I knew for a fact she wasn't thinking about the seal I placed on her to let all other demons know that if they fucked with her, they fucked with me. In that moment, she was worried about disappointing me, making the client angry, and having my event ruined because of it. She’d focused on that anger until she’d exploded and told that demon, in no uncertain terms, that he was going to fix those vegan canapes we ordered if it was the last thing he ever did.How could I not want to hire a girl like that and keep her with good benefits? Poachers are a real thing you know!
I gave her a knowing smile. “Ya, right, but anyways… I will make sure to keep up on my feedings so I'm ready for the week. Since you are sending me somewhere swanky tomorrow, I think I'm going to slum it tonight,” I told her cheerily.
She scowled at my flippant attitude.
“I wish you would date someone more at your level.” Her irritated tone could be felt from a mile away. “YouareLucifer's daughter.”
She whispered that last part, and I felt my eyes burn with Hellfire for a second, which just meant they flashed red as she named he-who-must-not-be-named in front of me. She put up her hands and tipped her head down to show respect, sorry for bringing the sore subject up, but she did have a point. A small, very small, deep, deep down inside piece of me agreed with her.
I was suddenly bombarded by memories of when I had tried to date a demon: my first love. He wasn't a bad guy or anything—at least for a demon—but I always had this overwhelming sense of dread when I thought of forever with him. I just couldn't do it. Strings like love got in the way of me being me. I had other sides of myself that I’d like to explore, and that was why I felt like I couldn't tie myself down to someone. I couldn't let those other pieces of me wither and die. I refused to. Plus, forever was a lie. My parents taught me that lesson.
“Date?!” I screeched in horror, not wanting her to know where my mind went.
She slumped and finally fell into one of the seats, looking like she was going to give up on badgering me.
I wanted to nail this issue in its coffin, so I continued, “Who said anything about dating these fuckers? I just want to fuck their brains out and go home. I don't need to bring a pet home when the whole world is my pet.” I gave a shimmy to show her that I really just wanted to have a good time and that was it.
“Fine! Live in your delusional, lonely world. Who am I but the human assistant who doesn't know anything, while you’re an all-powerful being?”
I felt a twinge of insecurity and pain in that sentence, and I straightened.
“Hey, hey, I'm not trying to say you don't give good advice—‘cuz you do. I'm just saying that this lady is not ready to settle down yet.”Or ever. I gave her an encouraging smile; one I hoped she believed. She gave me one last look before she sighed and dropped her chin into her hands.
“I’m sorry, Lil. I just… I just want you to be happy. You have done so much for me, and the thought of you being alone all the time makes me want to punch something.” She looked down at her nails and started to pick at them, which was just an adorable tick of hers.
Man, were we two peas in a pod.
I could see indecision on her face, and she opened her mouth before closing it again. It looked like she still had more on her mind, so I just sat there, patiently waiting. If something was bothering her, I would rather she get it out, especially as she was the only person in this world I actually genuinely enjoyed. She was my down bitch, and I wanted to make sure she knew she could tell me anything, even if I didn’t want to hear it.
She finally shook her head and faced me. “I feel like you came to this human plane to be free, but you can’t really do that if you can’t live how we live here, experience things how we experience them. The good, the bad, and the heartbreak. It’s all valuable in its own way, and I feel like you’re skipping it to try to save yourself.”
Her wisdom surprised me because it was true, painfully true, but I also still didn’t know how to handle those kinds of feelings. I couldn’t take those forward steps or vulnerable moves, even if I wanted to. So, I stayed in my lane and hoped that someday someone would push me out and make me feel again. Until then, I was going to have fun and not care. I wasn’t holding my breath for Prince Charming.
“I get it, Cass, I do. And thank you. It means a lot to me that you care about me so much.”
She gave me a knowing look, and I made an effort to give her more. “I willtryto be better at that, okay? No promises, but I will try.” I lifted both my hands in surrender so she knew I meant it.
She nodded her head, knowing that was the best I could do right now. She sat up and looked at her watch before she shot up to her feet and ran to the door.
“Shoot, I have that meeting with the building manager today to see about lowering our rent.”
Damn, that girl was fast! I called to her retreating form, “But I just closed a huge deal? We don’t really need it if you don’t want to go.”
She looked at me over her shoulder and gave me a Cheshire cat grin.
“I may not be a demon, but there’s something about negotiating a deal in our favor that I really love.”
I laughed at her as I yelled, “Go get ‘em, tiger! I’ll make a demon out of you yet.”
She winked at me and closed the door behind her. The echo of the door closing and me being alone again drove in that knife I’d felt the tip of when she’d read me like a book. I wondered if I was just that readable with her or if it was something she had come up with over the many years she had been my assistant.
I slapped my hands on my desk, trying to shake the sad, depressed vibes from my body as I got up. It was no use thinking about that shit now. I had a dive bar calling my name and some yummy one-night stands to break in.
Iwasonmythird fuck of the night and starting to feel like my week was taking a turn for the worst. If the last two men I fucked tonight were any indicator of how my week was going to go, it was going to be uneventful, sad, and unsatisfying.
I was bouncing against the bathroom wall, standing on my tippy toes because this fucker was not strong enough to hold me up as he fucked me. We tried. He failed. So, I’d told him to squat down as I stood up, and here I was, suffering through this mediocre sex against a dirty bathroom wall. Something I wouldn’t mind if it was good sex.
“Do you like that, baby? Do you like that big dick fucking you?” Big? Oh he wished.
