I was chowing down, not really paying attention, when I noticed that my goddess had a plate full of French fries, fried pickles, and fried zucchini. She noticed me eyeing her plate, and she smirked at me as she slid it over a little, inviting me to take some like we were food-sharing buddies. I gave her a lopsided grin as I grabbed a couple pieces of each kind. In return, I put half of my grilled cheese on her plate. She nodded at the exchange, finding it acceptable, and my heart did that flutter thing again. It made me feel like I was being a good mate, which made my insides tingle and the smile on my face grow so wide it hurt. I even puffed out my chest and gave my brothers a look that said I was the best mate right now and I knew it.
I watched as she lifted the sandwich to her lips, as that delectable mouth opened and took a sensual bite. I’m sure she didn’t mean for it to be sexual but that’s how my brain translated it. Strings of cheese fell down her chin as she pulled it away from her mouth, and I had to adjust myself because I was getting so hard that it was getting to be impossible to think of anything else. I think this was what people meant when they talked about ‘food porn’, and I totally got the appeal.
I heard Fame clear his throat, which was his universal sign to quit it, but when I looked at my brothers, they were all watching my little goddess just like I was, drooling over her taking a bite of that cheesy goodness, wishing we were a sandwich.
My life had changed so much in the past couple of weeks, but I wouldn't change a damn thing. Even the things I should change or feel bad about, I wouldn't, because all of those choices led me here, with a mate of my own, who I found to be the most stunning woman in the world, but who also got me, got my power, and wasn't afraid to challenge me. Challenge my brothers. Something I think we had been desperately needing but hadn’t been able to find.
Fame cleared his throat again, but this time I think it was more for himself than anyone else. “Should we talk about those weird vacuum magic spots?” He winced at his own words, but I also wouldn't know what to call those spots of land that had magic missing from them.
My little goddess put her food down, using her napkin to wipe her fingers of all the crumbs and grease from her food, before she folded her hands and rested her chin on them like she was in thought.
“So I don’t think it was vacuumed, per se. The nothingness that was sunk into the ground was strangely familiar, like something I had felt only once in my life.” She paused as she lifted her eyes from the table and looked at each of us. “I think it has something to do with Purgatory.”
Fame’s eyes started to go back and forth, trying to remember all that he had read about the place, because I was sure he had read something about pretty much everything to do with supernatural beings.
I looked at her puzzled, wondering what a place like that would have anything to do with Hell.
“Do you guys know anything about Purgatory?” As soon as she asked, Fame perked up.
“Yes. I know that it's a holding place for souls that have been seen by the soul sorters, but the scales were too close between the good deeds and evil deeds to put them in their designated spot. So the soul gets put in Purgatory while the soul sorters perform an in-depth investigation into their lives and figure out the best placement for the soul.”
Lillian nodded, smiling at how much he knew. His eyes twinkled with a kind of male preening one would do when they caught the pleased eye of their lady.What a sucker.
“You are correct, but what they don't tell you about is how the place was made. Raguel and Minos started to get backlogged pretty quickly when humans first started to die, so they petitioned God to create a space for those souls. God said that he would do it, but he put one caveat into the mix. The place they were to be held was to have no magic of its own. It was not to be a realm, was not a different dimension, just a wasteland where souls could wander in their own thoughts. He initially wanted the souls to do their own reflection about why they were put in that position in the first place. He soon found out that this caused the souls to be in a constant state of distress, so he changed the space even more. He made it so that souls that were placed there couldn't have emotions. They were in a state of perpetual thought, but also in a place of nothingness.”
She put her hands in her lap as she looked off, eyes unfocussed. “One day, when my dad was off doing King of Hell duties, Pop Pop showed up and told me He wanted to show me things, things that I would need to know about later in life. He took me to see Purgatory and explained how it worked and why, then He took me to Heaven and did the same. If you ask me, Purgatory was the real Hell and Heaven was kinda boring. Souls doing things for the betterment of the souls in the human realm, forever trapped doing something for someone else.”
She scrunched up her nose at the memory before she looked up and noticed that my brothers and I had straightened up in our seats.
She gazed around the table before she asked, “What? What's the matter?”
Con answered. “Lils, when you went to Heaven, did you ever see a large golden cage?”
My leg started to bounce up and down as my nerves started to skyrocket. We really hadn't told her anything about our past, but at the same time, there wasn’t much to tell. At least, we thought there wasn't. While in the cage, we had been trying and trying to get an audience with the Creator, but it had never happened. The angels told us that He was too busy, and we just waited for our time to come.
She squinted at the table, eyebrows creased, which probably meant he’d taken her when she’d been very young. I didn't know if it was worse or better if she’d seen us in that cage as a little girl. Four boys who were scared, angry, and lonely. I bet we’d looked like a bunch of losers.
She popped her head up and snapped her fingers. “Yes, I did!”
Our faces all darkened, ready for the worst. Was she going to think less of us?
“But it was empty. When I asked Pop Pop about it, He laughed and said something about horses getting their freedom. When I asked Him what kind of horses, He just laughed and said I would understand one day, then we went for ice cream.”
Suddenly it clicked for her, and her mouth dropped open. She looked around the table at all of us. “Were… Were you guys the horses?” Then I heard her whisper in a low tone, “At least that explains the huge dicks.”
I almost choked on the water I was drinking because the way she said that made us seem like animals, and maybe we were, but I wanted her to see us as something more. Especially since we were created by her grandfather for a single purpose.
“Yes. We were kept in that shit hole from the day we were created. Told that we were nothing but a tool to be used at the right time. Told that we didn't need to know anything but that. Not knowing if we would live past our detonation date or not. We still don’t know about that one,” D spat in disgust, like it was her fault.
The horror in Lillian’s eyes was something that could not be faked, but D went on like it was.
“And while you got to have your life here, being a princess in Hell, being taught everything about everything by Lucifer, and apparentlyPop Pop, we were raising ourselves! Having no one to learn from, no one to lean on. We had to figure it all out, figure out our powers, how to control the damn things before we started something we didn't mean to. We didn't have a mansion or a fancy house. We didn't have a father to show us what to do or how to act. We had nothing!”
His face contorted into pure rage. It wasn’t for her. It was because he didn’t know how to handle his feelings about himself and the past, and though I understood it, I wasn’t going to just let this asshole take it out on my goddess just because he had the emotional maturity of a fucking child.
I immediately got up, chair crashing to the floor behind me, ready to launch at him like he wasn't my brother, because no one talked to my goddess like that. No one.
Apparently, I wasn't the only one. Con and Fame followed suit, standing to defend our lady. A small, slender hand landed on my forearm, immediately cooling my disgust and rage. I looked down at my mate, the beautiful strong being that could bring the largest of beings to their knees, and took in a breath. I could feel her anger through the bond, I could feel a sliver of hurt too, but it was mainly the former and I knew this demon angel wasn't going to take no shit from no one. Mates included.
