in my savings account, but if it means one more month without Jesse, I’ll cut the check.
“Where are you going?” His words stall my steps.
“Back to bed.” Drew knows I’m not one to sleep away a weekend, but if he’s smart, he’s not going to question it this time.
“I’ll bring you up bacon for lunch,” Drew yells up the stairs. It’s good to know my best friend understands my needs.
“Ice cream! Not bacon.”
