No longer covered by the awning, rain collects on his ever perfect hair as it beats against his head. His black suit jacket darkens with the wet stain. The words circle around in the air between us and Grant’s face pales.
Anger and sadness swirl around in my stomach. At war with what I have to do and what I want to do. “This is who I am Grant. If I don’t protect them, who will? Why didn’t you see that?”
How could he not have anticipated this outcome? The actions he makes in a board room have consequences for me and others in the city after he heads home for the day.
“I’ll fix this. Let me fix it.” With both hands held out he takes two more steps toward me.
My red, tear-filled eyes meet his — also wet with more than simply rain. I step back, but don’t have the strength to force another. I refuse to break down totally. I’ve already tried harder for Grant in the last two weeks than I have in a lifetime of relationships. If I want to continue breathing tomorrow, I can’t give him another tear today.
“This is never going to work. This is who I am.” I pull on my rain soaked sweatshirt.
“Clare…”
With a deep breath I deliver the final blow. “I would never be with someone like you.”
I use all the air in my lungs to rush the sentence out, which leaves me gasping for my next breath.
Holy shit. I’m breaking up with Grant.
And he’s letting me.
He steps forward again, “I love you.”
“Don’t be crazy.”
“This is me being very not crazy.”
In my moment of confusion, he latches on to my hands squeezing tightly, but I shake them away. “You just met me.”
“I’ve known since the first night I saw you. I’ve been waiting for you to catch up.”
“Stop!” My heart races and I brace myself with my palms on my knees. I close my eyes as the rain beats on my back.
“No. Not until you open your eyes and see.”
I sniffle, the first sign I’m losing my grip. “I see you,” I say standing again. “That’s the problem. I see a man who laid off over one hundred hard-working people to raise his stock a few pennies.”
Grant’s soaked jacket weighs down on his shoulder. His hair falls across his forehead almost in his eyes. The rain continues dripping down his face, but he doesn’t wipe it away.
“Did you think of me?” It’s too late, but I want him to grab me and kiss me and promise me when I wake up tomorrow we can be together.
“You’re always on my mind. You always come first.”
“Don’t lie. You didn’t think of me at all.”
“The choices I’m making now will build a future for us.”
My forehead pinches together creating those wrinkles I hate. “You think I want a future built on the back of someone else? Someone’s pain and misery? You don’t know me.” My hand covers the left side of my chest where a heart used to be. “Not here. Where it counts.”
Grant’s mouth falls open, but he’s silent.
“It’s over.”
He wobbles toward me, his legs shaky. “No. Please no,” he begs.
Lost in my own sorrow, Grant catches up and wraps his arms around my middle, but they’re cold from the rain and not filled with the lifesaving heat I seek. “Let me fix this.”
I push him away, angry he isn’t the man I need or want and sad I’ll never become the girl he’s looking for. “There is no fix. It’s too late.”
