Levi’s heart shattered. “Shiloh?” he gasped.
The boy’s face was almost unrecognizable. Cuts and bruises everywhere, all in various stages of healing. He looked like he’d taken a tumble, but Levi knew the truth. His brother. Shiloh’s monster of a brother had done that to him. Because of Levi? Was this the consequence of Shiloh failing in his mission?
Levi sucked in heavy breaths, his fury racing through him, leaving him hot. He clenched his jaw, hands curling into fists. That fucker needed to die. Who could do this to someone like Shiloh? He was so small, so pretty, so fragile…delicate. There was no way Shiloh could have protected himself against his much larger brother.
Levi should never have let Shiloh run off that night. He should have kept him there, safe with him. Levi took a deep breath and let it out, trying not to frighten Shiloh any more than he already seemed.
He hunkered down beside him, balancing on the balls of his feet, keeping his tone soft. “Hey, are you okay?”
Of course, he’s not okay, idiot.He’d had the shit beat out of him, more than once it seemed.
Still, Shiloh just nodded, giving him a tremulous smile that almost immediately dissolved as tears pooled in his eyes, threatening to spill. Levi gently gripped his chin, turning his head to catalog the damage. The cuts were closed with glue but the edges had been approximated well; he likely wouldn’t have any jagged scars. Had his brother patched him up? Did he have people for that? Had some ER doctor just looked the other way when Shiloh had come in for help?
No matter how Levi turned Shiloh’s head, he refused to meet his gaze, his humiliation obvious.
Levi’s chest was tight, words choked as he asked, “What did he do to you, baby?”
Shiloh’s tears broke free as he pitched himself into Levi’s arms. He hugged him tight, bringing them both to their feet so he could pull him close. Shiloh clung to him, hands twisting the fabric of Levi’s work shirt tightly, desperately, like Levi was the lone life raft in a stormy sea.
Levi tucked Shiloh beneath his chin, crushing him against his chest as hot tears soaked through the fabric to his skin. Sobs racked through him, making Levi feel like loosening his grip might cause the boy to shake apart entirely. Levi couldn’t remember the last time he cried. Years, maybe? Naomi said tears were a manipulation tactic. That Levi was manipulating her into feeling bad.
He shook thoughts of his mother away. There was no room for her there. Not now. Shiloh continued to bawl, heaving wails that caused him to hiccup and hyperventilate. “Shh. Shh. You’re okay. You’re okay now,” Levi crooned, swaying the boy in his arms.
Levi ached for him. Why was Shiloh out there alone in the dark? In the streets? How long had he waited for him? What ifsomething had happened to him while he waited? Levi would never have even known.
“We can’t stay here, baby. It’s not safe,” Levi said, scanning their deserted surroundings.
Shiloh didn’t answer, only sobbed harder. An uneasy feeling settled over Levi as he studied his surroundings with a sharper eye. Was this a trap? Was Shiloh just bait? It didn’t matter. He wasn’t letting him go, even if it meant eating a bullet. Levi had been willing to die for less. Once upon a time, he’d begged for death.
The streets were quiet. No movement. No sounds with the exception of the usual road noise from the highway running behind the garage. The air was thick, heavy. The smells of the city filtered in as he waited for Shiloh’s tears to slow. The sharp stench of rotting garbage mingled with that of rain and motor oil collected in the potholes from the rainstorm that happened earlier in the evening.
If Levi looked close enough, he could see cardboard boxes stacked as a makeshift shelter for the unhoused. Some slept on ratty sleeping bags deeper in the alley, but they were harmless. Ever since the 4Loco crew had disappeared, crime had gone way down. The bar across the street had closed months ago. So had the bail bonds office.
Even so, Levi wanted to get Shiloh inside where it was safe…where he could keep him safe.
Levi rested his chin on the crown of Shiloh’s hair, listening to him sniffle and take in shuddering breaths. He dropped kisses on the crown of his head without thought. “Shh. Shh. Just breathe. It’s all gonna be alright.”
It was all meaningless platitudes, words whispered in the dark to try to soothe the boy somehow. But what else could he say?I’m sorry your brother beats the shit out of you and forces you to commit crimes?Talk about a useless sentiment.
Levi had never been any good at the feelings stuff. He was too blunt, too jaded. He’d closed himself off to anything that could hurt him years ago. It protected his heart but made him shit at providing comfort. Nico said he lacked decorum, whatever the fuck that meant.
Levi was much better at the physical than he was at emotion. That was why he kept his relationships all about sex. Why he’d convinced himself he’d had a crush on his friend, Arsen, for ten years. It was far safer to crush on someone who would never reciprocate the feelings. When he was horny, there was no shortage of guys willing to be his one-night stand.
The thought of using Shiloh that way had his stomach churning. He wanted him, he couldn’t deny that. He was soft and sweet and smelled like cotton candy and laundry detergent. He wanted to help him somehow. Wanted to make him feel better. But Shiloh hadn’t come to Levi for sex, he’d come to him for…well, Levi honestly had no idea what he’d come to him for.
Protection? He’d love to protect him, to keep him safe, whatever that entailed. He’d happily murder Shiloh’s brother and bring the boy his head on a pike. Levi knew nothing about Shiloh. Not even his last name. But Levi had never wanted to protect someone the way he did the boy in his arms. If it was possible, he’d scoop him up and cage him behind his ribs so nobody could get to him without going through Levi first.
Shiloh’s tears seemed to have ebbed, but he continued to cling to Levi, his fingertips ghosting over the skin just above the waistband of his jeans, driving Levi crazy. There was no way Shiloh couldn’t feel that Levi was half-hard just holding him. He probably thought he was some kind of pervert who got off on his tears. But he couldn’t stop the way his body reacted. Something in him recognized something in Shiloh and acted accordingly. But if Shiloh noticed, he didn’t acknowledge it. He also didn’t pull away.
Finally, Levi took a small step back, cupping Shiloh’s face and tipping it up to meet his gaze. The tears had stopped, but his mouth was shaped into an adorable pout, his eyes puffy and bloodshot, his nose and cheeks bright red. He was sweaty and appeared as exhausted as Levi felt. But it didn’t stop Levi from wanting to taste him again. He wanted to kiss the frown from his lips.
“Now, can you tell me why you’re here?” Levi asked. “Are you in trouble? Do you need help? I can help you.”
Shiloh’s gaze floated away, expression miserable. “I—” Shiloh cut himself off, pulling away, sniffling. “I need the gun back. Please,” he mumbled, almost as an afterthought, voice thick from tears.
Levi blinked at him, attempting to process his words. “What?” Shiloh trembled but didn’t answer. “Look at me.”
Shiloh’s eyes met his, face crumpling once again. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, but I need to get that gun back.” He started shaking his head, a fresh tide of tears flowing down his cheeks. “If I go back without it, Micah’s gonna…” He stepped away from Levi, pacing, his breaths coming harder and faster, eyes wild. “I just can’t go back without the gun. I can’t. I really can’t,” he said, voice frantic. “Do you have it? Here? Do you have it on you?”
