While Faith was very happy to hear this from Casey, she realized something at that moment: Casey, who had always seemed so confident to Faith, was actually a lot like her. Casey used her confidence to hide her insecurities. What Faith now understood from Casey’s apology was that Faith wasn’t necessarily the weaker one; they were both weak in ways. Faith looked up to Casey for her outward strength while Casey needed her sister in times of crisis. Together, they were strong.
Faith shook her head. “It was really silly to have avoided you for so long over that. It makes absolutely no sense to me now.”
“I’ve missed you so much.”
“I’ve missed you too.”
“Thank you for helping me with Scott. I couldn’t have done it without you.” Casey peeked in to the cottage and smiled at her husband through the window. He was laughing at something Nan was saying.
“You’re welcome.” Faith had never felt more confident. In all the years she and Casey had spent together at this beach, it had taken until now before Faith truly understood her sister. “This is a wonderful beginning, getting this cottage,” she said. “It’ll be a place where we can always be together.” She put her arm around her sister.
They’d spent all evening with Nan, chatting and taking photos, and finally, Isabella, unable to keep her eyes open any longer, asked if she could go to bed. Scott took her to her room and, when he didn’t return, Casey went and checked on him. He’d fallen asleep next to his daughter. Casey decided that she, too, was ready for bed, and she joined her little family for the night. Nan was dozing in the chair, and Mom, having just finished cleaning everything up—she never let anyone help her—called out to Faith and Jake on the porch to tell them she was heading to bed as well, leaving them alone.
Jake had come outside to test out the swing he’d hung earlier for Nan. He didn’t need to test it, though, because Faith had been swinging on it for a while already and it was perfectly secure. He sat down next to her, and they were so close that, to be comfortable, he put his arm around her, along the back of the swing. She let her feet dangle, as he pushed them gently back and forth. Even though he hadn’t done anything to prompt it, she put her head on his shoulder.
Faith wished they could spend many nights just like this. But then the truth of the situation set in: She was leaving tomorrow. She may never see him again, even though she hoped he’d keep in touch and, at the very least stop by when she visited the cottage. But would he? Would their two weeks together fade away in his memory eventually? A sense of urgency washed over her. But what could she do? He hadn’t said a thing. Did he have any thoughts on the subject of her leaving at all?
“I go home tomorrow,” she said finally.
“I know.” He was very quiet, not his usual self.
What else could she say?Say something!she wanted to yell out. The more she sat there, the more she wondered if he wasn’t saying anything because he didn’t have anything to say. Jake had given her signs that her feelings weren’t one-sided—those looks he gave her, the way he smiled at her, the softness of his voice compared to the way he spoke to other people, the times he’d kissed her. It all meant something, right?
“Do you care?” she asked, mustering all her inner strength and sitting up to face him. She spread her hands out on her thighs to keep them from trembling.
He turned to her, his face distorted in confusion. He looked almost offended.
“Do you care that I’m leaving?” She was taking a big chance here, because if he truly didn’t care then what would he say? She was putting him on the spot and she knew it, but if she didn’t, she’d never know. For once, she knew where she wanted her life to go, even if she didn't know how things would turn out. She didn’t know if Jake was someone she could be with long-term, but how would she ever get to that point if she didn’t take a risk and find out.
“I’ve thought about it, yes,” he said softly, not making eye contact.
She tried to hide the hurt. It wasn’t a grand gesture like she’d hoped.
She thought about Nan and what she’d said about those major moments not being as big when she looked back on them. No matter what happened tonight, she’d move on, her life would carry on, and years later, this moment would be but a memory. So, she decided it was time she got on with living her life. She wasn’t going home until she had answers.
Before she could say anything, he said, “Faith, you scare me to death. You are the person that I enjoy being around. I can’t stand being away from you. I tried. For the last two days, I wanted to see if I could stand being without you and it was the worst two days I’ve ever had. But when I married Rebecca, I envisioned this perfect life where I grew old with someone and had a family. I worked hard to build something with her and I thought I was doing everything right. But then, when we started seeing things differently regarding my work, she wasn’t happy anymore. She wasn’t the person I thought she was, and I should’ve seen it. I tried to build a life, and I hadn’t done it right.”
“What do you mean, ‘done it right’?”
“I know how to build things. That’s what I do. I can make magnificent structures, beginning with nothing but dirt. And I’m good at it. But when it comes to building a life with someone, being a husband, I’m clearlynotgood at it. I was just myself, and that wasn’t enough. When I got divorced, my life crumbled down around me, and I had to rebuild it. I’ve done that. I’ve done it in a way that makes me happy. But when I started talking to you, I could feel that foundation wobble. The very last thing I want is someone trying to change my mind about the life I’ve created.” He took a breath and shook his head.
“Do you know what you’re not good at?” she asked, taking another risk. She put her hands around his waist and turned him toward her until they were facing each other.
“What?” he asked, looking at her intently, yet his eyes so gentle that it almost took her breath away.
“You’re not good at trusting yourself. Yes. You’re good at building. But you’re great at being you. How do you know it wasyou? You just believed your ex-wife as if her word was definitive. What if it washer?”
He shook his head, clearly unsure.
“I have another question.”
He looked up at her.
“Do you like the Tides Wine Bar? Do you enjoy eating there? Honestly?”
He stared at her as if she were reading his mind. A wave of excitement sheeted over her when she realized she had. She could read him too. With a smile, she said, “You don’t like it, do you?”
“Rebecca was so excited about that restaurant. She couldn’t wait for it to be built. She said we needed something like that in the Outer Banks. So, when I wanted to impress you, I took you there, thinking that’s what kind of place a woman might want. She liked high-end places, flowers…”
