“I don’t know,” Nico said, confused. “Do you have fur and paws right now?”
Mal giggled. “Nope. Just skin.” Suddenly, his face dropped, his expression so deadly serious, Nico’s heart skidded to a stop, only for Mal to say, “Did you know that rabbits can see almost 360 degrees?”
Nico bit his lip to keep from laughing when Mal attempted to demonstrate how that might look, eyeballs rolling in his head.
He had known that. They’d watched that documentary together. “Wow,” he said encouragingly.
“Also, they eat their own poop,” Mal grumbled, face scrunching into a look of…not disgust, but…disappointment, maybe, like he’d expected better from them. Which was fair.
“Gross,” was all Nico could think to say.
Mal leaned in closer, expression menacing, “And their teeth… Never. Stop. Growing.”
Nico swallowed audibly. He must have missed that part of the documentary. “That’s…highly disturbing.”
Mal nodded rapidly, then tilted his head and blurted, “You’re so hot.”
Nico blinked at him. He was getting whiplash, trying to keep up with Mal’s thoughts. Thoughts he seemed incapable of keeping to himself. “Thanks.”
Nico gasped as Mal grabbed his shirt and hauled him in until they were nose to nose. “I’m gonna marry you so hard some day.”
A blush crept up Nico’s neck to his cheeks. “You’re high.”
“You’re pretty,” Mal said wistfully.
“Yes, we’ve established this,” Nico said, amused, leaning back.
“Can I touch your butt?”
Nico snorted. “What?”
Mal sighed, squeezing Nico’s imaginary butt with his hands. “I think it has, like, healing properties.”
Well, it was nice to see some things hadn’t changed. “No.”
“Come on,” he pleaded, sounding a little like Jagger had a few minutes ago. “Just for a minute.” He pooched his bottom lip out, “Please? I’m hurt.”
Nico was glad Mal didn’t normally act like this or he’d be cooked. He folded almost immediately. It wasn’t his fault, though. Mal usually had this way about him that people found off-putting. Like he was trying to mask but the mask didn’t fit. It left people feeling uneasy.
But this Mal had none of the angst. He wasn’t worried about fitting in. He was almost childlike in his thoughts and demands.
“Fine.” Nico sighed.
Mal grunted as he wiggled to recline himself on his pillows. Without any preamble, he grabbed Nico’s ass with both hands then dragged him on top of him. “Baby, stop. Your ribs are bruised.”
“They are?” he asked. “I don’t feel anything.” He gave Nico the dopiest grin he’d ever seen. “Except this.” He squeezed Nico’s ass again. “I feel this. It’s nice. Your butt is the best.”
Nico preened, resigned to having his already slightly tender ass caressed and squeezed by his boyfriend. “It’s just a butt like any other.”
“Uh-uh,” Mal said stubbornly, his bunny teeth in full view. “It’s really round…and jiggly like Jell-O.” He stopped mid-squeeze. “I hate Jell-O.”
Nico blinked at him. “Alright.”
“But I love your ass,” he said with a sigh.
“Okay, I get the?—”
“It’s like two firm pillows. I could sleep all night with my face right here.” Mal sighed dreamily, jiggling Nico’s cheeks.
