“So, what was it?” Levi muttered, eyes dull, like he’d already prepared himself for the next blow.
Shiloh could feel tears pricking at the back of his eyes. Why did this hurt so much? Why did it already feel so heavy between them? “I get…nervous.”
Levi dragged his hands around Shiloh’s back to his waist, squeezing once. “Nervous?”
Shiloh nodded, suddenly wanting to look anywhere but at Levi, who now gazed at him with such sincerity it shattered Shiloh’s heart. “Sex has never been good for me, and what you were doing, what we were doing—” He cut himself off, heat creeping from his neck to the tips of his ears. “It felt so…so good. Too good. And I was trying so hard to get out of my own head because I wanted you to feel good, too. And I thought I was doing it all wrong, and when you hit pause, I-I panicked.”
Levi stared at him as Shiloh’s misery built like water behind a dam, threatening to break free and drown him.
“You panicked,” Levi echoed.
Levi didn’t believe him. Of course, he didn’t. Why should he? They were strangers. Beyond strangers. They knew nothing about each other. All Levi knew was that Shiloh was a criminal and a liar and a spy. But why did it have to hurt so badly?
Still, Shiloh clung to the fact that Levi hadn’t shoved him away. That had to mean something, right? He wanted to rewind time and start over again. He wanted to go back to yesterday in Levi’s bed when he looked down at him like he was something special and worthy. He wanted his hands on him, his lips, wanted to feel him press him into the mattress once more.
Shiloh was so lost in his thoughts, he almost forgot Levi still waited for an answer. He owed him the truth, no matter how humiliating. He dropped his gaze to his lap. “Yes,” he whispered. “I panicked. It doesn’t mean I didn’t want you to keep going. When I’m nervous, I just say stupid stuff. I just didn’t want you to be disappointed in me if the sex was bad. And it probably wouldn’t have been great.”
He sucked in a breath as Levi gripped his chin gently, tilting his face up to look at him. Shiloh’s already galloping heart tripped over itself, the air too thick to breathe. He ached to close the distance. He needed Levi to kiss him, to hold him, to reassure him they were okay. That he hadn’t ruined everything. Not having Levi’s arms around him suddenly felt like a punishment.
A pitiful whine fell from his lips. He needed Levi to get it, to read his mind and give him what he needed. Levi’s eyes widened, shifting almost imperceptibly until Shiloh felt pathetic in a different way. Small, helpless, like prey. But not like when his brother looked at him.
Levi dragged him forward, pressing his lips to Shiloh’s ear, murmuring, “What am I going to do with you?”
Goosebumps erupted along his skin as teeth bit at his earlobe. “What do you want to do with me?” he gasped.
Levi pulled back to stare at him from beneath hooded lids, his thumb stroking over the seam of Shiloh’s lips, now laser focused. “That’s a loaded question, Dimples. There are a lot of things I want to do with you.”
“Like what?” Shiloh asked, voice trembling just a bit.
“Like this.” Levi closed the distance between them, tongue tracing the same path as his thumb, humming his approval when Shiloh’s lips parted.
“You’re so good for me,” he said, tongue dipping inside.
His praise shot through Shiloh like lightning, electrifying his blood and making heat pool low in his belly. He was already half-hard.
The kiss intensified quickly. One of Levi’s hands was back on Shiloh’s ass, squeezing, and the other was buried in Shiloh’s curls, holding him in place as he plundered his mouth. Levi kissed him like he needed him, like he’d die without him. He wasn’t gentle, sucking and biting at Shiloh’s lips, swallowing each one of his gasps and moans.
Shiloh could only hang on, arms wrapping around Levi’s neck and letting him take what he wanted. Kissing Levi was heavy, all-consuming, dizzying in the best possible way. It made him forget everything but the taste of his lips and the stroke of his tongue and hands that seemed to be everywhere.
Shiloh made a sad sound when Levi’s lips broke from his with a wet pop, but he didn’t go far, mouth attaching to the side of Shiloh’s neck. Shiloh’s eyes fluttered, hands spasming in the fabric of Levi’s shirt as he tilted his head to give him better access. Just like his kisses, he was all teeth, scraping and suckingas he explored Shiloh’s jaw, his ear, even biting at his shoulder until Shiloh was desperate for more.
When Levi canted his hips, Shiloh made another frustrated whine. Levi was so hard beneath him, the pressure was so good against Shiloh’s own aching cock. He buried his face, nosing at the spot where Levi’s throat and shoulder met. The next time Levi ground up against him, Shiloh rolled down experimentally, gasping at the shock of mind-numbing pleasure that rocketed through his whole body. Had it felt this good last night? Had anything felt this good in his whole life?
Levi’s lips found his again, sucking Shiloh’s tongue in a way that made him feel a little faint. He tugged Shiloh’s bottom lip between his teeth, biting the plump flesh then tugging a little again before he pulled back to ask, “Are you okay?”
Something that felt a lot like love exploded behind Shiloh’s ribs at the concern in Levi’s voice. He nodded frantically. “Yes. This feels so good. Please, don’t stop.”
Levi’s eyes widened at Shiloh’s plea, then he made a low sound in the back of his throat before dragging him back for another kiss. This time, it was Shiloh who ground down, moaning at the sensation.
“Still feel good?” Levi asked against his lips.
“So good,” Shiloh whispered.
Levi’s hands fell to his hips again, encouraging him into a rhythm, then letting Shiloh do as he pleased. Shiloh couldn’t stop rutting against him, quickly addicted to the stab of bliss that rocketed through him each time they collided. Levi was so hard against him. Because of Shiloh. Because he wanted Shiloh.
Levi held him tighter against him, lips against his ear. “That’s it. That’s so good. You’re doing so good. Fuck. Keep going. Make yourself feel good.”
Shiloh trembled as much from Levi’s words as the pleasure of his movements. He couldn’t stop rocking against him, clawing at his shoulders, rubbing his cheek against Levi’s scruffy jaw.
