CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
His phone rings twice before Finn’s sweet voice comes over the line. “Hey, Sweetheart. Everything okay with the taxi?” From his laid back demeanor, there is no way he knows I’ve found out his big secret. He’s probably sitting there laughing at how dumb I am. I wonder if he enjoyed pulling the wool over my eyes every day. Did they have bets going of when I'd figure it out?
My hurt seethes a moment before it turns darker. How could he continue to play me like this without any guilt or remorse? “It’s fine.” Everything is so not fine. "Where are you?” I ask in an overly pleasant tone, but he doesn’t pick up on my insincerity.
“I’m at Cosmo’s waiting on Trey. What’s up?"
“Well, Finn. I’m sitting here in my living room wondering why you still go to Cosmo’s when you could use your 2.6 billion dollars to hang out anywhere."
The phone is silent on Finn’s end. I’d worry he’d hung up, but voices of people speaking near him are still audible as background noise.
“How did you find out?” He breaks our silence with those five whispered words that slice through my heart. He doesn’t deny my allegation.
He’s worried about how I found out? I think there was a small part of me that hoped the paper had gotten it all wrong, but if that question wasn’t a confession, I don’t know what is.
“In the paper, Finn. Everyone I know is texting me the link this morning. My own brother knew before I did. How long did you think you could keep it from me?” Despite my best effort to muster my fury, my words sound as broken as my heart feels.
“Listen, it’s not what it sounds like. I’ll explain everything. I’m coming home. I’ll be there in less than thirty minutes. Wait for me. I’ll tell you everything.”
“It’s too late for you to tell me anything. I know what I need to know. I read it all in the paper!” Oh, there’s the anger I wanted.
“I swear I was going to tell you, Aspen. I tried to tell you this morning, but I couldn’t. I don’t know what the paper said. I'm never in the paper. I purposely keep a low profile. It must have been because you were there as my date. I wouldn’t have garnered any interest otherwise.” Finn stumbles over his words.
His attempt at false flattery pisses me off more. I can’t find my earlier hurt any longer. My anger has consumed it. How stupid does Finn think I am? How long did he plan to keep lying to me?
“You must think I’m such a fucking fool. Here you are totting me along all over the city and I never questioned you. I trusted you, Finn. I believed in you, but all you did was lie to me.” I’m fuming and my tone reflects it.
“Aspen, I swear I was going to tell you. I never lied to you. I kept waiting for you to figure it out. I pl—”
“Never lied to me?” I cut him off. “You never lied to me? You lied to me every day!” I yell. “I thought we connected. I don’t even know the real you.”
His reply picks up immediately after mine. His words are frantic, “I didn’t know what to do. You liked me for me. Not because I can give you a job, or connections, or a lifestyle, but for me. I wanted those honest reactions from you."
“You wanted me to be honest? Right?” I don’t give him time to answer. “You broke up with me because you though I’d lied about what type of person I was, but spend some time with a mirror, Finn. You’re the biggest liar of us all.”
I can’t sit on the couch any longer, my emotions need an extra release so I stand and pace the short length of my living room. “You had nothing but honesty from me and you repaid that with lies. How could you?”
“I never lied about who I was. That’s the point. We’ve had an honest relationship. You know the real me. Not the one people think I am or expect me to be, but just me." A bell jingles in the background. “I let it go too far. I didn’t know how to tell you, but don’t hate me for that. Please. I did what I had to do because I didn’t want to lose you.”
My fingers wipe at my face and come back wet. I didn’t feel the tears before. “How could you lie to me every single day?” I used up all my rage in my earlier outburst. Now my words are flat and dull. I’m spent. Resigned.
“I’m so sorry. Please let me get there. I’m getting a ride right now. We’re going to be all right. Okay?”
“No, it is not okay. The time for talking has passed. You had your chance.”
“I fucked up, okay? I totally fucked this up, but I don’t want to lose you, Aspen. Wait for me.” A car door slams on his side of the conversation.
“You’ve already lost me, Finn,” I whisper the words I’m too scared to admit, but he hears them.
“What can I do? Tell me how to make this better? Give me twenty minutes,” Finn pleads, his voice catching more than once.
“No. I can’t sit around and wait for you to tell me more lies. How can I believe you ever again?”
Finn gives whoever is driving directions to turn left and I will myself to action. I cannot be here when he gets back. I need some time to think. I need my friends.
“Aspen, I haven’t lied to you about anything. The money, yes… okay I lied about the money. The money isn’t me. I’m just a guy who happens to have money, but I’m the same person I was before.
