Maybe Aiden was right. Maybe this was just who they were, never allowing themselves pleasure unless it came with some level of sacrifice. Not that this felt like any kind of…penance. It was a little raw, a little painful…there was no smooth glide, just a sort of disjointed catch and slide that ached even as it shot jolts of delicious heat along his nerve endings.
Aiden grabbed Thomas’s hand, licking his palm and guiding it to his cock. Thomas jerked him in time with his motions, both of them too far gone to do anything but hold onto each other as they chased their own orgasms.
Thomas tried to hold off, tried to wait until Aiden was there, too, but he couldn’t. The heat, the friction, the smell of their sweat, the panting grunts of Aiden working himself on his cock…it was all too fucking much. He couldn’t stop himself. When he came, he bit down on Aiden’s chest, something that was wholly unlike him, but he just needed it, needed to feel his flesh between his teeth, needed to leave some mark, some visual reminder that this was all real. That he had been inside him.
Pleasure rolled over him in waves, his blunt nails digging into Aiden’s hips even as his teeth dug into his skin. Aiden cried out, and Thomas pulled away just in time to watch his release spill over his fist onto Thomas’s belly. He continued to work him in his fist, fascinated as he just kept coming. Finally, Aiden batted his hand away with a full-body shiver.
They both sat there, trying to drag in breaths, while Thomas attempted to will his heartbeat back to a normal rhythm, an almost impossible feat with Aiden clinging to him, his forehead resting on his shoulder.
Thomas wasn’t sure how long they sat there, but when Aiden finally shifted his weight, his muscles were stiff and they were both sticky, covered in sweat and cum. “This was hotter during the sex,” Aiden said, looking down at them with a grimace.
“There are wipes in the kill kit under the floorboard in the back,” Thomas noted. Aiden was up on his knees once more, then leaning over the back row, ass in the air as he rifled through the hidden compartment, giving a triumphant cry when he found what he was looking for. Thomas slapped his ass a second before Aiden settled back into the backseat, beside him this time.
They took their time cleaning each other up and getting dressed, at one point having to leave the vehicle to do so. When they got back in the front seat, Aiden insisted on driving. Thomas was content to let him. When he took his hand, threading their fingers together on the center console, Thomas closed his eyes, enjoying the unfamiliar feeling spreading through his chest.
What was it? Not love. Hedidlove Aiden, but he loved a lot of people, so he knew what that felt like. This was something else, something soothing and…quiet. Contentment. He was content. When was the last time he’d ever felt completely at ease? And why now? Things were not settled by any means. Maybe he was just cum drunk. But it didn’t feel that way.
Whatever it was, he didn’t want to lose it. He didn’t want it to go away. He didn’t want Aiden to go away.
“I can hear you thinking from here,” Aiden said, squeezing his hand. “We’re so close to figuring this out. You just have to hang in there for a few more days. Okay?”
Thomas nodded. “It’s not that. I mean, of course, it’s that, but it’s not just that.” He spared a glance at Aiden, who was now frowning at him. This time, it was Thomas who squeezed his hand. “Now, I can hearyouthinking,” he teased.
“Well, you have a bit of a track record,” Aiden said, sounding slightly huffy. “Whenever you get all broody, it usually means I’m about to be dismissed…again.”
It was true. Twenty years of push and pull. For nothing. So much time he wasted. He owed Aiden a million apologies, but that would never be enough to undo the damage, to get back the time lost. So, instead, he just said, “I love you.”
The car veered dangerously towards a grove of trees before Aiden recovered, giving Thomas a wide-eyed look. “W-What?”
Thomas shrugged. “I love you.”
“But…” Aiden said warily.
Thomas shook his head. “No buts. I love you. And I think it’s time you come home. Forever.”
Aiden’s eyes darted from the road to Thomas and back again, like it was suddenly him having the crisis. “Where is all this coming from? Is this the orgasm talking?” Aiden shook his head. “You know what? I don’t care why. Yes, I’ll come home. Forever. But if you wake up tomorrow and say you’ve changed your mind, I’m going to lock you in the fucking basement and keepyouthere forever.”
That feeling of warmth continued to spread through Thomas until he felt almost giddy from it. “I won’t change my mind. Not this time.”
Aiden grinned and, for a full thirty seconds, they just smiled at each other like idiots. But then Aiden’s smile suddenly disappeared. “Fuck.”
Thomas frowned. “What’s wrong?”
“One of us is definitely going to fucking die now, for sure,” Aiden muttered.
“What?” Thomas asked, amused.
“This isn’t how we do things,” Aiden said. “We pine, we fight, we fuck, then we yell at each other, then we hate each other, and then we ignore each other…until it gets to be too much and we do it all over again. We’re not the type who get happy endings. That’s not for people like us. Now you’ve gone and said you love me with no qualifiers afterwards and that for sure means the universe is going to fuck us.”
Thomas blinked rapidly, then laughed. “I had no idea you were so…superstitious.”
“It’s not about superstition, it’s just my bad luck,” Aiden muttered. “I’m not allowed to have something I want. Ever.”
Even for all of his opining, he still hadn’t stopped holding Thomas’s hand. Aiden didn’t really mean what he was saying. He was just…venting. Scared. Thomas knew that. Because he was scared, too. Loving Aiden meant having something to lose. And while Thomas had always loved Aiden, it felt like some cursed, fairy tale, Greek tragedy kind of love. There had been safety in knowing you couldn’t lose what you never had.
But they definitely had something to lose now. They probably always had. “I promise I won’t die on you. And I won’t let you die on me.”
It was a ridiculous thing to say and optimistic considering their current situation, but Aiden’s shoulders sagged. “Promise?”
