Lifting my phone, I text Trick.
Hey, it’s time I go to my parents’ house. They must be frantic re: Monet. If you don’t think it’s safe, can u drive me? I’ll get a different ride back to Boston.
* * *
Trick
My guys find Monet and are on the way with her to her parents’ house, where I plan to intercept her for a talk. Laurel’s not going to be up nights and strung out with worry while she’s pregnant, so little sis is going to straighten up or she’s going away.
After smoothing things over with C for hijacking crue members without telling him, I read the text message from Laurel. I don’t even want to know what she and Zoe disagreed about because I don’t care. There are big threats and issues to deal with. I need everyone to settle down and get along.
My mind goes to the liquor cabinet, but it’s not the time for daylight drinking. Unless I want to say to hell with this and let Laurelyn go back to Boston for a while. It would give her and the crue time to come to terms with the new reality. I frown. For me it would suck since I want her in my bed, but I could get her an apartment in a high security building and put a bodyguard on her. I could visit her there, just like I visit the rest of my family.
Right now I’m fighting battles on so many fronts. Maybe too many to win them all. Can’t afford to lose the war with Enzo Palermo. Can’t afford to lose against the FBI. Losing those fights means death or life in prison, and there’d be fallout for the entire crue. If I let Laurel go for a while, I’m the only one who loses.
Going into the game room, I rub the back of my neck. Racking the balls on the pool table, I make my decision, though it makes me feel like disappearing to Dorchester myself for an all-nighter of hard drugs that’ll wipe my mind blank.
I chalk my cue stick and break, watching the balls roll into pockets.
“Hey.”
It’s Rachel’s voice, along with cooing Irina. I don’t turn around immediately because I’m not sure I can get my game face on again yet.
“Good morning.” Injecting as much friendliness as I can into my voice, I shoot a couple more times. Then when I get my shit together, I turn and find she’s gone. I set the stick against the wall and head into the hall.
“Hey, did you need something?”
Rachel turns, her expression serious. “Last year I did. And you were there, Trick. More than once.”
It’s true, but what is there to say to that? Nothing. So I’m silent.
She shifts the baby in her arms. “The question is what do you need?”
“You did it last night. If I think of something else, I’ll let you know.”
“Good. Do that.”
As she starts to turn, I walk closer. “Honestly…” I trail off. There’s an emptiness in me when I think about letting Laurel live in Boston. I wonder if Rachel could help me by reaching out to Laurelyn and befriending her a little. I was counting on that happening naturally with Zoe, but no joy. But how can I ask Rachel to open up to Laurelyn when I’m not sure she can be trusted? I can’t risk Anvil and Rachel. My voice is low when I continue, feeling the gravity of where I’m at. “The truth is I’m the captain of a sinking ship. I’m trying to patch the holes, but… it’s not working.”
Her voice is soft but resolute. “What should I do? Bail water? Or weld something?”
That cheers me up a little. “If I thought it would help.” The shake of my head is short and sharp. “I guess… when you’re standing on shore, play some music till all the lifeboats are away. And play loud enough for me to hear until you know I can’t hear anymore.”
“Here,” she says, holding Irina out. “Hug her while I get my violin.”
“‘Vil won’t like it.”
“Take her.”
I curl the baby against my chest, studying her little face. She’s pretty like Rachel, but it’s possible she got ‘Vil’s crazy crisscrossed eyelashes. If she’s gonna have one thing of his, at least that’ll work for her.
“One-handed. Just as I suspected. You’re not scared of babies.”
“Nah.” I don’t say it’s because I became a dad at thirteen. My heartbroken ma stayed in bed most days for a long time after the funeral and, when Kathleen was gone, it was on me to make sure the three-year-old baby didn’t starve or get neglected. That time wasn’t pretty. It was harsh, especially when we ran out of money. I was a kid myself, and I ran that house at the same time I was going to school and planning a hit. But I kept us all alive and Kathleen safe from Murphy. People wonder why I never get overwhelmed when the world’s burning down. It’s because I know how to I grit my way through anything.
If there’s trouble, bring it.
Walking toward the game room, I ask Irina, “Want to learn how to play pool, baby?”
