Turning to the crew carefully circling the stretch of cleared jungle that had been designated as the building site, he began to bark out orders. In moments, his son, Saisir, and Thar’oc were setting up a sniper’s nest on top of the control unit. Mitnick was already inside, and drones were humming in the air, flying off to scout the jungle for us. Jaxin was ordering men into groups for patrols, and others into groups to start bringing out the fence-building materials from the second wagon Raukesh had hauled. Raukesh himself was leading the handful of winged grunts into the air to do an aerial patrol. Everyone was doing their job, perfectly oiled cogs in a vast machine.
For a moment, I stood there and wondered what my job was in all of this. Did they even need me? It was very tempting tocommandeer one of the shuttles and race back to Frederique’s side. She was safe, I told myself again. Nothing could get to her on theVarakartoom. This wasn’t like when I’d left her behind on that waterworld on the edge of the Zeta Quadrant. Not like that at all. Yet, I could not shake the feeling that something bad was going to happen if I did not get back to her soon.
“You look like you’d rather be anywhere than here,” Jaxin said with a grin, his sharkish mouth baring sharp teeth. The humans were very much correct in that regard—Rummicaron had far too many similarities with the Earth predator. Though I’d never seen Jaxin express much interest in swimming, I knew most Rummicaron cities were built with both roads and waterways to accommodate travel. Just like sharks, the Rummicaron were perfect swimmers.
I gave the Weaponmaster a surly look that bordered on a glare. Of course, he just grinned and bared more of his sharp teeth at me, his arms cradling his laser cannon, as always. “What do you think?” I told him. I had a mate now; of course, I’d much rather be back on the ship and in her arms. Though the truth was, ever since Val had begun to struggle feeding from her, I’d been forced to spend less and less time with her. It was untenable, desperate, and it made me feel utterly hopeless about the future.
“I think you’ve been avoiding her,” Jaxin said, and I hissed in fury at that sharply observant remark. “You can’t change who you are,” he added coolly, not appearing impressed by my anger or by the way Val had returned to stand between us and growl. Jaxin swept his hand toward where Asmoded was overseeing the proceedings in the clearing, but it was obvious that part of his attention kept drifting to where his son was atop the control wagon. He was still not past the need to assure himself his sonwas safe, alive, and right there with him—a prime example of a male who couldn’t change. But then again, was that true? I thought Asmoded had changed—softened—ever since he’d met Mandy.
I was still contemplating that when I settled onwhatmy task was in all of this. Change… could it still happen? Was there a way to fix the bond between Val and me, help her consume not just darkness but light too? I’d never been more motivated to make a change like that happen.
First, though, I had to make sure that everyone was safe and that we could complete this mission as soon as possible. I had a mate to return to, and I was not the only one. That was my task—my part to play—to make sureeveryonemade it back home at the end of this mission. My eyes flicked once to Dravion, who was setting up his temporary med bay inside one of the shuttles. He looked back at me, our eyes meeting, and his seemed to say: I know what you are thinking, and you are not alone. No, that was true, Dravion felt that same responsibility.
Chapter 20
Frederique
Three days were a strangely long time to suddenly be completely without my dark, surly mercenary. I had not realized how much I would miss him, considering he’d already withdrawn. He called every day, especially when he knew I was about to go to bed. It was actually uncanny how he always knew exactly how to time his calls.
The time apart was making it clear how much that didn’t work for me, which meant I had to face one very obvious truth: mate bonds were more than just a biological imperative, like I’d always assumed. They were something more, something deep and special, something that could not be quantified by tests and measurements. Love, it was real, and this mate bond meant it was unavoidable. The fact that Sin called each night and left a message for me to discover in the morning proved it was not one-sided. He still didn’t say nice things, just: don’t forget to eat breakfast. Don’t stay up too late reading. Or a favorite: don’t steal my shirts, you wrinkle them. He was bossy, surly, but he could not stop reaching out—like I was onhismind as much as he was on mine, and I liked that.
“Do you think that mission is gonna take much longer?” I asked Val. She was by the door, lying in a curled-up little ball, looking pitifully small. It seemed improbable, but it felt like she’d gotten smaller over the past three days, and she seemed slow and listless. Not the protector that Sin had intended to leave behind. More worrisome, what if the same was happening to the parts of Val down on the planet with Sin?
I’d spent my time well, but I wanted it to be over. Sin and I needed to talk about what was going on with him and his symbiont, and why everything I read on the Sons of Ragnar made no sense. Val was supposed to feed on emotions in a delicate, careful manner, siphoning them from everyone around her and slowly growing stronger and bigger as she aged. By Sin’s own admission, he’d been alive since before the time I was born, Val should be much more substantial than she was. Big enough, even, to shape herself into a small ship at this point, a shuttle. Instead, she was maintaining Sin’s armor and a small avatar for both of us, and that was it. Not to mention her coloring: silver, when she should be black.
The symbiont sighed, laying down her small Riho snout and listlessly whipping her tail back and forth over the deck. She’d been doing that all morning, and I had this creeping sense that she was low on energy, that she was hungry, starving. But why? How? When I worried a lot about it, the feelings would drain away, and Val would perk up just a little. It told me shewasfeeding, but why wasn’t it enough?
“I guess I’ll go find the girls again. I need a new canteen with tea…” I said out loud. Sliding from the bed, I put down my tablet and wriggled my toes inside the fluffy socks I wore. The ladies on the ship had donated things from their wardrobes for me to wear, for now, but these fluffy socks had come from Ysa, the Ulinial engineer. She wore black overalls, clunky boots with extra thick soles, and her blue hair in a thick braid around her waist. She was a bit like an alien version of a tough goth chick, so the socks had skulls and bones on them. Of course, they werealien-looking skulls, because this was not Earth.
I wore leggings that Lyra had lent me because she was closest in size, and a sweater from Ruby, since she had plenty of clothes left over from her pregnancy. And Sin was right, beneath that sweater, I wore one of his silk shirts because it was freaking comfortable and smelled like him. He could deal with the wrinkles when he got back. This was not an outfit I would have worn before; I’d always been expected to maintain a strictly professional appearance—either my uniform or the clothing my parents had personally approved. It was comfy and relaxing.
“No comment?” I prodded Val, but the symbiont rolled over onto her back in a lazy manner, then flicked her thick tail over her snout and hid. She didn’t want to cuddle anymore. She kept her distance. She was tired… Yeah, something was seriously wrong. Most of all, Val hated leaving Sin’s quarters to see the others on the ship. When I did, she stayed as far away as she could without losing her ability to protect me. I felt so bad for her that I limited my visits to short ones—but it was making Harper ask questions, and Mandy kept dropping by to see if I was okay.
Stepping past her, I went to the door, but was suddenly halted when Val threw herself in my path. She’d moved lightning fast, faster than she had all day. Her small, furry body was fluffed out: all spikes and an angrily whipping tail. I stumbled, desperately trying to avoid getting impaled on all that sharpness. My hand caught the edge of a shelf, slid on the smooth surface, and knocked something fragile over, which fell and shattered into a dozen pieces.
What the hell? I was more concerned with Val than the shards around my sock-clad feet. What happened? Why did she do that, and more importantly, was she hurt? Her growling was weak and pitiful, more like a kitten than an angry Riho. It didn’t evencome close to what a snarling Gracka could sound like, but that was the form she’d taken now: her most favorite shape, sleek hound lines, pointed snout and ears, only she was so tiny.
Then I saw what she was facing, and the whole world seemed to narrow to that one point in the room. Color drained from my vision as panic began pounding furiously through my veins. Sleek shadows, curling tentacles that hinted at pink and blue. A flash of a face, ofsomethingthat was almost human but not quite. Davidson’s eyes peered at me with fervent, zealous obsession.
Val was so tiny standing between me and thatthing, but she stood boldly, bravely, swelling in size and fury as my fear flooded the room. A little Gracka with a mouth full of teeth and silver fury to back her up. It wasn’t enough, not even close, though my companion slashed with silver claws and danced between me and the danger, never letting it pass. I shuffled to the side slowly, my back to the shelves, my hands sliding along the edge for balance. This was a minefield of shards and danger, but I gritted my teeth when my foot encountered sharpness and got sliced. The door wasn’t far; I needed to get to the door. I was certain that if I could bolt through it, Val would follow, then I just needed to find the nearest mercenary to blow this thing to bits.
That was easier said than done, even if the adrenaline flooding my system made me forget about the pain in my foot. Val was shifting with me, and I knew the smart girl was trying to help me get out. Tentacles of shadow moved so fast, so quickly that I could see them blur through the air. Val wasn’t fast enough; she barely blocked each blow, and she wasn’t in good form. I had to get us out of here, as much for me as for her. Davidson did notlook like he was that interested in courting now. If he got his flailing tentacles on me, I was certain I was a goner.
Almost to the door, my back struck the wall rather than the knickknack-laden shelf, and my hand slid across the smooth surface to find the button to open it. The silver comm device on my wrist glinted, reminding me I had more options. I thumbed the device on as the door swished open, but then faltered. Calling Sin would just be cruel, he was down on the planet and couldn’t help me. I called Mandy instead; she’d know who was still on the ship and could help. At the same time, I stepped through the open doorway and into the lit hallway beyond.
Val was in a standoff with the writhing shadows; they were not trading blows, but she was still blocking his path. I couldn’t see his human face inside the darkness, but I felt his eyes on me anyway. It made my skin crawl and my stomach twist in my belly, threatening to throw up that thermos of tea I’d consumed over the past couple hours.
“Hi, Freddie, what’s up? Do you want some company?” Mandy asked cheerfully. The lights in the hallway flickered, dimming once before surging brightly. It was a bit like Mandy’s voice, the abrupt cheer after the terrifying seconds from before. My foot stung, reminding me that the danger was real—and painfully deadly.
“I need help, right now. That thing from the water planet, it’s in my room,” I said, my voice a hoarse whisper. Mandy did not ask stupid questions or panic. No, she was instantly all business, and I drew in a relieved breath. Mandy knew what to do; Mandy would make it all right. Except, help was still across the ship, and the Davidson creature was moving again, sliding across theroom closer and closer to Val, as if it were testing how much she would stand her ground. Val was backing up, slow step by slow step, but she was backing away.
“Send all the firepower you’ve got. Track my comm,” I whispered to Mandy. Then I did the only thing I could: I spun on my heel and booked it down the hallway as fast as I could. My feet pounded against the metal floors, socks sliding on the smooth patches and gaining traction on the grids. I was leaving a trail of blood droplets from the cut on my foot, and Val was racing after me, the tentacled creature hot on her heels.
It was sheer luck that turning two corners led me directly into the path of Ysa. She was still hunting through the ship in search of the source of those power fluctuations and just happened to be there when I took a left turn at random. I nearly ran her over, but she had fast reflexes and caught me with a deceptively strong, pale blue arm. Her next move was with the big wrench dangling from her other hand. It slammed out and caught the Davidson thing square in the face—or at least, the general area of the face.
A loud hiss and squeal echoed through the room, followed by Val’s snarl as she leaped at the creature and slashed with long silver claws through its writhing tentacles. “Fuuuuuuck,” Ysa cursed, in disconcerting English. “That was my favorite wrench!” She yanked on my arm next, urging me back into a run, away from the two clashing beings: black against silver, screech against howl.
I heard something crunch and twist, followed by a shriek so loud that Ysa and I both ducked and covered our ears. Too curious to resist, I looked, and then I wished I hadn’t. Val had beentossed against the wall, and an undulating, shadowy tentacle was deeply embedded in her belly. Val did not bleed, but I was certain she ached. When the tentacle withdrew, she slid into a puddle and curled away into the nearest vent. Out of reach, but also no longer in the way of Davidson and me.
