“He wants to fuck you, Delilah.”
Denial is quick to rise, and I sputter. “No way. He sees me as a little sister. That’s it.”
“He does see you as someone precious, but he also wants to fuck you. He’s conflicted because you’re his foster sister. All you have to do is give him the slightest provocation, and he’ll fucking take it.”
“Are you talking from experience?”
“You’re my obsession,” he says, ignoring my question. “When it comes to you, I’m the furthest from immune.”
I stare at him, not sure what to make of that. He’s not making any sense. But that hasn’t stopped my heart from stuttering in my chest.
“I know for a fact that Ben feels the same way I do,” I say.
Xavier gives me an exasperated look. “He’s wanted to fuck you for three years. Maybe even longer. Trust me, he’ll take any chance he can to get close to you. Why do you think he chased you in the woods? He wanted you to be his bride, not mine.”
I scrutinize Xavier’s face, searching for lies, but there’s nothing. Nothing except a truth I’m not ready to accept.
“You’re wrong, and I’ll prove it to you,” Xavier says. “Has Benjamin ever touched you for longer than necessary under the guise of affection?”
“I—”
“Has he ever looked at you with longing and you mistook it for platonic love?”
“Wait.”
“Tell me, did he ever say something that could’ve held an underlying message?”
My stomach drops. I want to tell Xavier to go fuck himself, but his words have provoked my memory bank. Images from the past flit before my eyes of me and Ben.
The look in his eyes the night before he left for college. The way he said he wanted to kill Frank for me... I should have noticed sooner.
“No.” The denial holds no power. I shake my head as though it’ll clear my mind of the uncertainty plaguing me. “This isn’t how things are between us.”
“One final question. I know he sees you as something more, but do you see him as a brother?”
I clamp my lips, refusing to answer.
With his free hand, Xavier takes a strand of my hair and twists it around his finger. “A man who is in love with you, a man who has been a brother figure, or a man who is a member of the Order... which do you see?”
My chest rises and falls with every shallow breath. “Ben is my brother.”
“Is he, little raptor?” Xavier’s hand stills as if he’s desperate for my answer. “Don’t lie to me. Not about this.”
“Yes.” I glare at him. “I’ve never looked at Ben like that.”
“I love the way you look at me.” He releases his hold on my neck and strokes his finger along the bottom of my lip. “Like you want to kill me, but you want to fuck me as well.”
I don’t say anything. There are a million questions bouncing around in my head, but I can’t form a single word with Xavier gazing at me with hunger in his eyes. After being ignored and rejected by guys throughout high school, his attention is unnerving and exhilarating.
I’m addicted to the feeling of being wanted, something I never felt this intensely before. Even with Ben.
“He’s my brother,” I whisper. It’s the only bit of truth I’m willing to recognize. Everything else has major implications that’ll come with change. I don’t want to lose my relationship with Ben.
“He doesn’t see you in the same way.”
“I…” I close my mouth, unable to convince myself that Xavier’s wrong.
He drags his lips along my jaw. “He’ll fight me for you. And he’ll lose. I won’t hesitate to get rid of him.”
