Calder gripped Robby’s hips, steadying him, his thumbs tracing over the new ink on his hip bones. “I really like this top you’re wearing, but I bet you’d look even better without those jeans on.”
Robby was almost positive his heart stopped. Calder was close enough for Robby to feel the heat of his body, to smell peppermint and something slightly chemical. Robby gripped Calder’s shirt in his fists, feeling the need to hold onto something. He needed to speak but fear had robbed him of his voice.
Calder leaned in close enough for his beard to scratch against Robby’s cheek. “You scared of me, angel face?” he asked, tone teasing but not mean.
“I’m scared of everything,” Robby heard himself whisper.
“I won’t hurt you,” Calder promised, all traces of teasing gone. “I can go anytime you want.”
Frustration leached into Robby’s voice. “I don’t want you to go… I just don’t know what to do,” he admitted, wanting to crawl into a hole. There was nothing sexy about this conversation. Robby refused to look at him. He couldn’t. “Never mind. Let’s just forget…whatever this was.”
He turned to head to the bedroom, but found himself turned right back around, Calder’s finger under his chin, forcing his gaze upward. “Is that what you really want?”
A million thoughts assaulted Robby at once.No. Not at all. Stay with me. Fuck me. Spend the night. Spend the rest of your life. Or mine.All Robby could do was shake his head.
Calder’s lips grazed Robby’s forehead. “You want to take a shower with me?”
“Yes, please,” Robby whispered, breathless.
Calder cupped his face, gazing at him with a look Robby just couldn’t place.
“Jesus, you’re sweet,” Calder finally said. “Lead the way.”
Robby did as Calder asked, feeling like he had stopped breathing an hour ago. He had no idea what he was doing or how this had happened, but it seemed inevitable, like this was the final domino to fall in a line they’d pushed over months ago.
Calder took the lead, which Robby appreciated. His hands were shaking too hard to be of use anyway. He watched as Calder turned on the tap to the fancy rain shower, testing the water. Once he seemed to decide it was the right temperature, he released his hair from its elastic, letting it waterfall down his broad shoulders, before peeling his shirt over his head and dropping it to the floor. Robby itched to touch the springy hair on Calder’s chest and taut ridges of his abdomen but couldn’t seem to move. He swallowed hard as Calder moved into his space. He picked Robby up, depositing him on the lip of the sink, spreading his legs and stepping between them.
“Your turn,” he murmured, large hands caressing over Robby’s skin as his hoodie went over his head to join Calder’s shirt on the floor. He traced the words scrawled in ink over Robby’s heart, causing goosebumps to erupt along his skin. He blushed. He hated that tattoo.Daddy issues. “Mm, is that so?” Calder asked before his fingers found the bars that pierced the stiff peaks of Robby’s nipples.
He sucked in a shaky breath but sat frozen.
“You are just full of surprises, angel,” Calder whispered before his lips found Robby’s.
Calder kissed like he talked, slow like he was in no rush, brushing his lips over Robby’s again and again, each time lingering a bit longer until Robby opened up for him, wanting more. When Calder’s tongue slipped inside, Robby whimpered, overwhelmed. Was this what kissing always felt like? If kissing Calder felt like this, what would actual sex feel like?
“Fuck, so sweet,” Calder drawled against his lips once more before pulling back and unbuttoning his jeans. “Water’s gonna get cold.”
Robby couldn’t look away. He licked his lower lip as Calder removed his jeans and underwear, leaving him naked and hard in Robby’s bathroom. Everything about Calder was beautiful, even his erection, flushed red and twitching under Robby’s scrutiny. “Now you, angel face. What else are you hiding underneath that choirboy exterior?”
Once more, his inner voice flooded his brain with answers.Fear. Anxiety. Loneliness. An unhealthy obsession with gangsta rap and mochi.Robby let Calder pull him to his feet, trying not to orgasm on the spot as Calder dropped to his knees to remove Robby’s sneakers and socks before undressing him. Calder was close enough to feel his breath on Robby’s thigh. He bit down on his lip as Calder examined his hard and leaking cock. “Uncut,” Calder whispered. “Christ, you’re perfect.”
Robby didn’t think it was possible to blush harder but he did. He let Calder lead him into the shower, sighing as the hot water pelted his aching body. He leaned his forehead against the cool tiles, wondering if he still looked like somebody had thrown battery acid in his eyes. That couldn’t be sexy. Could Calder see the burn on his hip where the taser prongs had pressed against his skin? Before Robby could spiral further down the rabbit hole of crippling insecurity, Calder pulled him from the wall and began shampooing his hair.
Robby had never had anybody wash his hair before outside of a salon. Calder massaged his scalp, the blunt scrape of his nails dragging a moan from Robby. Was this what real relationships were like? He sagged against Calder, just letting the man take care of him. Soapy hands began to move along Robby’s chest and belly, scrubbing each part of him. When Calder went to his knees behind him once again, Robby held his breath, but Calder simply washed his feet, dropping kisses to the dimples on his back and the painful burn on his hip before standing again. It was maddening. Why wasn’t he doing more?
Robby made a noise of frustration.
Calder chuckled. “What’s wrong, angel face? You want something?”
He nodded, before whispering, “Yes.”
Calder’s lips found the spot just behind Robby’s ear, and his fingers tugged at Robby’s nipples hard enough to make his whole body feel like one live wire. “This what you want? You want me to play with you?”
“I… Yes… I don’t know. I just want more. I need you to touch me.”
Calder bit down on his earlobe, one hand sliding low on his belly. “I am touching you. Can’t you feel me?”
Robby could feel him, could feel Calder’s erection pressed against his lower back, could feel his arms around him. It was perfect, but it just wasn’t enough…not nearly enough. “Don’t tease me.”
