Arlo lifted his head, expression bemused. “Easy, killer. One dead body is enough for today, I think.”
“Does it scare you?” Dimitri asked softly. “Do I scare you?”
Arlo gave a soft laugh. “No. Maybe it makes me a shitty person, but I like that you want to kill people for me. Does that scare you?” he countered.
“No. I feel relieved. If I could be sorry, I would be sorry that Mandy was such a bitch to you. I should have seen it coming. I just wanted to show you off.”
“You wanted to show me off,” Arlo echoed.
Dimitri frowned. “Is that, like—not misogynistic but—is that, like, not respecting your autonomy or something? My brain doesn’t really think in terms of, like, societal norms. I don’t want to offend you or make you feel bad.”
Arlo’s face flushed in the dim glow of the overhead light. “Nobody has ever wanted to ‘show me off.’ I’ve been a dirty little secret for so long that I don’t even know how to be out in public, and I’m not even the one in the closet.”
“You’ll never be that to me,” Dimitri promised.
Arlo smiled, lifting his hand to run his fingers over Dimitri’s cheek. “Mandy has been making me miserable for four years. It’s like she secretly knew I was into you or something and wanted me to know I never stood a chance. I knew what we were getting into. I just wasn’t ready for Jason’s…enthusiasm.”
Dimitri licked his lower lip. “I can’t promise I won’t be just as enthusiastic once I get you back to my apartment.” He leaned forward, capturing Arlo’s mouth in a kiss, darting his tongue quickly inside. “You know, where my bedroom is.”
“And your bed?” Arlo murmured.
“Yeah,” Dimitri said against his lips.
Arlo’s hand ran along the inside of Dimitri’s thigh, gasping when he felt how hard he was. “Then we should probably hurry.”
It seemed strange that, in all the times he and Dimitri had been dancing around each other, Arlo had never been to Dimitri’s apartment. Not even as friends. Dimitri had called it depressing, but it looked wonderfully normal to Arlo. There was a small kitchen, a tiny table sat nearby with two chairs, and there was a decent-sized living room with a comfortable-looking sofa and a big tv.
Arlo’s apartment was half the size, and he had to cook everything in a microwave or by using a hot plate. And his manager had control of the thermostat, so Arlo spent most fall and winter nights buried under a dozen blankets.
Dimitri’s apartment was tidy with everything in its place, except for the shoes Dimitri slipped off beside the door. Arlo did the same, butterflies taking flight in his belly as Dimitri smiled at him, pulling him towards the closed door to the left.
He was really going to have sex with Dimitri.More sex,he corrected, goosebumps erupting along his skin as he remembered the heat of Dimitri’s mouth on him. When the door closed behind them, Arlo reached for the hem of his shirt.
Dimitri’s hands gripped his wrists gently, just as Arlo had done to him earlier. “Whatcha doin’?”
Arlo frowned. “Getting naked. Isn’t that how this usually works?”
Arlo supposed they could leave their clothes on. It wouldn’t be the first time some guy just wanted access to the only part they found worthy of their attention. He’d thought Dimitri was different. He’d called Arlo his boyfriend. In public. Maybe that was all for show?
Dimitri sat on the edge of the bed and pulled Arlo close, resting his chin on Arlo’s diaphragm, gazing up at him to ask, “You got another date after me?”
Arlo flustered. “What? No.”
Dimitri grinned up at him. “I’m teasing.”
“Oh,” Arlo said, voice dull.
Arlo was suddenly hyper-aware of every atom in his own body, but it felt like he’d lost control of it. He was nervous, and there was a panic setting in that hadn’t been there moments before. He was ruining this. He was ruining everything.
“Are you okay?” Dimitri asked, voice gentle.
Arlo shook his head. “No. I’m not. I have no idea what we’re doing here, whatI’mdoing here.”
Dimitri frowned. “I thought we were both pretty clear about what we wanted in the car? But if you don’t want to do this, we don’t have to.”
Arlo’s heart was slamming into his ribs. Everything was overwhelming him. “I knowwhatwe’re doing, I just don’t knowhowwe’re doing it.”
“How?” Dimitri asked.
